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N

noname223

Angelic
Aug 18, 2020
4,676
This question is similar to the question "Is suicide rational?" or "Can suicide be rational?". Hence I post it here in the suicide discussion sub-forum.

SaSu is a website full of people in extreme pain and existential suffering. When most people describe things that are good for their soul they say for example they spend time outside, seeing the sun shining, doing sports (which has an anti-depressive effect), playing games with their friends, watching a movie and stuff like that.

In contrast this forum is inter alia about killing oneself. Plans on how to do it. Explicit descriptions of abuse and neglect. People in extreme soulcrushing and never ending pain. It documents the lives and deaths of people who would have deserved a happy end but never received it.
So why are so many of us visiting this forum every single day? Is it simply an addiction of misery porn? Is it like a spirale one cannot get out of? The answer to this question probably depends on the individual.

Many so called "suicide experts" (by the media) say how damaging a community like this one was. However, as you can see in the wikipedia article of this forum the stance is way more heterogenous than in the articles about this forum. Actually there is not much research on forums like this one.

The question emerges whether we just enjoy self-destruction and hence we visit this forum. We might want to corner ourselves. This is just a hypothesis. It might apply to some people. I doubt this applies to the majority and certainly not on me. I just want start with some controversial statements. I am not sure whether my next points should be universal or applied to my individual case to deal with this forum. Maybe both.

I think most people come here for the methods. I think my motivation was finding methods at first (4 years ago). If you are chronically suicidal for a very long time the notion to commit suicide can be cathartic. Personally, I imagine every single day to commit suicide. It gives me the strength to go on wqith fighting. I am in a lot of pain. I feel cornered as fuck. And I really really hate that feeling. I am a control freak. I cannot stand to be with my back against the wall. Imagining suicide makes me calm. It makes it more endurable the feeling of being in so much pain with no end in sight..

Many people who have chronic suicidal thoughts will never commit suicide. Sometimes even the knowledge of being able to cease one's existence can make pain bearable. For many suicidal thoughts keep mostly passive and only sometimes acute. From my personal experience I have to say people usually don't commit suicide lightly. There has to be immense pain over a very long time period so people overcome their survival instinct usually.

Being suicidal makes me so fucking lonely. And talking about my pain feels like self-care. I don't agree with some people on here who claim suicide itself was self-care. For me such a statement is simply insane and nothing else. There are some fringe extreme people in this community with whom I certainly don't agree with. But there are also many people like me who have a biography of abuse and persisting unbearable pain with barely any relief. It feels good the knowledge of not being alone with it. It is so hard to talk in real life about suicide. Most people feel overburdened or don't know how to act and don't know what to say if they are confronted with it. Especially if the person is a very severe case.

I think it is good to be careful posting on here. There are bad apples and you should always monitor yourself whether being on here makes you feel more depressed. At the same time this forum is so unique. I have the feeling the average Joe and Jane does not give a fuck about people like me. They say their platitudes to feel morally superior. I love the following recent post of a forum member on trauma dumping.

A very convenient get out of jail free card for people who don't have the balls to tell you that they just don't give a shit about your problems, and that they want you to shut up. This armchair psychology mumbo jumbo is emerging as yet another social construct to further shun the already alienated mentally ill. Now people like you and I can be likened to cold-blooded abusers for misreading social cues or needing a listening ear after years of agony and trauma. Such a lifesaver for your average Joe, whose life is so good that he can't bare to fathom a life worse than his, lest he be a "victim" to your cries for help. Isn't that so lovely?

God I fucking despise these Gen Z pseudo-intellectual buzzwords. I feel like this modern attitude of indifference and "not owing anyone anything" is a huge factor in these skyrocketing depression and suicide rates. The youth have turned being there for your fellow man into a bad thing. Compassion? That's "toxic" and "codependent" now. Welcome to the new age, the Roaring Twenties. Leave your humanity at the door.

Nowadays, most people want to be seen as aware of societal ills but when it comes to sacrificing parts your own comfort for others they find lame excuses. The society is so hypocritial when it comes to suicide. I feel so much more understood being on here. Suicidality is a unique experience and most people cannot relate to it. For example how it feels of not being taking serious. The pressure of family memebers. Disrespectful replies of others. Lack of support. Cynical actions of politicians who want to be seen as defenders of vulnerable people while giving no fuck at all.

