I’m so helpless

[loslassen]

yesterday I had a mental breakdown… on call with my partner. I'm really really grateful he was there, it's not that I dont appreciate his company, but even with the company I felt so incredibly miserable, I cried out a lot and pleaded and begged over all that hurts me so much, why must I feel so lonely so young? Why didn't I get a shot at life? why couldn't I just grow up to be normal? why couldn't my concerns just be breakups and grades? I don't have fair answers to those questions, just logical, clear reasoning as to why I live all I live, then consequences of my parents many mistakes, but I can never get a true "why". I think I just want an apology, from all who hurt me, but that's out of touch, no matter how much I voice my pain and suffering, it's broken and it always was.

 

[LastBitOfJoy]

Sorry for the things happened to you. I also question why my life has always been a miserable ride. I guess life doesn't choose, it just lets it happen randomly.

I usually think I am helpless too, but then again, I know myself better than anyone else, sometimes I think I can help myself without anyone involved. I fail mostly but at least I don't disappoint or affect anyone but myself and that feels better. Idk