Incellular Posts

[Un-]

I truly hate posts like this, that nearly do nothing but enrage and segregate people on this website. Even though the general concensus is for equal treatment, posts specifically like these tend to draw out the worst comments, and behaviours of the members of this forum.

I don't know what it is, but there is an absurd amount of sexism against women here. Of all places, that supposedly promote bodily autonomy, and supposedly supports people irregardless of their differences, this is one of the most rampart displays of hatred, misunderstanding or distaste of (primarily) women I've ever seen.

I don't want to discredit anyone on, perhaps, their bad experiences with women or relationships. It happens, and this website is a place to express your pain in regards to that. But the majority of posts that do, are construed in such a way that invokes controversy, and slanderous things against (primarily) the women of this forum (who have, in most cases, done more for this forum than the aforementioned users have). Not all posts are like this, and posts that happen to be like this may not have that intention at heart, but female users have expressed discomfort, disappointment and disgust at these posts.

I'm not against free speech, and I truly believe people should have the freedom to do wrong things, but there's a certain line to that, of which has been crossed numerous times and I hope I'm not the only member to acknowledge that.

Other than reporting said users and reports, I don't have another solution other than to call it out.

 

[ket]

eventually you just gotta shrug off the random incel now and then.

 

[Noctis]

Totally agree. While not nearly as rampant as the blatant sexism, I've seen an uncomforting amount of racism as well.

 

[goldenvirginia]

Which in a way is saying that it's acceptable. But it isn't. At all.

 

[Anxieyote]

This site is (or was) run by the same people who own Incels.is, correct? There could be some crossover there.

And it's also not difficult to imagine that a lot of incels feel suicidal themselves if they're attributing all of their earthly problems and personal failures onto women in a misguided attempt to figure out why their lives have been so miserable.

 

[Julgran]

I agree in that we shouldn't write things like "It's all women's fault that dating is as it is". I myself have specifically stated - although it's just my opinion - that it's not women's fault. However, there are certain gender dynamics at play today, that probably no one saw coming 50 years ago, which has trapped ut in the situation that we are in.

 

[Interloper]

Only after the NYT article did I know that the site owners were also running an incel site, many of them are suicidal so they probably knew of this site over there. Am not surprised there is a spillover, but besides reporting them I'm not sure what can be done. These guys are one instance where I can also see the use of the 2 way blocking. (but that goes both ways...)

 

[StringPuppet]

I hate posts where the OP is saying how hurt they were by a breakup or being in a bad relationship and some dude invalidates their pain by saying something like "So what? At least you had sex!"

 

[Kobusu]

I'm not sure if there's a neat or easy solution to this problem, but I also think you're right. I don't mind when people go on tirades about their relationships or their woes, we all have issues, but when it starts to turn into hatred or anger with the opposite sex, it becomes a problem. Maybe a few rules should be enforced more strictly? I'm unsure, but I do agree there's a problem.

 

[Bleak]

lol at "incellular" I thought it was some biology term. Everyone forum that I post on has these incel posts that come up from time to time. Don't know what the answer is because most of it straddles the borderline of what would be directly actionable. I hate it because it genuinely sucks to be an incel yet you have some that are so misanthropist and misogynistic, and use incel as their whole identity, that the whole bunch is tarred.

 

[cambrai33]

I'm no fan of labels, call these individuals what you will but the rules are pretty clear, however the Mods can't be everywhere all of the time and I can't begin to imagine how many reports they get in a day.

We can help them out by calling it out for what it is and letting people know it's unacceptable and of course ignoring them, if enough people do it then it becomes a pretty isolating experience very quickly but hopefully it doesn't get to that.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

Which in a way is saying that it's acceptable. But it isn't. At all.

This. It's not acceptable, and hopefully they can learn from that.

Ngl, your post to reaction ratio is amazing (1:100). I don't know want to know why, there's probably an unrelated reason, because I like think that you only post when it's really important, and that's how all of your posts have seemed like to me. Which still makes sense, as you've been here a while.

lol at "incellular" I thought it was some biology term. Everyone forum that I post on has these incel posts that come up from time to time. Don't know what the answer is because most of it straddles the borderline of what would be directly actionable. I hate it because it genuinely sucks to be an incel yet you have some that are so misanthropist and misogynistic, and use incel as their whole identity, that the whole bunch is tarred.