Browsing SaSu is for me a huge coping skill. It helps me to survive. And it helps to stomach all of the insane pain I am exposed to every single day. Many on here are very reasonable people. There is a lot of compassion and understanding. You cannot say that about most other corners of the internet. It is a skill for me of not committing suicide for me instead I post here about my pain. SaSu is never closed. Except when it gets ddosed but that's not the fault of the forum. Two therapists gave me up when i was fully honest about the extent of my daily suicidality and torment. It hurt like hell that feeling. And SaSu was there for me. The vast majority of members never judged me. I get compliments for my eloquence. Posting on here distracts me from my misery for a while. Posting on here gives me some meaning.

Real life interactions overburden me very quickly and can trigger me. It is very hard to find as severe cases as me when it comes to my desperation. I am probably a red flag when I am fully honest about my pain for many. I was in an acute clinic recently and I talked to many suicidal people. Some attempted recently. But my situation was from the longterm perspective comparitively the most hopeless one. The other suicidal people acted mostly out of impulse. Some were very critical of assisted suicide for mentally ill people. They were more ambivalent. They still had hope. They still had opportunities.
Me instead I am in this prison for so long. The staff members believed me when I said my consideration to kill myself is very rational. My life quality is horrendous for such a long time. The prospects to improve don't look good at all. It is very likely it gets way worse. For example when my parents die. I am going to commit suicide when that happens. Probably or maybe even way before. I am close to my limit. The clinic stay helped but I don't have much options anymore. I am running out of it.

My conclusion is browsing SaSu is very rational for me. It improves my life quality overall and it gives me the knowledge to end my life when I reach my limit eventually. However, I noticed that I need a time limit browsing on here. Spending the whole day on SaSu is not good for me. For me it depends on the dosage and some rules of not getting too atttached to others. I have the feeling the thread is rather mediocre. I posted so much I don't want to sound repetitive and redundant. Not being alone comforts my soul so fucking much. I can still remember how alienated I felt after my therapists gave me up. The loneliness was so soulcrushing. I never want to return to that state.
 
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U

unabletocope

I'd like to shut down
Mar 13, 2024
728
It's an outlet for suicide. Sometimes pursuing that is a healthy thing, sometimes it is not. Better it exists than to suppress it I think.
 
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mengbao

mengbao

Member
May 28, 2024
19
It's an outlet for suicide. Sometimes pursuing that is a healthy thing, sometimes it is not. Better it exists than to suppress it I think.
Yes, why keep it hidden it can help instead of being put in a crazy home.
 
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F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
8,128
I definitely think it's highly rational to do research on suicide methods and I agree with you- I think that's what brings the majority of people to the site in the first place.

Beyond that, I applied for membership within minutes because there were so many interesting conversations going on about the really big stuff in life. Plus, almost no holds barred on how negative (and honest) you can be.

As to whether it's rational or even good for mental health to spend a lot of time here. Unsure really. I suspect for a lot of us, this place reflects how we see the world. There's a certain comfort in having your cynical, negative bias confirmed. Because it's likely only going to be challenged or rejected or attacked in the 'real' world. Misery loves company and all that. I suspect to a lot of us, this place feels like home.

As to whether it could potentially impede someone from 'recovery'- I suppose it's possible. I think most people here are more self aware than they are given credit for though. I've known of quite a few members who have left the forum or, moved over into the recovery section because they felt it would serve their mental health better. I agree with you- I think it's important for all of us to be considering what outside influences have on our state of mind. Very few members leave feeling bitter though. Most are grateful for the kindness they have been shown but maybe they feel the negativity overall is too damaging for them.

I suppose it's in the title really- 'sanctioned'. We all tend to validate one another's negative viewpoints and experiences. Is that such a bad thing though? What good is whitewashing over all that?

I suppose that would be my counter-question really. If it isn't logical to seek out a place where you can be open about how negative you feel about your life and the world and not be challenged, then, what would be the 'logical' thing to do? Or- place to go? Somewhere more preventative and pro-life? That assumes that we're wrong then in feeling so negative about life that we want to end it. Are we? I don't know. It's a tricky subject. I'd argue that we have a right to feel the way we do and it's actually more logical to want to spend time in a place where people actually listen to you and respond thoughtfully- rather than just try and shout you down with platitudes.

I feel somewhat similarly to you in that I don't exactly see suicide as some beautiful thing. I think it's a very sad reflection on the life that person had. As for 'self-care' though- actually, I do kind of see it like that. I think people do it to either escape from a current painful situation and/or to avoid one in the near future. For me, I see it as a tragic last resort because that person clearly saw no other way of turning things around. It's an act of liberation I suppose but, it's still sad really that there may well not have even been a good alternative.
 
