“It gets better”

[Funeralprincess]

I've noticed the people who say "it gets better" are the people in the rare circumstances that actually did get better. They found a new partner, got a better job, blah blah blah. My issue is they seem to think that that will happen to every single person who wants to end their life. Me getting closer to death has actually opened my eyes even more to how selfish and stupid a lot of human beings are. I couldn't imagine living in a bubble and thinking that everyone else can have the same bubble I do if they just "wait and see". There have been people who did the whole "wait and see" thing only to become 40 years old and realize they just suffered extra years for no reason lol. I personally don't want to be like that, and I have a strong feeling would end up that way if I chose to keep being alive.

I remember speaking to this one woman who believed the lie "it gets better". She's now 33 and her life actually got worse and she now has health issues whereas had she killed herself earlier it would've been a lot easier than how it is now. I really wouldn't want to get older and just keep pretending a magical change will develop like the rare percentage of people it happened to claim.

I think those people fail to realize not everyone has that type of time to wait and see if the magical thing happens. Many of us are already suffering so much that it causes pain, and the idea of waiting to see if magic happens is terrifying for us, not to mention some of us have chronic health issues on top of the mental ones.

 

[Darkover]

everyone says it gets better but it's just not ture for everyone my life as just been one disaster after another not worth coming alive for by any stretch of the imagination

 

[Klophy]

I'm one of the ones who fell for it, used to watch all these YouTube videos and talk to other people who turned their life around.

They completed their objective, I stuck around, I wish I didn't.

Just went through more shit as the years went by.

 

[FuneralCry]

I cannot stand toxic positivity personally. I think that many people do not want to face the fact that things do not always improve for everyone and that things are likely to actually get worse instead as it would shatter their delusion that life is always worth living. Saying things like that can lead to false hope which just means that people suffer more when that hope is taken away.

I think that it is best to be realistic instead. After all we live in a world where so much pain exists and things can easily get worse. If someone has no evidence that things will actually get better then they should not say it. I wish that we lived in a world where people acknowledged how hopeless things are for many people and that wanting suicide can be perfectly rational. For me, non existence will always be preferable to life as it is the absence of suffering.

 

[FML_]

Yeah... They don't even know what it's like. Stopping to believe the lies is so freeing

 

[8evergo]

it doesn't get better bad that IS the law of nature that you can see on our bodies as you get older you lose your eyesight and so much more i'm getting older and my problems are increasing i regret that i didn't kill myself sooner

 

[Funeralprincess]

I cannot stand toxic positivity personally. I think that many people do not want to face the fact that things do not always improve for everyone and that things are likely to actually get worse instead as it would shatter their delusion that life is always worth living. Saying things like that can lead to false hope which just means that people suffer more when that hope is taken away.

I think that it is best to be realistic instead. After all we live in a world where so much pain exists and things can easily get worse. If someone has no evidence that things will actually get better then they should not say it. I wish that we lived in a world where people acknowledged how hopeless things are for many people and that wanting suicide can be perfectly rational. For me, non existence will always be preferable to life as it is the absence of suffering.

I agree with you. Toxic positivity can lead to so much suffering and agony. I don't want to be old still holding on to hope. These people who push toxic positivity got lucky in life to have a second chance again… not everybody can be that fortunate and they fail to a acknowledge their ability to have good in their life again was purely luck and being at the right place during the right time. We all can sit here hoping for that luck to strike us because it almost always passes us by. I know I'm better off dead

it doesn't get better bad that IS the law of nature that you can see on our bodies as you get older you lose your eyesight and so much more i'm getting older and my problems are increasing i regret that i didn't kill myself sooner

This is my biggest thing right here. Thank you as an older person, for keeping it real. I'm 25, but I know for sure I don't want to be old trying to die… I would rather die young than ever have to die old because I stupidly believed in waiting and hoping for the right thing to happen to me. I can't make it another year and when I hear toxic positivity it gets in my head and makes shit worse

 

[nosurpries]

pro lifers will say anything to make sure everyone else suffers just as much (or more) as they do.

