Discussion It doesn't hurt anymore.

[Require_love]

It doesn't hurt anymore when I socialize. I don't feel abandoned and worthless anymore. Is this recovery? Or am I just too jaded to care anymore?

I asked because they actually behaved in a shit way, but I never felt hurt, even after realising it. I just sort of.....let go. Usually I'd bawl, do some SH and SI, and sleep.

When I do SH, it feels even more rewarding. I don't SH on impulse as often anymore, I plan it ahead of time. It's like your favorite sitcom- you plan ahead.

I suppose maturity feels like this. I learnt to let go, and not care so much anymore. I gave them (my friends) a piece of my mind for a shit remark they made about me (I usually wouldn't). It's amazing.

I just realised that I didn't want company as much nowadays. It used to hurt when I thought of having friends, relationships (I daydream a lot), now when I try to do so, nothing comes up. It's like the thoughts fizzle out. Poof, gone.

I don't know if I sound like I'm ranting, I feel this way. I couldn't put it in better words. I don't feel happy yet but I certainly don't feel like I'm the most worthless piece of shit anymore.

 

[alwaysalone]

It doesn't hurt anymore when I socialize. I don't feel abandoned and worthless anymore. Is this recovery? Or am I just too jaded to care anymore?

I asked because they actually behaved in a shit way, but I never felt hurt, even after realising it. I just sort of.....let go. Usually I'd bawl, do some SH and SI, and sleep.

When I do SH, it feels even more rewarding. I don't SH on impulse as often anymore, I plan it ahead of time. It's like your favorite sitcom- you plan ahead.

I suppose maturity feels like this. I learnt to let go, and not care so much anymore. I gave them (my friends) a piece of my mind for a shit remark they made about me (I usually wouldn't). It's amazing.

I just realised that I didn't want company as much nowadays. It used to hurt when I thought of having friends, relationships (I daydream a lot), now when I try to do so, nothing comes up. It's like the thoughts fizzle out. Poof, gone.

I don't know if I sound like I'm ranting, I feel this way. I couldn't put it in better words. I don't feel happy yet but I certainly don't feel like I'm the most worthless piece of shit anymore.

When you don't value yourself based on what other people think or say that's definitely maturity.

 

[misty]

I am so sorry that people are acting shitty towards you, but I am so happy that you didn't let it affect you (they dont deserve your time anyway!) any progress towards recovery is good progress :) you got this!!