Irrational relief with prepared CTB

[keg-ireland]

I have this irrational feeling of relief knowing my method of CTB is ready to be used at anytime. I am giving new meds, mainly Lithium, a few weeks to see if it helps my depression. If not, I can go back to and carry out plan B - the already prepped method of CTB.

Maybe that relief isn't irrational but it just feels if method 1 (new meds) don't bring relief then method 2 (ctb) most definitely will. Do you think it's irrational? Either way my suffering is reduced to a finite time.

 

[FuneralCry]

To me it's very understandable feeling relief, I see nothing irrational about being relieved that one has the option of a way out and as a result they don't feel trapped in this existence, I envy those with a reliable suicide method planned.

 

[UKscotty]

Yeah I think most of us feel the same.

Not many people want to die, we want to get better.

Having a method ready takes away the pressure of having to find and research.

Ironically it allows us to focus on getting well. That's why I don't understand why the wokists hate the site so much. Way more people get better than die.

 

[TheLastBoyOnEarth]

I have my method since a few moths and for some reason I never felt the relief some members write about. There's this fear and I don't know, not doubt, but a sense of tragedy. I wish things wouldn't have turned out this way in the first place. I feel like such a failure. It's complicated.

 

[Linda]

I have this irrational feeling of relief knowing my method of CTB is ready to be used at anytime. I am giving new meds, mainly Lithium, a few weeks to see if it helps my depression. If not, I can go back to and carry out plan B - the already prepped method of CTB.

Maybe that relief isn't irrational but it just feels if method 1 (new meds) don't bring relief then method 2 (ctb) most definitely will. Do you think it's irrational? Either way my suffering is reduced to a finite time.

It makes a lot of sense to me.

 

[LaughingGoat]

Nothing sounds more rational to me than having multiple plans in place for anything in life. Never known someone who regretted being over-prepared.

 

[Forveleth]

It's pretty normal. It's one of the reasons suicidal people appear "happy" shortly before they ctb. They have an "out" and that provides a huge relief to avoiding further suffering. Happy that you're feeling good about your plans!

 

[ThisGameIsOverrated]

I don't think it's irrational, just knowing I have a way out is nice but I'm sure once I finally have the equipment I'll be more relieved

 

[Defenestration]

J'éprouve ce sentiment irrationnel de soulagement sachant que ma méthode de CTB est prête à être utilisée à tout moment. Je donne de nouveaux médicaments, principalement du lithium, pendant quelques semaines pour voir si cela aide ma dépression. Sinon, je peux revenir au plan B et mettre en œuvre la méthode CTB déjà préparée.

Peut-être que ce soulagement n'est pas irrationnel, mais on a simplement l'impression que si la méthode 1 (nouveaux médicaments) n'apporte pas de soulagement, alors la méthode 2 (ctb) le fera très certainement. Pensez-vous que c'est irrationnel ? Quoi qu'il en soit, ma souffrance est réduite à un temps fini.

The same for me...to know that i Can die when and how i want is