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SilverTiger

SilverTiger

Life is the night, I seek the warmth of the sun.
Apr 18, 2024
106
I think most people come here for the methods. I think my motivation was finding methods at first (4 years ago). If you are chronically suicidal for a very long time the notion to commit suicide can be cathartic. Personally, I imagine every single day to commit suicide. It gives me the strength to go on with fighting. I am in a lot of pain. I feel cornered as fuck. And I really really hate that feeling. I am a control freak. I cannot stand to be with my back against the wall. Imagining suicide makes me calm. It makes it more endurable the feeling of being in so much pain with no end in sight..
Agreed, when things get hard I just say out loud "This will all be over soon" repeatedly.... It is soothing

Being suicidal makes me so fucking lonely. And talking about my pain feels like self-care. I don't agree with some people on here who claim suicide itself was self-care. For me such a statement is simply insane and nothing else. There are some fringe extreme people in this community with whom I certainly don't agree with. But there are also many people like me who have a biography of abuse and persisting unbearable pain with barely any relief. It feels good the knowledge of not being alone with it. It is so hard to talk in real life about suicide. Most people feel overburdened or don't know how to act and don't know what to say if they are confronted with it. Especially if the person is a very severe case.
Agreed, my boyfriend can't deal with it, it feels lonely, being with others makes me feel happy... When I see the suicide statistics, I feel like I have the strength to walk in their shoes!

I think it is good to be careful posting on here. There are bad apples and you should always monitor yourself whether being on here makes you feel more depressed. At the same time this forum is so unique. I have the feeling the average Joe and Jane does not give a fuck about people like me. They say their platitudes to feel morally superior. I love the following recent post of a forum member on trauma dumping.

I am Gen-Z, 1997 born. The first Gen of Gen-Z. I agree, however as you stated, this is some bad apples... Want a taste of something better? See what I have posted on the forum for people. Kindness goes a long way, even if some people abuse it.

Nowadays, most people want to be seen as aware of societal ills but when it comes to sacrificing parts your own comfort for others they find lame excuses. The society is so hypocritial when it comes to suicide. I feel so much more understood being on here. Suicidality is a unique experience and most people cannot relate to it. For example how it feels of not being taking serious. The pressure of family memebers. Disrespectful replies of others. Lack of support. Cynical actions of politicians who want to be seen as defenders of vulnerable people while giving no fuck at all.

Browsing SaSu is for me a huge coping skill. It helps me to survive. And it helps to stomach all of the insane pain I am exposed to every single day. Many on here are very reasonable people. There is a lot of compassion and understanding. You cannot say that about most other corners of the internet. It is a skill for me of not committing suicide for me instead I post here about my pain. SaSu is never closed. Except when it gets ddosed but that's not the fault of the forum. Two therapists gave me up when i was fully honest about the extent of my daily suicidality and torment. It hurt like hell that feeling. And SaSu was there for me. The vast majority of members never judged me. I get compliments for my eloquence. Posting on here distracts me from my misery for a while. Posting on here gives me some meaning.
Then keep posing here more, and people like me will keep reading and digesting what you say, even if we agree, even if we don't agree!
Real life interactions overburden me very quickly and can trigger me. It is very hard to find as severe cases as me when it comes to my desperation. I am probably a red flag when I am fully honest about my pain for many. I was in an acute clinic recently and I talked to many suicidal people. Some attempted recently. But my situation was from the longterm perspective comparitively the most hopeless one. The other suicidal people acted mostly out of impulse. Some were very critical of assisted suicide for mentally ill people. They were more ambivalent. They still had hope. They still had opportunities.
Me instead I am in this prison for so long. The staff members believed me when I said my consideration to kill myself is very rational. My life quality is horrendous for such a long time. The prospects to improve don't look good at all. It is very likely it gets way worse. For example when my parents die. I am going to commit suicide when that happens. Probably or maybe even way before. I am close to my limit. The clinic stay helped but I don't have much options anymore. I am running out of it.
You and I are brothers-in-arms, I plan to die within a year or two after getting to my desired weight.

I liked your post, I have autisim and get distracted easily so it took a few goes to read all the way through but people are right when they say you are eloquent.
 
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Linda

Linda

Member
Jul 30, 2020
1,687
This question is similar to the question "Is suicide rational?" or "Can suicide be rational?". Hence I post it here in the suicide discussion sub-forum.

SaSu is a website full of people in extreme pain and existential suffering. When most people describe things that are good for their soul they say for example they spend time outside, seeing the sun shining, doing sports (which has an anti-depressive effect), playing games with their friends, watching a movie and stuff like that.

In contrast this forum is inter alia about killing oneself. Plans on how to do it. Explicit descriptions of abuse and neglect. People in extreme soulcrushing and never ending pain. It documents the lives and deaths of people who would have deserved a happy end but never received it.
So why are so many of us visiting this forum every single day? Is it simply an addiction of misery porn? Is it like a spirale one cannot get out of? The answer to this question probably depends on the individual.

