I also have BPD. Asking if suicide is the only way out for someone with BPD is a very BPD thing to say, because most people with the disease are chronically suicidal - that's one of the symptoms.
As someone with this disease, I'm going to be brutally honest. You're most likely going to be BPD until you die. People can and do recover from this disease and stop being BPD anymore, which is awesome, but it's rare. Realistically speaking, you would need a GOOD therapist experienced and knowledgable in providing DBT therapy. And that is not cheap. Few insurance plans cover it in the USA, and if you do have insurance that covers it or enough money, finding a therapist might be a challenge, because therapists qualified to administer this therapy are rare, so you might have to relocate just to find one.
Not trying to discourage you, just giving you the facts. There is hope to be cured by DBT, which is fucking awesome because most mental disorders cannot be cured, BPD is one of the few that can. But to be truly cured, you would need a therapist. You can buy the book and learn DBT self coping skills, which helps, but you can not administer the core therapy to yourself, a therapist is REQUIRED. It is designed from the ground up to be administered by a therapist.
I know how hard it is to cope with this disease, what it means to be at war with yourself. When you have BPD, that means your personality is broken at it's core. The way I cope is by not forming close relationships, and a lot of alcohol and drugs. Weed helps the most but now I'm on probation and cant smoke it, which is craziness. Weed could probably save my life right now, but i would go to jail if i pissed dirty, guess I'll just kill myself.
In a romantic relationship, I am extremely abusive, so I refuse to ever form another one. It sucks, BPD people are known as being the worst people to form relationships with, because we are toxic. Sucks being toxic. I got PURE EVIL tattooed on my knuckles and pennywise the clown tattooed on my hand so people will know I'm toxic. Should you kill yourself? I don't know. But for me, self destruction is all I desire.
