Is ctb an inevitability for you?

[Philip]

Yes, 100 percent.

 

[Fallingsky]

I will defiantly CTB at some point unless an accident or medical emergency takes me first. I got two choices - die or be miserable.

If Dignitas falls thought or takes too long, I'll still CTB.

Hey @worldexplorer, I've seen you mention your intention in using Dignitas in a few threads. Just curious, why go to the cost, trouble and uncertainty of being accepted vs obtaining their same drug yourself on the black market?

 

[littlelungs]

100% inevitable. I've always had some weird feeling that when I die, it's going to be a direct result of something I did. Suicide is by far the most likely way I'm gonna go.

 

[Paulsmith]

Yes it is

 

[worldexploder]

Hey @worldexplorer, I've seen you mention your intention in using Dignitas in a few threads. Just curious, why go to the cost, trouble and uncertainty of being accepted vs obtaining their same drug yourself on the black market?

I have no idea how the black market works. I may have to pay up to 10,000 USD but I can't take that money with me. If Dignitas pulls though, what they will give me is the comfort of a peaceful death under professionals.

 

[onewayroad]

Not at all inevitable for me. If I can find treatment for my mental illness that is effective, I would love to stay. There is so much in this world that I want to experience. But if I can't find treatment that works, there is no way in hell I am going to live another 40-50 years experiencing this.

I want to die now, but it would be stupid to die before I've tried every treatment.

"Suicide is a permanent solution to a short term problem" is total dogshit of the highest order because the person saying it has no idea if the problem is short term or not. I've been dealing with bipolar for 11 fucking years. If the next treatment I try works then yeah, it's a short term problem. But if nothing works, I'll have to deal with it for decades more.

No thanks, at that point I'll just go.

 

[Ranza]

while there is life there will be hope, When we train our conscience, it kisses us while it bites us.

 

[Schopenhauer]

It's inevitable. I've tried to see if life improves. I shouldn't have tried, and I regret it. I hate myself.

 

[onewayroad]

It's inevitable. I've tried to see if life improves. I shouldn't have tried, and I regret it. I hate myself.

It's funny, I know exactly what you mean but I'm the total opposite.

I'm glad I failed to ctb previously because I had a lot of experiences since then that I really value. And now I feel like I can ctb with a sense of completion, having done all the things I've done. I feel satisfied with life, I've satisfied my desire to travel, I've satisfied my desire to have relationships, etc. and so I no longer want any of those things. So now I'm ready to go when the time comes, if that makes sense.

 

[Goldie]

A lot of the time I feel it is inevitable. I feel that it is wearing me down and one day I will succomb to it.

 

[Voldmort]

I'm very determined when I'm not depressed, I get a lot of things with effort, but I really do not want to live the way I am.

 

[Mljonzy]

Yes i have nothing to live for or look forward to it's just over was over years ago. I didn't have a chance i can't stand anything anymore fucking sick of it just want it over with.

 

[Roph]

It is inevitable for me. Time and place are to be determined.

 

[TAW122]

Yes ctb is an inevitability for me, especially given my life circumstances as well as personal values and philosophies. I could get into all the reasons and my life story here, but I won't as that will be a super long post. With that said, nowadays, I'm just enjoying whatever escapism I have until the inevitable and/or when something really hits me hard enough where I just go through with ctb'ing.

I also don't plan on living to an old age and succumbing to an illness. As soon as my body starts deteriorating at a rapid pace and knowing that it won't (likely) get better, that would be a sign for me to ctb before things get much, much worse. I'd rather die on my own terms than to let some illness or disease take me.

 

[Goldie]

Yes i have nothing to live for or look forward to it's just over was over years ago. I didn't have a chance i can't stand anything anymore fucking sick of it just want it over with.

I couldn't agree more, I have had enough too.