Discussion Is anyone else just waiting for things to go wrong enough?

[IfyouareamanWinston]

I'm just waiting for things to go badly enough to finally do it.

I have this slim little glimmer of hope that maybe something will change and go right enough that I don't want to die. Basically I'm just waiting till the bad thing that I know will eventually happen (health issue, fired from job, husband leaves, etc.)to occur so that I can ctb.

When you are just in limbo waiting you don't feel alive anyway so then I have moments of thinking, like what is the point? Staying alive for the <1% chance that something good might happen .

 

[Huntfish34]

I'm right there with you,. Completely understand and agree. I don't Really want to die either,. parts of life can be beautiful and amazing... So I'm basically waiting until something goes horribly wrong. Fml. -.

I wish you the best in whatever may happen.

 

[takemenowpls]

I'm going through the same thing right now. Just waiting for that next bad thing to go wrong. I've been holding on hoping things might stop falling apart and something even just one good thing happens. So you are not alone in feeling this way.

 

[FuneralCry]

The way that you feel is understandable, after all suicide is not easy because of the SI and many of us don't have access to the most peaceful methods so the methods are often difficult to go through with. I believe that many people finally ctb when they get desperate and all that they want is to be gone. When things get much worse for me I will have to find a way to leave no matter what.