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T

Thatdude

Life is temporary, death is permanent
Sep 26, 2019
482
It feels like I'm on my last few years of my life. My entire childhood is pretty much gone over the past 2 or 3 years, I have been miserable and suicidal even when I was in middle school, most of my family has nothing to do with me for reasons that are out of my control and not my fault, if it wasn't for my parents I would've been homeless for some time now, I don't really have a reason to keep living, I feel completely empty inside like what I wanted from life will never happen, I'm disappointed with society in general were nearly everyone lives to work and they make their job their identity vs working to do the things they want, to get in a better life it requires a lot of luck that I simply don't have, one of the major reasons that kept me from offing myself died a few months back

It feels like I'm basically on the last bit of my hell of a life, but at the same time it is hard to just throw my hands in the air and say I'm done. Like in the back of my mind it feels like there is always something I can try. Hell, I got into crypto mining due to this and while it is good hobby money. It isn't economically going to pull me out of this situation. I even got into 3D printing a while back because maybe if I did it then I could make a company that will get me there. I even made business tools that the 3D community still uses today. But it was another clawing the wall for any chance of a better life.
I wish there was an easy way to quit, and officerly give up before I die. that away I can be happy in the last few years of my life in doing little things that makes me happy like playing video games, spending time with the dogs, and so on.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
44,318
This life can be very depressing, and unfair, I also see no reason to continue living, I exist for the sake of existing. I can imagine that it must be awful being unable to live the life that you want. I wish you the best in whatever you decide to do.
 

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