renaxx
Member
- Jul 30, 2025
- 36
I'm so tired of just existing. Every day feels like punishment, like I'm forced to carry some weight I was never meant to hold. No matter what I do, the pain never really goes away. It's always there, pressing down, suffocating me from the inside. I wake up already exhausted, and even breathing feels like a burden I never asked for.
I try to distract myself with routines, with TV or games, with stuff that's supposed to make life feel normal… but it never lasts. Nothing ever does. The pain finds me again, hits harder than before, reminding me there's no escape.
I can't see a future. When I try, its just blank… like a foggy horizon that never clears. No light, no hope. Just endless suffering that feels unbearable. People keep telling me it will get better, that time heals… but I've been waiting, and nothing changes. I feel invisible. Like no one really sees how much Im breaking inside. And when they notice, it's brushed off like I'm overreacting. That just makes me feel even more alone.
I don't want to keep pretending I'm okay when I'm not. I'm so tired of holding everything in, of carrying pain no one else can understand. The only thought that gives me a tiny bit of peace is not being here… being free from all this. It scares me and comforts me at the same time. I don't want to survive just for the sake of surviving. I don't want to wake up to another day that feels exactly like the last.
I try to distract myself with routines, with TV or games, with stuff that's supposed to make life feel normal… but it never lasts. Nothing ever does. The pain finds me again, hits harder than before, reminding me there's no escape.
I can't see a future. When I try, its just blank… like a foggy horizon that never clears. No light, no hope. Just endless suffering that feels unbearable. People keep telling me it will get better, that time heals… but I've been waiting, and nothing changes. I feel invisible. Like no one really sees how much Im breaking inside. And when they notice, it's brushed off like I'm overreacting. That just makes me feel even more alone.
I don't want to keep pretending I'm okay when I'm not. I'm so tired of holding everything in, of carrying pain no one else can understand. The only thought that gives me a tiny bit of peace is not being here… being free from all this. It scares me and comforts me at the same time. I don't want to survive just for the sake of surviving. I don't want to wake up to another day that feels exactly like the last.