Many so called "suicide experts" (by the media) say how damaging a community like this one was. However, as you can see in the wikipedia article of this forum the stance is way more heterogenous than in the articles about this forum. Actually there is not much research on forums like this one.

The question emerges whether we just enjoy self-destruction and hence we visit this forum. We might want to corner ourselves. This is just a hypothesis. It might apply to some people. I doubt this applies to the majority and certainly not on me. I just want start with some controversial statements. I am not sure whether my next points should be universal or applied to my individual case to deal with this forum. Maybe both.

I think most people come here for the methods. I think my motivation was finding methods at first (4 years ago). If you are chronically suicidal for a very long time the notion to commit suicide can be cathartic. Personally, I imagine every single day to commit suicide. It gives me the strength to go on wqith fighting. I am in a lot of pain. I feel cornered as fuck. And I really really hate that feeling. I am a control freak. I cannot stand to be with my back against the wall. Imagining suicide makes me calm. It makes it more endurable the feeling of being in so much pain with no end in sight..

Many people who have chronic suicidal thoughts will never commit suicide. Sometimes even the knowledge of being able to cease one's existence can make pain bearable. For many suicidal thoughts keep mostly passive and only sometimes acute. From my personal experience I have to say people usually don't commit suicide lightly. There has to be immense pain over a very long time period so people overcome their survival instinct usually.

Being suicidal makes me so fucking lonely. And talking about my pain feels like self-care. I don't agree with some people on here who claim suicide itself was self-care. For me such a statement is simply insane and nothing else. There are some fringe extreme people in this community with whom I certainly don't agree with. But there are also many people like me who have a biography of abuse and persisting unbearable pain with barely any relief. It feels good the knowledge of not being alone with it. It is so hard to talk in real life about suicide. Most people feel overburdened or don't know how to act and don't know what to say if they are confronted with it. Especially if the person is a very severe case.

I think it is good to be careful posting on here. There are bad apples and you should always monitor yourself whether being on here makes you feel more depressed. At the same time this forum is so unique. I have the feeling the average Joe and Jane does not give a fuck about people like me. They say their platitudes to feel morally superior. I love the following recent post of a forum member on trauma dumping.



Nowadays, most people want to be seen as aware of societal ills but when it comes to sacrificing parts your own comfort for others they find lame excuses. The society is so hypocritial when it comes to suicide. I feel so much more understood being on here. Suicidality is a unique experience and most people cannot relate to it. For example how it feels of not being taking serious. The pressure of family memebers. Disrespectful replies of others. Lack of support. Cynical actions of politicians who want to be seen as defenders of vulnerable people while giving no fuck at all.

Browsing SaSu is for me a huge coping skill. It helps me to survive. And it helps to stomach all of the insane pain I am exposed to every single day. Many on here are very reasonable people. There is a lot of compassion and understanding. You cannot say that about most other corners of the internet. It is a skill for me of not committing suicide for me instead I post here about my pain. SaSu is never closed. Except when it gets ddosed but that's not the fault of the forum. Two therapists gave me up when i was fully honest about the extent of my daily suicidality and torment. It hurt like hell that feeling. And SaSu was there for me. The vast majority of members never judged me. I get compliments for my eloquence. Posting on here distracts me from my misery for a while. Posting on here gives me some meaning.

Real life interactions overburden me very quickly and can trigger me. It is very hard to find as severe cases as me when it comes to my desperation. I am probably a red flag when I am fully honest about my pain for many. I was in an acute clinic recently and I talked to many suicidal people. Some attempted recently. But my situation was from the longterm perspective comparitively the most hopeless one. The other suicidal people acted mostly out of impulse. Some were very critical of assisted suicide for mentally ill people. They were more ambivalent. They still had hope. They still had opportunities.
Me instead I am in this prison for so long. The staff members believed me when I said my consideration to kill myself is very rational. My life quality is horrendous for such a long time. The prospects to improve don't look good at all. It is very likely it gets way worse. For example when my parents die. I am going to commit suicide when that happens. Probably or maybe even way before. I am close to my limit. The clinic stay helped but I don't have much options anymore. I am running out of it.

My conclusion is browsing SaSu is very rational for me. It improves my life quality overall and it gives me the knowledge to end my life when I reach my limit eventually. However, I noticed that I need a time limit browsing on here. Spending the whole day on SaSu is not good for me. For me it depends on the dosage and some rules of not getting too atttached to others. I have the feeling the thread is rather mediocre. I posted so much I don't want to sound repetitive and redundant. Not being alone comforts my soul so fucking much. I can still remember how alienated I felt after my therapists gave me up. The loneliness was so soulcrushing. I never want to return to that state.
"SaSu is a website full of people in extreme pain and existential suffering." It's also a website full of compassion, empathy, emotional support and practical advice. That's why people are here. I have never seen so much compassion and empathy anywhere as I have on this site.
 
