I've said this before but it's not like you can take any of your experiences with you.
So if you hang around to watch a few more sunsets, you can't take those visuals with you. There's no difference in dying today or 3 years from now.
Unless you're on the verge of a scientific breakthrough, you're paying for someone's education expenses or you're waiting to receive your settlement in a lawsuit - what the hell is really gonna change between now and whenever you'd die naturally?
Dying sooner just saves you some heartache and struggle.
The absence of those things is far more impactful than the presence of a sunset or a bird chirping or whatever.
This is something i think as well.
I asked my friends (the ones without depression, or recovering from it) why they wanna live so much. Because what is the point if in the end we are going to die anyway? So you KNOW you are going to die regardless of what you do on earth. If you became a doctor, watched the sunset and went to the beach... amazing memories, ofc, but what's the point?
I said "i don't even like living. Yeah, some part of life is good, maybe 30%, and this is me being generous. The rest is work again and again. So we should we stay here? Isn't easier dying?"
This is something that's set in on my mind. "Dying isn't easy, but living is so much harder". To overcome your survival instincts... yeah, that's shit tough. But living? man....
Anyway... they answered "it's exactly because of that. We only have one life. And i already know whats in the end of the journey. So i want to enjoy the ride". And my question was, "but what about when you can't enjoy the ride? What to do when even the pointless part of the ride it sucks?". They said my perceptions were tainted by depression. I asked "how do you know? What if this is the real me? That see the world how it really is? I'm not denying my mental illness, but let's consider for an instant that's not the depression, this is me, my brain, so what? So what there isn't a cure for this terrible feeling?" their answer was that they could know it wasn't me, because our brain it's a survivalist, and in the moment your brain wants to die, there's something wrong, since it's not a behavior very evolution like lol
I started asking myself "well, that idea kinda implies that a person can never chose suicide consciously", which i personally disagree. In my case i do have severe depression and it gets more tiring each day to fight it, but whatever...
Everything just makes me wonder how these people out there do it. I ask myself all the time. Why they wanna live SO much? I still don't get it.
Life isn't terrible. But it isn't this piece of joy some people make out to be either. It's just life.