 

[8evergo]

good decision do it with your friend i should have ended it much sooner

 

[Hurt]

The it gets better doesnt work for me. If it worked I would be trying to improve my life :\ but I am not OK and never will

 

[whatstheporpoise15]

I feel like these are the same people who talk about how they sometimes struggle with their mental health but run marathons and drink tea and it all works out. Like, no, I was medicated as a kid and my brain has been permanently changed because of that, and now I have to deal with this for the rest of my life.

 

[Slimetae]

Yea personally in my experience shit never got better and still is bad since I been a kid never got a chance at a decent life made poor decisions and went through shit that pretty much ruined any chance of me having a decent life .

 

[blue_muse]

It doesn't always get better. I think normal types should shift their idea that, "If I can go through a, b or c, then anyone else can get through said circumstances". There's an inherent bias within survival stories. We do not all experience a better quality of life, as a result of one to several lifestyle changes.

 

[8evergo]

it's very hard to take ctb have tried 3 now damn alone i can't do it im cursed to live

 

[redeyepiranha]

Haha I told myself 2 years ago "It will get better"and now I'm planning my suicide. So things got better?

 

[chloramine]

I think the possibility does always exist for things to get better, but that doesn't mean it will. Sure there's always a chance things will improve- waiting for that or trying to make it happen is a risk though. Things could also get worse or stay the same. The person taking the risk gets to choose whether the pros are worth the cons (or at least they should get to)

 

[Funeralprincess]

pro lifers will say anything to make sure everyone else suffers just as much (or more) as they do.

They absolutely do.

good decision do it with your friend i should have ended it much sooner

That's what everyone says is that they wish they'd done it sooner when they were younger. I want to go so badly

I feel like these are the same people who talk about how they sometimes struggle with their mental health but run marathons and drink tea and it all works out. Like, no, I was medicated as a kid and my brain has been permanently changed because of that, and now I have to deal with this for the rest of my life.

Exactly. They don't realize some mental health can be disabling

Yea personally in my experience shit never got better and still is bad since I been a kid never got a chance at a decent life made poor decisions and went through shit that pretty much ruined any chance of me having a decent life .

Same. Because of my mental illness, I ruined everything good that I had in life

 

[OpheliasFlowers]

I hate that platitude. It's as revolting and thoughtless to me as the old chestnut "permanent solution to a temporary problem" (I'm sure most of us are familiar with that one...)

For literally many decades I clung to the hope and 'belief' of "it gets better", not even because I honestly thought it would logically speaking but because there was some part of me, deep down, that DID believe some magical, wonderful change would happen for me and my life would get better, somehow. But it never did. I only got sicker, poorer, more isolated, lost my mother who was really my only friend and person who (as much as she was able to) 'understood' me, and went through countless miserable, horrible experiences one after another, all the while waiting waiting waiting for "things to get better". I see now how dumb I was. There are lucky people out there who, for them, situations and life gets better, but I am not one of them and now I'm mid-50s and there's no way anything is going to get better, especially my health which even if other aspects of my life improved, my health would be the reason everything would still be hellish.

It's too bad some people are simply too ignorant to understand or grasp the reality that just because things got better FOR THEM, that same truth applies to everyone else. Nope. Some people's lives just are not going to ever 'get better'.

 

[8evergo]

I hate that platitude. It's as revolting and thoughtless to me as the old chestnut "permanent solution to a temporary problem" (I'm sure most of us are familiar with that one...)

For literally many decades I clung to the hope and 'belief' of "it gets better", not even because I honestly thought it would logically speaking but because there was some part of me, deep down, that DID believe some magical, wonderful change would happen for me and my life would get better, somehow. But it never did. I only got sicker, poorer, more isolated, lost my mother who was really my only friend and person who (as much as she was able to) 'understood' me, and went through countless miserable, horrible experiences one after another, all the while waiting waiting waiting for "things to get better". I see now how dumb I was. There are lucky people out there who, for them, situations and life gets better, but I am not one of them and now I'm mid-50s and there's no way anything is going to get better, especially my health which even if other aspects of my life improved, my health would be the reason everything would still be hellish.

It's too bad some people are simply too ignorant to understand or grasp the reality that just because things got better FOR THEM, that same truth applies to everyone else. Nope. Some people's lives just are not going to ever 'get better'.

you are so right it is the way it is
it's really like you think it's going to get better, but it's not, not only are the problems increasing, but your health is getting worse and worse

 

[Squiddy]

It gets annoying when people say that. Like how do you know it'll get better? No where in life does it say it'll get better. It could get worse and stay worse.