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DefinitelyReady

DefinitelyReady

Life is definitely not a song...
Mar 14, 2024
887
This question is similar to the question "Is suicide rational?" or "Can suicide be rational?". Hence I post it here in the suicide discussion sub-forum.

SaSu is a website full of people in extreme pain and existential suffering. When most people describe things that are good for their soul they say for example they spend time outside, seeing the sun shining, doing sports (which has an anti-depressive effect), playing games with their friends, watching a movie and stuff like that.

In contrast this forum is inter alia about killing oneself. Plans on how to do it. Explicit descriptions of abuse and neglect. People in extreme soulcrushing and never ending pain. It documents the lives and deaths of people who would have deserved a happy end but never received it.
So why are so many of us visiting this forum every single day? Is it simply an addiction of misery porn? Is it like a spirale one cannot get out of? The answer to this question probably depends on the individual.

Many so called "suicide experts" (by the media) say how damaging a community like this one was. However, as you can see in the wikipedia article of this forum the stance is way more heterogenous than in the articles about this forum. Actually there is not much research on forums like this one.

The question emerges whether we just enjoy self-destruction and hence we visit this forum. We might want to corner ourselves. This is just a hypothesis. It might apply to some people. I doubt this applies to the majority and certainly not on me. I just want start with some controversial statements. I am not sure whether my next points should be universal or applied to my individual case to deal with this forum. Maybe both.

I think most people come here for the methods. I think my motivation was finding methods at first (4 years ago). If you are chronically suicidal for a very long time the notion to commit suicide can be cathartic. Personally, I imagine every single day to commit suicide. It gives me the strength to go on wqith fighting. I am in a lot of pain. I feel cornered as fuck. And I really really hate that feeling. I am a control freak. I cannot stand to be with my back against the wall. Imagining suicide makes me calm. It makes it more endurable the feeling of being in so much pain with no end in sight..

Many people who have chronic suicidal thoughts will never commit suicide. Sometimes even the knowledge of being able to cease one's existence can make pain bearable. For many suicidal thoughts keep mostly passive and only sometimes acute. From my personal experience I have to say people usually don't commit suicide lightly. There has to be immense pain over a very long time period so people overcome their survival instinct usually.

Being suicidal makes me so fucking lonely. And talking about my pain feels like self-care. I don't agree with some people on here who claim suicide itself was self-care. For me such a statement is simply insane and nothing else. There are some fringe extreme people in this community with whom I certainly don't agree with. But there are also many people like me who have a biography of abuse and persisting unbearable pain with barely any relief. It feels good the knowledge of not being alone with it. It is so hard to talk in real life about suicide. Most people feel overburdened or don't know how to act and don't know what to say if they are confronted with it. Especially if the person is a very severe case.

I think it is good to be careful posting on here. There are bad apples and you should always monitor yourself whether being on here makes you feel more depressed. At the same time this forum is so unique. I have the feeling the average Joe and Jane does not give a fuck about people like me. They say their platitudes to feel morally superior. I love the following recent post of a forum member on trauma dumping.



Nowadays, most people want to be seen as aware of societal ills but when it comes to sacrificing parts your own comfort for others they find lame excuses. The society is so hypocritial when it comes to suicide. I feel so much more understood being on here. Suicidality is a unique experience and most people cannot relate to it. For example how it feels of not being taking serious. The pressure of family memebers. Disrespectful replies of others. Lack of support. Cynical actions of politicians who want to be seen as defenders of vulnerable people while giving no fuck at all.

Browsing SaSu is for me a huge coping skill. It helps me to survive. And it helps to stomach all of the insane pain I am exposed to every single day. Many on here are very reasonable people. There is a lot of compassion and understanding. You cannot say that about most other corners of the internet. It is a skill for me of not committing suicide for me instead I post here about my pain. SaSu is never closed. Except when it gets ddosed but that's not the fault of the forum. Two therapists gave me up when i was fully honest about the extent of my daily suicidality and torment. It hurt like hell that feeling. And SaSu was there for me. The vast majority of members never judged me. I get compliments for my eloquence. Posting on here distracts me from my misery for a while. Posting on here gives me some meaning.

