Venting Im telling a teacher everything, through a note

[sweetsweetsuicide]

I've hand written a long note, explaining what I'm struggling with and my plans for suicide. I know it sounds silly, but I struggle with speaking out loud with these things. I always freeze up and I'm unable to speak.

I'm scared what they will say or do after I've given the note. I hope I won't get kicked out of college for it

 

[iamanavalanche]

that sounds really risky. id expect they may get safeguarding involved - with the worst thing happening is getting police involved. pls be careful

 

[itsgone2]

I would hope they'd help, not kick you out.

 

[Rockman]

Sounds silly as fuck. Why do you want to involve a teacher in your mess? Go straight to the doors of the mental hospital.

 

[NearlyIrrelevantCake]

Teachers are often mandated reporters, meaning if they know someone has suicidal thoughts or plans, they're legally obligated to report it to the authorities. You're almost guaranteed to get a welfare check, if not an involuntary stay in the psych ward, out of this. I'd strongly advise against this.

 

[astr4]

what are you looking to gain from this? honestly if you need help i would give the note to a friend before a teacher or somebody with no attachment to me.

 

[Kitsune_BCN]

Dont do it its going to bring more troble than solution

 

[lunar02102009]

I've hand written a long note, explaining what I'm struggling with and my plans for suicide. I know it sounds silly, but I struggle with speaking out loud with these things. I always freeze up and I'm unable to speak.

I'm scared what they will say or do after I've given the note. I hope I won't get kicked out of college for it

Uhm. Not a very good idea imo but you do you

 

[Mäximum]

I do not really get why everyone thinks that this is a bad idea...

It seems like OP wants to talk about their feeling and has problems with saying them out loud. No problem with that. It can be hard for some. For me it certainly is.

OP also chose to write a teacher about this. Probably because he/she thinks that she can trust this person enough with such a letter. We do not know the teacher, so we can not know how he would react. Maybe if OP states that he/she does not want anyone else involved and would like to just have it "between them" at first, it would greatly help with his/her situation. That "you know that you [teacher] probably have to report this, but perhaps it is possible to make an exception."

I know some teachers at my school that would - so am I assuming because they do not seem stupid - not immediately report something like that if I clearly say that I do not want anyone else involved for the time being (I think that is important to say so that they think that you would be open for external help, even if you are not) that they will not immediately run to someone else.

You will also not get kicked out of college for that, OP. If you think that this is the best option for you, then go for it.

Good luck.

 

[Alice.]

on the surface level this can seem risky, but go for it if you think its a good idea. Mäximum is right, no one knows the details of your circumstance so they can't really judge if it's a good idea or not. he's also right that it may be a good idea to start the letter with a note to keep it private, sometimes this really is all it takes.

if you want to be cautious, and decrease the chances of anything bad happening if your teacher does decide to report it, you could leave out any sensitive or identifying details from the letter, type it out, and only handle it while wearing gloves. with this and perhaps other tactics, you can give yourself plausible deniability if questioned. i cant explain how to go about it in detail though since i dont really know what's going on.

 

[FireWalkWithMe]

As long as you are aware of the fact the teacher will be obliged to report that, and then it will obviously spiral from there.

Nothing wrong with the idea if you know that and want to talk, in fact that's great that you feel some hope in that.

 

[LackOfDetermination]

I do not really get why everyone thinks that this is a bad idea...

It seems like OP wants to talk about their feeling and has problems with saying them out loud. No problem with that. It can be hard for some. For me it certainly is.

OP also chose to write a teacher about this. Probably because he/she thinks that she can trust this person enough with such a letter. We do not know the teacher, so we can not know how he would react. Maybe if OP states that he/she does not want anyone else involved and would like to just have it "between them" at first, it would greatly help with his/her situation. That "you know that you [teacher] probably have to report this, but perhaps it is possible to make an exception."

I know some teachers at my school that would - so am I assuming because they do not seem stupid - not immediately report something like that if I clearly say that I do not want anyone else involved for the time being (I think that is important to say so that they think that you would be open for external help, even if you are not) that they will not immediately run to someone else.

You will also not get kicked out of college for that, OP. If you think that this is the best option for you, then go for it.

Good luck.

Although i agree we do not know the teacher enough to know what they'll do, again, teachers are mandated reporters and can get in a lot of legal trouble for NOT telling the authorities in the case of knowing a student is suicidal, especially with a HANDWRITTEN NOTE, so i understand warning OP about the possible (extremely likely, in my opinion) consequences.

 

[Minjas]

I've hand written a long note, explaining what I'm struggling with and my plans for suicide. I know it sounds silly, but I struggle with speaking out loud with these things. I always freeze up and I'm unable to speak.

I'm scared what they will say or do after I've given the note. I hope I won't get kicked out of college for it

Please don't do this! It's nothing wrong to talk about mental health to a trusted teacher, but as soon as you mention death/suicide/self harm, they are obligated to report it to the authorities and unless you're extremely lucky, you'll have to prepare yourself for a forced hospitalization.
I've done this with the school therapist 4 years ago (telling her I am planning to kill myself for a long time) and had both the police and ambulance pick me up in front of the school doors. I can tell you that it was the LAST thing I was expecting but it's real as shit.
No teacher is willing to take a risk like that. They rarely care about their students, all they care about is keeping their job and remaining a trusted employee amongst their colleagues and employers

 

[mangoastronaut]

College professors are mandated reporters. If you tell them this, they will get other people involved.

 

[telekon]

Sounds silly as fuck. Why do you want to involve a teacher in your mess? Go straight to the doors of the mental hospital.

I agree with this. The only possible outcome is they will tell the police and you will go to the hospital, so you mine as well just go to the hospital first without putting any burden on the teacher to make you go.

Like everyone else said, teachers are mandatory reporters. Very little of what you're planning will actually involve the teacher – they will just pass it on to somebody else.

 

[sweetsweetsuicide]

I've given the note to the teacher and she read it while I sat there. Despite what everyone has said, she hasn't told anyone and she just said she would hold onto it and talk to me again on another day about it.

I know it's a good thing that nothing really happened, but part of me is upset that I haven't been taken seriously. But either way, I'm going to keep working on my plan.

 

[jupiterflower]

I've given the note to the teacher and she read it while I sat there. Despite what everyone has said, she hasn't told anyone and she just said she would hold onto it and talk to me again on another day about it.

I know it's a good thing that nothing really happened, but part of me is upset that I haven't been taken seriously. But either way, I'm going to keep working on my plan.

good that she didnt do anything yet, id just be ready in case she calls at some later time, if she changes her mind

 

[whybother2002]

I'm not criticizing your actions, but what exactly are you trying to achieve? Do you have a strong bond with this teacher?

 

[LaVieEnRose]

I've given the note to the teacher and she read it while I sat there. Despite what everyone has said, she hasn't told anyone and she just said she would hold onto it and talk to me again on another day about it.

I know it's a good thing that nothing really happened, but part of me is upset that I haven't been taken seriously. But either way, I'm going to keep working on my plan.

What exactly did you say? Did you express an imminent intention to kill yourself?

If so, I would prepare yourself for a visit from the police. That may not happen but better not to be blindsided.