So far, I haven't had any luck with my life improving

 

[8evergo]

from the beginning of 33 everything slowly goes down the drain that's how life seems to me

 

[Euthanza]

It's the lies they told to every children lacking of critical thinking, we're fed with false hope until our brain fully developed in our 20s-40s.
Realities are 99% opposite of wishful thinking.

 

[LunaNyx_]

I'm already set on killing myself before my 25th bday, but I am also simultaneously engaging in something I like to call "If it gets better, show me it does, dickhead".

Basically, humoring these people (and humoring myself) by watching them scramble to keep me from killing myself. It's endlessly entertaining.

 

[Funeralprincess]

I am trying to die before my 26th so I understand that haha. Yes they never can provide proof that life will be better for us

 

[8evergo]

It better when I die

 

[LunaNyx_]

I am trying to die before my 26th so I understand that haha. Yes they never can provide proof that life will be better for us

You know... I had a lot of hopes for my life... That we're quickly squandered by reality.

Welp, at least fiction has helped me fulfill those in a sense. It's lead to me being at peace with death. There's nothing EARTHLY that can keep me here. If there was it'd have appeared by now.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

There have been people who did the whole "wait and see" thing only to become 40 years old and realize they just suffered extra years for no reason lol.

I must have really suffered a lot longer than I needed to then since I'm in my mid fifties. In actuality, I think we all 'hang around" for different reasons. Mine wasn't because I thought things might get better. I knew better than that.

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

It's all lies to keep us here doing shit jobs for the rich.
Toxic Positivity... That is one I don't remember hearing before. Made me
Thank you @FuneralCry .... I needed that.
You only hear the success stories of people who made it out of hell and have a better life.
The rest are forgotten. Sure, they may do stories about homeless or mentally ill, but we are never remembered 5 seconds later. Unless we do a mass shooting at a school. Most of those aren't remembered either.
@Squiddy .... Seems like we've been here forever. It's comforting to see you here and sad at the same time.
Sorry for getting emotional. I was hoping that you would be able to make it out of here. Not that I don't want that for all of us.
They say "Pull yourself up by your bootstraps" ... I say back.... Only if they are around my neck.... Oops ... Slipped.

 

[Squiddy]

It's all lies to keep us here doing shit jobs for the rich.
Toxic Positivity... That is one I don't remember hearing before. Made me
Thank you @FuneralCry .... I needed that.
You only hear the success stories of people who made it out of hell and have a better life.
The rest are forgotten. Sure, they may do stories about homeless or mentally ill, but we are never remembered 5 seconds later. Unless we do a mass shooting at a school. Most of those aren't remembered either.
@Squiddy .... Seems like we've been here forever. It's comforting to see you here and sad at the same time.
Sorry for getting emotional. I was hoping that you would be able to make it out of here. Not that I don't want that for all of us.
They say "Pull yourself up by your bootstraps" ... I say back.... Only if they are around my neck.... Oops ... Slipped.

It's comforting to see you too and I'm sorry you haven't been able to make it out of here

 

[Funeralprincess]

It's all lies to keep us here doing shit jobs for the rich.
Toxic Positivity... That is one I don't remember hearing before. Made me
Thank you @FuneralCry .... I needed that.
You only hear the success stories of people who made it out of hell and have a better life.
The rest are forgotten. Sure, they may do stories about homeless or mentally ill, but we are never remembered 5 seconds later. Unless we do a mass shooting at a school. Most of those aren't remembered either.
@Squiddy .... Seems like we've been here forever. It's comforting to see you here and sad at the same time.
Sorry for getting emotional. I was hoping that you would be able to make it out of here. Not that I don't want that for all of us.
They say "Pull yourself up by your bootstraps" ... I say back.... Only if they are around my neck.... Oops ... Slipped.

Wow we are only remembered if we shoot up a school… those words are chilling because they're true. The kids who have done that were mentally not okay and I bet until they hurt others they were bullied and cast aside. We aren't ever loved or cared for when we simply exist with our mental issues, and yes we only hear the success stories and those people tend to just have good luck. Most of us don't have that