Real life interactions overburden me very quickly and can trigger me. It is very hard to find as severe cases as me when it comes to my desperation. I am probably a red flag when I am fully honest about my pain for many. I was in an acute clinic recently and I talked to many suicidal people. Some attempted recently. But my situation was from the longterm perspective comparitively the most hopeless one. The other suicidal people acted mostly out of impulse. Some were very critical of assisted suicide for mentally ill people. They were more ambivalent. They still had hope. They still had opportunities.
Me instead I am in this prison for so long. The staff members believed me when I said my consideration to kill myself is very rational. My life quality is horrendous for such a long time. The prospects to improve don't look good at all. It is very likely it gets way worse. For example when my parents die. I am going to commit suicide when that happens. Probably or maybe even way before. I am close to my limit. The clinic stay helped but I don't have much options anymore. I am running out of it.

My conclusion is browsing SaSu is very rational for me. It improves my life quality overall and it gives me the knowledge to end my life when I reach my limit eventually. However, I noticed that I need a time limit browsing on here. Spending the whole day on SaSu is not good for me. For me it depends on the dosage and some rules of not getting too atttached to others. I have the feeling the thread is rather mediocre. I posted so much I don't want to sound repetitive and redundant. Not being alone comforts my soul so fucking much. I can still remember how alienated I felt after my therapists gave me up. The loneliness was so soulcrushing. I never want to return to that state.
I'm too tired to read all of this, but unless I'm mistaken, this is vastly different than usual spirit of posts? Is anything different going on in your life?

As to your questions, I think there's a similar amount of reasons we all come here, and then different ones for us as individuals, and then even more so depending on how our lives change.

I've had the same questions for myself. Like am I just being whiny, lazy, and self-indulgent? or am I so defective that only a select amount of people can understand that their life has lost its ability to actually live and the vast majority of people can't comprehend that, unless it's happened to them. I can see that we as a species are social creatures even if we don't want to be, and at the very least come here if we're isolated irl. So there's the lonliness component. The lack of understanding and validity of the masses as irl you're still a pariah and rejected if you talk about your suicidality. So there's the common ground group factor. The same goes for pain. This is kind of one of those unknowable subjects. I've never spoken to people abroad or see so many people wishing for death daily like myself. It's very interesting, albeit extremely sad and unfair. Maybe it just comes down to "misery loves company." Secret suicidal society is what we're reduced to. Awful. There are many who never speak on here, and some who cannot stop speaking so it's this strange dichotomy-paradoxical-lost-vortex in a black hole or something. I don't use media much as it's too overwhelming but this is the strangest place I've seen. Also death by your own hand is looked down upon and still taboo and it's flaunted here for lack of a better word which is refreshing. I like your post. I'll finish it another time.
 
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S

SchizoGymnast

Member
May 28, 2024
56
It's absolutely rational. This is hands down the best support I've ever gotten. No fear of 911 showing up on my doorstep.
 
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Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
20,246
I think it depends on what you use it for. I use it to let off steam and distract myself by wallowing in my own misery which in turn helps me stay alive a little longer without having to burden my irl friends with suspicious messages and incoherent rants in the group chats.

As far as information on suicide methods goes, it's pretty rational for that reason too.
 
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Worndown

Worndown

Visionary
Mar 21, 2019
2,639
If you have questions about anything, research is important. Search away!
 
NoLoveNoHope

NoLoveNoHope

Mage
Mar 25, 2023
554
I think an action without context is very hard if not impossible to justify as irrational. If browsing sasu makes you feel better or helps you improve your life then I'd absolutely say so if not then it's probably time to leave or take a break.

I have heard the phrase "Came for the methods, stayed for the community" many times which in my case would be true. If sasu wasn't a site full of empathy and compassion I would of ctb'd shortly after I was able to. I've met some of the most kindhearted people I've ever had the pleasure of meeting on here and the support really helps me get through just living my day-to-day.

I don't feel any different seeing people's situation being awful personally but for some people I've talked to it affects them nor do I feel different seeing goodbye threads. If I don't know the person it doesn't get to me usually but sometimes sexual abuse / trauma can get to me.

For suicide being self-care I think it depends on the definition of self-care. Assuming death is just nothingness like the time before you were born then suicide prevents all future harm and preventing harm is a good thing just like getting out of an abusive relationship. It does come at the cost of removing your ability to feel pleasure so if by self-care it means maximizing positive feelings then it is not. There would also be middle-ground where you could take the ratio of pleasure vs pain in someones life. If we view a lifes value or worth to live as a number and death being 0 then if someones life is in the negatives then it could realistically be classified as self-care. I think it's up to the person to determine whether it is self-care for them or not though.

