Venting I've finally made a decision, I'll leave this world on January, 21st.

[WornOutLife]

Hello dear fellows of SS,

I wanted to tell you that I've finally talked to some people who can get me SN so I've decided to ctb on the 21 of January.
Why 21? Well, it's a number which keeps popping up all the time so I guess it's some kind of signal.

This might be sudden, I know, but I just can't endure life anymore. I'm having such an anxiety these days! It's hell!!!

Anyway, I'll post a goodbye thread on January, 21st.

Meanwhile, let's enjoy our time together. I'll try to help you as much as I can!

Hugs and love,

Matt


Edit: If I happen to fail, I'll end up in a psych ward forever and ever. I'm ready for it.

 

[Spitfire]

& Matt

 

[WornOutLife]

& Matt

I'm really gonna miss you! You're such a great person!

 

[iguanah]

I'm really gonna miss you! You're such a great person!

i know we've never chatted, but i've just pegged my ctb for the 15th. best of luck to you.

out of curiosity, why sn over exit bag? that's my method and i think it's quite reliable

 

[TooMuchToBear]

Oh! I'm a newbie here but I've noticed your kindness and involvement in the community. You seem to be a beautiful person.
Didn't you say recently life was giving you new shots and the possibility of dating a girl? (I might mix up with somebody else, if that's the case forgive me).

 

[WornOutLife]

i know we've never chatted, but i've just pegged my ctb for the 15th. best of luck to you.

out of curiosity, why sn over exit bag? that's my method and i think it's quite reliable

Truth be told, I know nothing about exit bag. I just haven't done a proper research. Let's say I'm obsessed with SN (I used to pick partial hanging but I failed two times at it)

I've seen many members left us because of SN so I think it's the most suitable method for me.

Wish you peace, you will be leaving before my date! I'll miss you!


@TooMuchToBear

Yes, I was about to have a chance at life again but I'm having such panic attacks that I can't endure this life anymore. It's kinda a rush but, I really need to leave. You might be a newbie but you look like a lovely person! Thank you so much for your comment. I'll miss you!

 

[Spitfire]

I'm really gonna miss you! You're such a great person!

It is identical man it is the same feeling to you too, from me.

 

[iguanah]

Truth be told, I know nothing about exit bag. I just haven't done a proper research. Let's say I'm obsessed with SN (I used to pick partial hanging but I failed two times at it)

I've seen many members left us because of SN so I think it's the most suitable method for me.

Wish you peace, you will be leaving before my date! I'll miss you!


@TooMuchToBear

Yes, I was about to have a chance at life again but I'm having such panic attacks that I can't endure this life anymore. It's kinda a rush but, I really need to leave. You might be a newbie but you look like a lovely person! Thank you so much for your comment. I'll miss you!

okay totally makes sense, as for sn, i also know nothing about it lol, i remember trying partial hanging, holy fuck way too painful for me.

haha everyone on here is so sweet, will miss you brotha, but we won't miss our crushing depression & anxiety lmao

 

[Deleted member 24434]

I'll be sorry to see you go

 

[Nitup]

Oh we're going to miss you so much.. That's so sudden but I hope you will finally find peace.
You really deserve it, I'm a long time lurker and I must say that a lot of your posts were really really helpful in a lot of ways.

I'll try to be here on 21 to say you goodbye properly but if I can't I need to already say you THANK YOU for all that you did for me and this community.

Wish you peace.

Love & hugs

 

[Tired_Tired]

Wish you good luck this time.

 

[sourpink]

I've seen several of your comments and must say I enjoy your perspective and input round these parts. if all goes as I'd like, I'll be heading out soon after you.
so, rejoice for now, because nobody's making it out alive. at least we have some comfort in this space. hopefully your departure is smooth and you can find whatever peace you might want.

 

[Sakura94]

Panic attacks are the worst, any last shot at medicating it? Sad to see you go.

 

[Rockman]

Nice to met you matt. Hope your plans work.

 

[WornOutLife]

Panic attacks are the worst, any last shot at medicating it? Sad to see you go.

I'm actually having 3 different pills: lamotrigine, risperidona and lorazepam. They only help me to get some sleep. That's it. :(

 

[sourpink]

I'm actually having 3 different pills: lamotrigine, risperidona and lorazepam. They only help me to get some sleep. That's it. :(

I've been on all of those. Lamictal was a nope. risperidone was another no. but Ativan.... I love benzos. but I'm at a point in my tolerance where my prescribed dose does jack shit. I usually have multiple panic attacks daily. solidarity, friend. and strength in your last weeks.

 

[Nitup]

I'm actually having 3 different pills: lamotrigine, risperidona and lorazepam. They only help me to get some sleep. That's it. :(

I know too well the last 2.. Risperidona caused me a stroke at the age of 20.
I agree with you that beside making you sleeping awake they're not of a great help.. :/

 

[Pookie]

I wish things could turn out differently for you so that you don't have to ctb. But we'll be here to support you whether you decide to go through with it on that date or not. You seem like a sweet and kind person so it's always sad when the world loses good souls like you.

 

[Life sucks]

I wish you peace and no suffering

 

[Defenestration]

hi, say your plaification please

sn with propanolol, antiemetic,antiacid?how dosage

say please....

 

[TowerUpright]

Best wishes to you. You are always welcome back, if you change your mind.

Regardless, peace be with you.

 

[NightmareTour]

You'll be missed a lot, you're a really nice person and lots of fun to talk to. I hope we'll get to see a lot more of you in chat before then, and I really wish things could have been better for you.

 

[Ghost2211]

You'll be missed, and it's lovely to have met you. We will be sure to make the most of the next couple weeks, and if you ever want talk or need support you can always reach out.

 

[NeverSatisfied]

Whether or not the 21st is your time we'll be here for you like you've been for us. As others have said, you're an amazing person and I wish things could've gone better for you.

 

[VtubersAreMyLife]

I'm gonna miss you.
Hopefully you'll finally find the peace you deserve.
If I don't ctb before you, I'll definitely be there for you on the day you decide to ctb .

 

[Nymph]

Aw im gonna miss you, I liked your posts and you seem like a cool person

 

[shadowchaser]

I was so sad to see your name with this thread :(

I don't think we've talked directly but I see you around on here and you're always such a calming, familiar presence.

I'm so sorry you've been having a rough couple of days. We love you and are here to support you in any way we possibly can; just send word to us if you need <3

You are a wonderful person. Whatever the outcome, whatever you decide or what happens to happen, I wish you nothing but the best

 

[it's_all_a_game]

Goodbye, you seem like a swell dude, I'll miss ya :(

 

[Fehler]

You too partner? I thought we would last longer
Enjoy the time you have and if things go well and you think you can postpone the date, you know ;)

 

[Amumu]

My thoughts will be with you, my friend.