Also this. It's grey area, and it sucks to be an incel. It sucks for everyone here no matter what your situation.

And then we get some who are downright criminal, and are actively inciting women to kill themselves. That's disgusting.

 

[Chinaski]

I'm no fan of labels, call these individuals what you will but the rules are pretty clear, however the Mods can't be everywhere all of the time and I can't begin to imagine how many reports they get in a day.

We can help them out by calling it out for what it is and letting people know it's unacceptable and of course ignoring them, if enough people do it then it becomes a pretty isolating experience very quickly but hopefully it doesn't get to that.

This is fine in theory but l remember when this first crept in here and calling it out for what it is often led to rancid beef, this could be perceived as invalidation, so on so forth. I've replied to these dreadful copypaste threads a few times and found myself in a turgid exchange with someone absolutely incapable of independent thought pretty much every time, it's an absolutely thankless task.

Fwiw this site is, in my opinion, way more tolerant of outright misogyny than it should be, and some of the furiously sexist bullshit spouted on here should be shouted down - l suspect the two-way block will ultimately lead to further echo chambers of this flavour which will not be good for the site as a whole imo.

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

Some examples would be nice. Guess I haven't browsed as much lately, but I can't remember the last time I saw something hateful against women. There was one thread about someone hating sex-havers (men and women), but my memory is shit anyway. Appreciate it if anyone has examples.

 

[Chinaski]

Some examples would be nice. Guess I haven't browsed as much lately, but I can't remember the last time I saw something hateful against women. There was one thread about someone hating sex-havers (men and women), but my memory is shit anyway. Appreciate it if anyone has examples.

Honestly do think at this stage if you need an example presented directly to you perhaps your red line for this is in a different place to mine, which is fair enough l guess. Fwiw I've seen that many instances that it'd actually be unfair to single out one individual user/post.

 

[bed]

been seeing it more and more frequently on here.

This site is (or was) run by the same people who own Incels.is, correct?

yeah, this is correct.

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

Honestly do think at this stage if you need an example presented directly to you perhaps your red line for this is in a different place to mine, which is fair enough l guess. Fwiw I've seen that many instances that it'd actually be unfair to single out one individual user/post.

Slander was mentioned, people talking about wanting to hurt women, threatening women (due to their gender), male supremacist views, etc. I really haven't been paying attention these past months, so that's why I asked to get the info that ppl in the thread have. However, wanting to ban anything that causes people to get uncomfy or is seen by some as "provocative" will turn this forum into Reddit.

I just received word that we had one user saying that he loved to stomp on women's heads. I actually had no idea that things like that were happening.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

been seeing it more and more frequently on here.

yeah, this is correct.

Seems to be getting out of hand ngl. I didn't notice it here when I first joined. Maybe it was always like this.

 

[Kobusu]

I didn't see this when I joined back in October and did nothing but lurk, maybe I just wasn't paying much attention though. I feel like this has become more prominent after the article. Maybe new members are bleeding in from their other ventures after the news broke that they ran both sites? I'm not sure.

 

[aprilshowers]

Plenty of people do not and cannot get laid, but only a pathetic few of them complain so vigorously. Their posts here are a testament to their weakness of character.

 

[Julgran]

Some examples would be nice. Guess I haven't browsed as much lately, but I can't remember the last time I saw something hateful against women. There was one thread about someone hating sex-havers (men and women), but my memory is shit anyway. Appreciate it if anyone has examples.

Some guy was shouting sexist rubbish at Liberty_222 - and also at Elri, I believe - yesterday, and even created his own thread containing their conversation. Luckily, it disappeared quickly.

 

[Chinaski]

Slander was mentioned, people talking about wanting to hurt women, threatening women (due to their gender), male supremacist views, etc. I really haven't been paying attention these past months, so that's why I asked to get the info that ppl in the thread have. However, wanting to ban anything that causes people to get uncomfy or is seen by some as "provocative" will turn this forum into Reddit.