I remember seeing a statistic that ~20% feel more comfortable with living if they were prescribed a lethal dosage of medication on a government's euthanasia page but I forgot which one as it was a long time ago. I've seen a few people on here say similar things having SN or N helps them live their lives knowing they aren't trapped or obligated to live. For me knowing that I can end my life if it were to get so bad I could no longer tolerate it is a huge comfort that this site has given me. To get similar results I would need to do hundreds or hours of research just for similar results and doing that while not wanting to live will be a struggle to say the least.
 
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avalonisburning

Womp womp womp
May 12, 2024
36
The reason I browse this forum is because it's the only place I feel like I can be emotionally earnest without being condescended or debated by compulsive fixers and paternalistic know-it-alls.
 
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dinosavr

dinosavr

and if i’m turning blue please don’t save me 🌛
Dec 14, 2023
636
From depression as an illness that one feels the need to recover from, it's irrational and probably causes more harm than good. But to anyone who doesn't really believe in getting better, and to anyone who feels like this is how life looks like anyway, it's 100% fine, in my opinion - after all, everyone wants to feel like they belong somewhere.
 
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totheendofinfinity

totheendofinfinity

Trust in my self righteous suicide
May 26, 2024
48
I have nothing I enjoy anymore, so why not browse sasu. It wouldn't matter what I do, would not be happy.
 
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ImTelling

ImTelling

Sad Doggo
May 27, 2024
143
I'll be honest, I've been a lurker for years. This is my only account but I've been browsing without an account for a long time, jotting down methods and scowering threads for how to do what. It was only during a very horrible situation recently did I bite the bullet and make an account, I needed this bullshit to be heard by someone.

After joining not only do I feel like I'm actually part of some kind of community but I've also been given the type of help and support I've only dreamt my therapists would give me. Of course there's always a possibility that I'll say something or do something that people will not like, no one is 100% agreeable, but until that day I don't see how participating in this forum is bad in any way.

I don't regret making this account. I can be as close to the real me as I can on here. ❤️
 
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UKscotty

Doesn't read PMs
May 20, 2021
2,451
I think so yes. Ironically we are more a place for recovery than death. Not many people here go on to kill themselves.

Most find relief and like minded people.

When you break it down, most of us know intuitively we can very literally be dead 5 minutes from now with little more than a cord, if we want death badly enough.

What we actually want is relief from the mental pain, not death. Talking with others in the same situation is liberating and gives hope that recovery could be possible.

For my belief, anyone who truly believes recovery is not possible has left this life.
 
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Anon1337

Mage
Oct 1, 2018
532
Many people here probably use this place to cope whether they know it or not.
 
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restinpeace2

restinpeace2

Member
May 28, 2024
26
You need to speak on how you're feeling, so this site is beneficial
 
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bunnyhugs

Member
Jun 1, 2024
11
The value of talking about something stigmatized - openly, and in detail - is usually recognized and celebrated as progress in Western society. Except when it comes to suicidal ideation.

Miscarriages, for example. People used to feel the compulsion to be very private about reproductive concerns. And now, with de-stigmatization, folks who have suffered these terrible tragedies can learn they're not alone.

Yes, suicide has some philosophical differences. But the people who are determined to go are going to go, with or without this forum. I personally feel like being here gives me both a healing outlet to discuss something forbidden, and hopefully access to buy supplies to make the act more peaceful should I decide to go.
 
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uniqueusername4

uniqueusername4

Member
Aug 13, 2023
90
I think a lot of people come here in search of methods and end up finding a lot of people who are similar to them. I think it is really healthy to have a community you can talk to safely without the fear of cops being involved. If I could talk to my friends about it, I would but they would call 911.
 
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untothedepths

untothedepths

I am falling I am fading I have lost it all
Mar 20, 2023
445
Is life rational? I say: who cares.
 
K

Kalista

Failed hard to pull the trigger - Now using SN
Feb 5, 2023
256
it is rational. there are just far too many people in the world that see's the idea of suicide as a negative concept so the majority pushes the suffering suicidal individuals down as mentally sick people.

one of the biggest point of this forum is to make it known that your life is your own and if you choose to end it, then so be it. it's absolutely not up to anyone else (government, family, friends, people in this forum..etc) whether you should live or die -- only if you make it so.
you also don't have to be in pain to decide kill yourself either, and comparisons between each others' level of suffering to justify suicide is irrelevant. anything beyond that reasoning is just self-preservation in a world you don't want to live in which is no one else's decision. unless you actually want to continue trying.
which then comes back to the long time message the media has taught generations of people about preventing suicide that reflects even from the suicidal people on here, because you'll hear things like, "do it only as a last resort" or "don't do it, you have a lot to live for." additionally, even the dictionary definition labels it as basically an extreme idea with ways to stop it from happening.
so to reveal that knowledge to people, in this forum, who seeks suicide and methods to act upon is beneficial for self-awareness. to make them realize that this is a real option in life because your life is yours to take.
this is an act towards yourself, not others. you're not trying to kill someone or something else, you're trying to kill yourself. what happens outside of that action is a side-effect.

