I'm scared

[CookedRamen]

I'm not a religious person, and I'm barely spiritual. I'm scared of what comes next, does it all just go black and I'll be stuck hanging there for eternity. Will I wake up 50 years from now born into the body of someone else?
I'm scared of a lot of things. And I honestly don't want to do it. But when everything you love is taken away from you I feel like that's the time. The fear scares me more then anything. Normally when I am making an attempt I will cry or pretend to be happy. I will have a stoic resolution. But right now I'm just scared of what comes next. I have everything I need and it won't take anymore then 2 minutes to get setup. But then what? Do I say goodbye? Do I send a note to someone or do I just do it and wait for someone to find me in the morning. Maybe this post is my goodbye. Or maybe not.

I recently found a Reddit post from 2016 saying that I would inevitably ctb and it was honestly comforting. It reminded me that I've always known this was how things would end.
Thanks for reading my mini vent. I really appreciate it. I can only hope the best for anyone reading this.

 

[itsgone2]

I'm scared too. I really needed sleep tonight

I woke after two hours
It's over

I don't need to be here

Maybe it's a sign. To finally do it
Fml I'm stuck

 

[bananaolympus]

yeah this is why im doing it when im 100% positive i want to end it like in my first attempt no fear no hesitation but that feeling and mindset hasn't appeared again

 

[meatballlover]

Technically we'll never know. But i find nothingness to be the most logical outcome. It wont be any different than sleeping without dreams.

 

[Bikishii]

I'm not a religious person, and I'm barely spiritual. I'm scared of what comes next, does it all just go black and I'll be stuck hanging there for eternity. Will I wake up 50 years from now born into the body of someone else?
I'm scared of a lot of things. And I honestly don't want to do it. But when everything you love is taken away from you I feel like that's the time. The fear scares me more then anything. Normally when I am making an attempt I will cry or pretend to be happy. I will have a stoic resolution. But right now I'm just scared of what comes next. I have everything I need and it won't take anymore then 2 minutes to get setup. But then what? Do I say goodbye? Do I send a note to someone or do I just do it and wait for someone to find me in the morning. Maybe this post is my goodbye. Or maybe not.

I recently found a Reddit post from 2016 saying that I would inevitably ctb and it was honestly comforting. It reminded me that I've always known this was how things would end.
Thanks for reading my mini vent. I really appreciate it. I can only hope the best for anyone reading this.

I relate to this a lot. I don't believe in an afterlife, but none of us can know for certain. By the time we get to "the other side" and see what's there, we can't go back to the land of the living. Since I don't believe in an afterlife that means I don't believe in hell either, so it's not like there will be much pain on the other side... right?

Same here though, I don't know if I'll be stuck in the last "frame" of my life and experiencing that forever and ever for all eternity, is it just complete nothingness (something we can't truly comprehend)? I don't know. I'm eager but very scared to find out.

Some of us have found out though. I only wish we could know too for sure.