I just received word that we had one user saying that he loved to stomp on women's heads. I actually had no idea that things like that were happening.

I'm not saying we should ban anything, l just think the ugly misogyny needs to be shown the same degree of tolerance that, say, racism would. It goes like this:

OP: man im a virgin, none of the pretty girls want to have sex with me because they are shallow and I am not handsome, women are now in charge, men are persecuted, especially me, like the time I went to a prostitute and even she demanded cash upfront, like why are women so vapid man, no wonder I will ctb

REPLY #1: if this is how you view women your chances of getting a gf will remain slim to zero, regardless of looks - working on this may benefit you more than actual suicide

OP: yet another woke warrior controlled by the libfem media, I bet it's alright for you, l bet you're a nine out of ten for looks and catherine zeta Jones is sucking your dick right now, well watch this YouTube video where WOMAN_SLAYER_69 completely ANNYILATES ur argument with REASON and LOGIC u need 2 open ur mind to what's really going on out there and why it's bad that women can choose who they sleep with

REPLY #2: I don't necessarily agree with the op but this is a suicide forum and all reasons are valid and it is wrong of Reply #1 to make the op feel unwelcome

REPLY #3: (Quotes reply #1) why r u suggestin op not ctb, r u a goddam prolife cocksucker

(repeat to fade, thread inevitably locked after 132 hours of intelligent debate)

 

[cambrai33]

I'm not saying we should ban anything, l just think the ugly misogyny needs to be shown the same degree of tolerance that, say, racism would. It goes like this:

OP: man im a virgin, none of the pretty girls want to have sex with me because they are shallow and I am not handsome, women are now in charge, men are persecuted, especially me, like the time I went to a prostitute and even she demanded cash upfront, like why are women so vapid man, no wonder I will ctb

REPLY #1: if this is how you view women your chances of getting a gf will remain slim to zero, regardless of looks - working on this may benefit you more than actual suicide

OP: yet another woke warrior controlled by the libfem media, I bet it's alright for you, l bet you're a nine out of ten for looks and catherine zeta Jones is sucking your dick right now, well watch this YouTube video where WOMAN_SLAYER_69 completely ANNYILATES ur argument with REASON and LOGIC u need 2 open ur mind to what's really going on out there and why it's bad that women can choose who they sleep with

REPLY #2: I don't necessarily agree with the op but this is a suicide forum and all reasons are valid and it is wrong of Reply #1 to make the op feel unwelcome

REPLY #3: (Quotes reply #1) why r u suggestin op not ctb, r u a goddam prolife cocksucker

(repeat to fade, thread inevitably locked after 132 hours of intelligent debate)

Shit, you are right, this is the same script, reimagined in different threads with different actors

I need a cup of tea

 

[demuic]

I didn't see this when I joined back in October and did nothing but lurk, maybe I just wasn't paying much attention though. I feel like this has become more prominent after the article. Maybe new members are bleeding in from their other ventures after the news broke that they ran both sites? I'm not sure.

It has already been known for a long time that they ran both sites. It wasn't a secret. It wouldn't have any effect on things.

I haven't noticed any increase in such content than usual. There have always been people discussing relationship or romantic woes, despite what some people would think there's nothing wrong with that and if you find such content tiresome or repetitive it's very easy to ignore or scroll past those threads. If things cross into unnecessary vitriol towards the opposite sex than they are usually dealt with either by the mods or users.