suicide is a form of self-care because pain and suffering is relieved, doesn't matter whether you like how that sounds or not. i could say im taking care of myself by finally ending everything, instead of sticking around to continuously experience any level suffering. the goal and end result is aligned, except it's permanent so there will no longer be further pain.
the 'mental health community' (a general population whose goal is to recover) just has the monopoly on the word 'self-care.' yet it can be used for the purpose of suicide as well.

being in this forum and participating in it will be a mixed experience depending on your background, beliefs, and/or your goals.
 
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Theresnoescape

Each year feels like 10
May 29, 2024
30
Hi, yes I think so, that's what I've been doing daily for the last couple of months. Just bacame a member a couple of days ago. It's helped me quite a bit really, though not quite sure how I want to ctb yet.
 
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golta

golta

Just wants more company
Apr 14, 2024
133
I think is rational, after all , if you Even tell your psycologist of your suicidal thought they have to call the cops and your family. (At least in my country)
 
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ForgottenAgain

ForgottenAgain

On the rollercoaster of sadness
Oct 17, 2023
658
I think it is rational. I'm personally at a point where I'm not acute suicidal and I'm trying to improve my life on my terms, giving this thing ago yet another try...and I still come here every day.

I initially used SaSu for the methods until I started using it to express how I felt, get help from people in similar situations and also to keep up with people. I read so many posts from so many people, some of them are in my mind and I want to check how they're doing. People also make thought provoking posts which are interesting to me.

I think the community is very rich, people are empathetic, knowledgeable, intelligent. My own psychologist was impressed with the quality of advice I received from this community.
There is no other place with this level of empathy, understanding and knowledge. Even when I have better days, I still like to come here, I feel like it doesn't affect me negatively, just a short visit to keep up with people, see what has been happening.
 
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noname223

Angelic
Aug 18, 2020
4,676
There was a thought I forgot to mention is the following.

I think I am not the only person that feared to get into trouble for being on SaSu. Suicide is in many instances a grey area and the laws are designed to stop people from committing suicide. They should scare people away.

However, I am seriously suicidal since more than a decade. I am close to my pain limit. If I break down again I have to kill myself. For someone like me in severe existential pain it seems to be very rational to do research on suicide methods. The fear of permanent damage stopped me from attempting in the past. I was scared to survive and end up in excruciating pain for the rest of my life maybe as a vegetable. I think this is a very logical consideration. What is worse? The fear of legal punishment or the risk to end up as a vegetable for the rest of your life which could mean 7 decades in agony without relief unable to kill yourself. From this perspective doing research in a very detailed way seems to be very rational. I think this is what stops authorities to crack down on SaSu. We all know there are people in extremely painful situation where committing suicide is a very rational consideration. Which does not mean everyone has to come to the same conclusion experiencing the same circumstances. But in an open society there should be the freedom to choose. Where many people disagree under which conditions should one be able to choose? Are there boundaries or is it fully up to the individual`? Since there is no real regulation (which seems to be wanted) there is a lot of room for the individual. At the same time pressuring it in a certain direction which is wanted be the society. But here I am not sure. The society helps the individual but it depends on the problems and on the country it lives in.

Weighing up the potential legal consequences and the extreme existential pain. Everyone has to decide for themselves. Personally, I doubt German law enforcement comes up to my home one day. Moreover, from the moral perspective I think I have the right to end my life and to inform myself.

It is probably way more intricate than that. But I will end it here.
 
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TheLastBoyOnEarth

Member
Jun 7, 2024
92
For me it's very rational to kill myself. My life has been like a game of chess that got worse and worse for me and I've seen the writing on the wall that I'm not gonna be able to go on, so it's better to give up to avoid suffering for no good reason at all.
 
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bunnydetriment

Member
Jun 8, 2024
17
I think so... it feels like there's not really any solution to my problems, and so it seems like the best alternative to seek out ways to do so
 
alicia

alicia

worn down, and fraying at the edges
Apr 10, 2023
13
I think it can be rational. I came here originally looking for methods, but it's also as much about coping for me than anything else. Most sites make me feel worse than I already do because you're not really allowed to be honest about suicide, so it comes off as fake and deceptive. I don't come here all that often but it's a failsafe for me: I feel less trapped, I guess. Knowing that I have the option if I choose it makes a difference for me
 
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