It's a great question and something I think about too. If I'm here for a mission I'll be damned if I can figure it out, no pun intended. For what? To be born to shitty, abusive unloving parents? To struggle with physical and mental health problems? To miss out on all of life's milestones, like marriage, kids, buying a home, etc, because of said problems? Many of which are tied to horrible trauma. Yes, I still worry about being sent to a burning lake of sulfur where there's weeping and gnashing of teeth for all eternity by a vengeful god for having the audacity to leave this paradise a little early. You're definitely not alone.