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

I'm not saying we should ban anything, l just think the ugly misogyny needs to be shown the same degree of tolerance that, say, racism would. It goes like this:

OP: man im a virgin, none of the pretty girls want to have sex with me because they are shallow and I am not handsome, women are now in charge, men are persecuted, especially me, like the time I went to a prostitute and even she demanded cash upfront, like why are women so vapid man, no wonder I will ctb

REPLY #1: if this is how you view women your chances of getting a gf will remain slim to zero, regardless of looks - working on this may benefit you more than actual suicide

OP: yet another woke warrior controlled by the libfem media, I bet it's alright for you, l bet you're a nine out of ten for looks and catherine zeta Jones is sucking your dick right now, well watch this YouTube video where WOMAN_SLAYER_69 completely ANNYILATES ur argument with REASON and LOGIC u need 2 open ur mind to what's really going on out there and why it's bad that women can choose who they sleep with

REPLY #2: I don't necessarily agree with the op but this is a suicide forum and all reasons are valid and it is wrong of Reply #1 to make the op feel unwelcome

REPLY #3: (Quotes reply #1) why r u suggestin op not ctb, r u a goddam prolife cocksucker

(repeat to fade, thread inevitably locked after 132 hours of intelligent debate)

I don't agree with anyone in your highly nuanced depiction of an incellular thread, guess #2 came close. I think the core "problem" here is that people write stupid things and the slightly more mindful/wise/mature people are whining about it. Now, as much as we can bash the immature, a better way is to lift those already capable of wisdom to where they are secure enough to be unbothered by those that they, now confidently, know are mistaken. Note, I am not talking about anything rule-breaking here, just this sort of bad thinking.

 

[Chinaski]

I don't agree with anyone in your highly nuanced depiction of an incellular thread, guess #2 came close. I think the core "problem" here is that people write stupid things and the slightly more mindful/wise/mature people are whining about it. Now, as much as we can bash the immature, a better way is to lift those already capable of wisdom to where they are secure enough to be unbothered by those that they, now confidently, know are mistaken. Note, I am not talking about anything rule-breaking here, just this sort of bad thinking.

Idk, I'm not sure it's incumbent on those "capable of wisdom" to be unbothered by actual misogyny, even when it's delicately rebranded as "immaturity".

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

Idk, I'm not sure it's incumbent on those "capable of wisdom" to be unbothered by actual misogyny, even when it's delicately rebranded as "immaturity".

I don't think it is necessary or even likely to happen, but it would be in everyone's benefit. Again, this depends on the case, sometimes a mind can be changed (but usually not by ridicule and vague pointers). Immaturity and stupidity is a part of misogyny, would you not agree? Not sure what you meant by that last part.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

Best thing is always to report them to mods, assuming its actionable or there's sufficient suspicion of rule-breaking or worse. Since the mods probably get overwhelmed as it is.

The "lesser" stuff that I've seen lately is quite easy to ignore and in fact there can be legitimate discussions around it where pretty interesting posts come up even if its from the other posters. Even the lesser stuff tends to go in circles if its an OP or completely ignored if its a comment.

When it's not ignored, it's probably because of the trauma of those particular posters, or its the same users making problems with the same other users until there's a breaking point reached. I doubt that it can be considered "lesser" in those cases.

 

[Chinaski]

I don't think it is necessary or even likely to happen, but it would be in everyone's benefit. Again, this depends on the case, sometimes a mind can be changed (but usually not by ridicule and vague pointers).

Tbh l find the thrust of your argument to be that the people who are *really* insecure are those who find the misogyny within the repetitive incel rhetoric objectionable, this is one of those instances where the normally noble position of "maybe we could be a bit more tolerant?" fails principally because much of the output is something that really should not be indulged to even that degree, but again l suspect this depends on where our individual lines are drawn.

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

Tbh l find the thrust of your argument to be that the people who are *really* insecure are those who find the misogyny within the repetitive incel rhetoric objectionable

Not insecure, no, just going about trying to change things the wrong way (imo).

this is one of those instances where the normally noble position of "maybe we could be a bit more tolerant?" fails principally because much of the output is something that really should not be indulged to even that degree, but again l suspect this depends on where our individual lines are drawn.

Not tolerance, understanding and teaching. What's best is if people can share information and arguments (genuine, good-faith engagement, usually starting only from one side but eventually spreading), but if that isn't possible (as I suspect in many of these cases) then second best is for the people further along to not fan the flames and to not suffer unnecessary stress and anxiety. If they enjoy it, as I tend to do (enjoying a bit of debate/banter), then that's another layer to it.