They gave me everything since I was a child. Everything so I could be happy. Toys, travels, videogames, and so on. They did their best for me so I could be the happiest child on earth and I am thinking of killing myself everyday and it makes me sad for them. I'm not sad for me. I am living for my family because they love me so much. But I'm already dead inside.
Iamnotperminant92
Alien visitor
- May 4, 2020
- 54
I am in a similar boat. My mother did what she could and still does. I wish my consciousness/soul could go but my body could stay around and support her like a golem. Ultimately it's up to us to live (or die) for us though. I've thought about alternatives to just CTBing (voluntary homelessness and heading south, or joining a monastery) but those are just the same thing in a sense. I'm already dead in a way but mostly restless. CTB just seems like the only straightforward war and bd honestd way out.
Squiddy
Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
- Sep 4, 2019
- 5,903
That's one thing keeping me here right now. If I ctb, it would kill my family
Cancún
Experienced
- Apr 20, 2020
- 216
DeathNoot
Student
- Feb 19, 2020
- 137
It's my reason for still being around as well, if I still feel like this when they die than I'm a goner for sure
Moreofthesamepain
Member
- Apr 25, 2020
- 40
Huntfish34
Enlightened
- Mar 13, 2020
- 1,622
Same for me..... Family and friends, I believe it could possibly destroy them. Sadly. =/
Nolye
The hardest battles are fought in the mind.
- May 3, 2020
- 74
I'm in the same boat. My parents are very much like yours. They're the only reason I'm still here, and ctb would literally destroy them. But I know my time is running out.
I've got nothing left to lose. Reality hurts. Society sucks. And I'm tired of being with the only person I'm all the time: myself.
Existence: Suffering
Non-Existence: No Suffering
Existence: Suffering
Non-Existence: No Suffering
