Discussion Is it ok lo tose virginity to a prostitute?

[Sadbanana]

Look, I might be a rude bitch but I feel like some of your responses are a kind of rude and aren't very good...

They never implied that women don't have their own psych issues to deal with or that they are uncaring monsters, just that they think that their poor mental health has likely contributed in their issues with finding a partner. That's an understandable as most people in general do not want to get with those who have a lot of baggage.

What a fucking weird thing to come after them for. They just said they used to try and talk to as many women in possible, probably because that is just an aspect in trying to find a partner. You kind of have to start somewhere. I mean, I found my bf because I was spending my time interacting a lot with different men online. I don't see how that statement is offensive.

What is that supposed to mean? Is this supposed to be your way of implying what I think you are implying, because if so that is going too fucking far.

While I understand that the way how they phrased it isn't great, I'm pretty sure what they mean by "women being worth it or not" is more in reference to whether or not finding a partner is worth it or not. They are likely trying to communicate that they don't know about if their quest to find romance is truly worth their time in continuing on or not rather than it being them trying to imply that they view women as objects. The phrasing of it is awkward, but it is not enough to draw definitive conclusions on whether or no they view us as objects.


This isn't to say that I completely disagree with you. @Sadbanana , you do clearly have some misogynistic views that you should really work on. This part of your now deleted post really highlights this:


Women do not tend to like guys who happen to have the whole "uh, women have it so easy" type mentality, especially with how dismissive it is towards the struggles that women go through. Along with that, this statement easily applies in the reverse. You could argue that attractive men just need to approach and hit on a woman he likes and he'll probably get with her without much effort, but we rarely see this being brought up. Instead, when talking about issues with finding a partner, it's always "ugh, women have it easy". This ends up highlighting some clear biases you have that you should work on...

Thank you for standing up for me.

I Understand that many women find this "women have it easy narrative" anoying or even offensive. And yes many atractive guys have it just as easy. Honestly I would argue neurotipical people in general are extremely privileged, instead of having to learn social skills from scrach, they have some sort of preinstalled program that does most of the job for them. But I get why you find it anoying. It's like I had a gym partner that would always point out, that because of my genetics I have an unfair advantage, that would be really quite annoying. Mind you, it wouldn't make it any less true.

Imagine your life if your boyfriend would have rejected you together with every guy you find at least a bit desireable, wouldn't feel nice would it, you would be alone, trying to make yourself better for boys, yet even after years of trying it wouldn't yeald any results and you wouldn't even really understand what is wrong with you. All your femele friends would talk all the time about how great time they had with their boyfriends the other day and how much you are missing out and also all the media songs and everything would constantly just put it in your face. Plus some people would think you are femcel and that you hate men and are evil mysandrist, just because you point out any flaw about some guys. Now that's how it fucking feels.

I understand women have their problems, that we guys don't have and I'm not trying to invalidate their struggle.

Now just because I believe women have it easier doesn't mean I dislike them for it. If I were in that position I would also just enjoy it and don't feel guilty about it. It's not women fault at all it works this way. Tbh if I could chose to reset my life and swich my gender I probably just would.

That's the other thing. OP @Sadbanana wants to "save it" for a long-term, loving relationship, but here they are on a forum called "Sanctioned Suicide." Is he planning on CTB or is he planning on staying alive long enough to experience a long-term relationship? It seems to me that what would bother a girl is knowing that you were actively planning on CTB, way, way more than it would to know that your first time was with a sex worker.

I mostly want to do it because I no longer want to take sex so seriously, not as something scarced and special. I think my lack of sex experience doesn't really help me finding relationship. Plus there is a chance that I'll never find this "one". And I don't wanna die a fricking virgin.

When it comes to my suiciality, I think it would go away if I found myslef in a good relationship. And then why should it metter, that I was suicidial in some point of life. If my girlfriend used to be suicidial I wouldn't judge her for it all. And if my girlfriend did judge me for it I she probably wouldn't be worth it anyways.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

Now just because I believe women have it easier doesn't mean I dislike them for it.

See, you are doing it again. Rather than properly evaluating your biases you just double down on them. There are even women on this site who have talked about having issues with finding a partner. To add onto this, even if we were to go by your assumption that mainly attractive women have it easier, that completely ignores the fact that "attractive women" have to put an insane amount of work into their looks to even get to that point in the first place. Along with things, such as diet and exercise, you also have intense skin and hair care routines, mastering makeup skills, shaving and waxing, having to spend hours to even get ready to go, and more to look and maintain your appearance.

And again, the fact that your immediate response was to come after women, immediately downplaying their struggles and claiming that attractive women have it easy foes highlights some clear biases that you have. You need to stop getting defensive and try to work on them. I'm not the only one calling you out for this, so that should already be a red flag.

Imagine your life if your boyfriend would have rejected you together with every guy you find at least a bit desireable, wouldn't feel nice would it, you would be alone, trying to make yourself better for boys, yet even after years of trying it wouldn't yeald any results and you wouldn't even really understand what is wrong with you. All your femele friends would talk all the time about how great time they had with their boyfriends the other day and how much you are missing out and also all the media songs and everything would constantly just put it in your face. Plus some people would think you are femcel and that you hate men and are evil mysandrist, just because you point out any flaw about some guys. Now that's how it fucking feels.

You do realize that a lot of women actually go through this, right? There are literal subreddits filled with women who've gone through that exact thing thing.

 

[Sadbanana]

See, you are doing it again. Rather than properly evaluating your biases you just double down on them. There are even women on this site who have talked about having issues with finding a partner. To add onto this, even if we were to go by your assumption that mainly attractive women have it easier, that completely ignores the fact that "attractive women" have to put an insane amount of work into their looks to even get to that point in the first place. Along with things, such as diet and exercise, you also have intense skin and hair care routines, mastering makeup skills, shaving and waxing, having to spend hours to even get ready to go, and more to look and maintain your appearance.

And again, the fact that your immediate response was to come after women, immediately downplaying their struggles and claiming that attractive women have it easy foes highlights some clear biases that you have. You need to stop getting defensive and try to work on them. I'm not the only one calling you out for this, so that should already be a red flag.

You do realize that a lot of women actually go through this, right? There are literal subreddits filled with women who've gone through that exact thing thing.

Okay you got me, I guess some women do go through similar struggle as me, I'm clearly biased because most of my famale friends or aquientences didn't have them. Althought, I had few female friend that weren't very attractive and struggled in this regard.

I must say thought attractive women (guys too) are very privileged and there is no doubt about it. And don't give me how much work they put into it. I knew many that never exersised or did similar stuff and still looked good. Plus exercise isn't such a hardship, I myself have pretty good phisique and must say it's not easy to maintain, yet it's still nothing compared to looking for girlfriend and deal with rejection.

Maybe what you are trying to say that attractive girls like it when guys pretend just they have it hard, so they can feel better about themselves and complain more. It's probably good advice I admit.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

Maybe what you are trying to say that attractive girls like it when guys pretend just they have it hard, so they can feel better about themselves and complain more. It's probably good advice I admit.

No, I'm not. Women in general don't like it when guys pretend to have it hard. Nobody likes it when anyone pretends to have it hard.