I'm ready to do it this weekend guys, with SN :)

[HappinessEmbodied]

Oh god, the peace I will feel. The pain will be gone. My suffering vanquished. This weekend, my boyfriend and I will travel out of state and to a secluded, private location to mix our SN and exit this world. The pain has become unbearable. I don't know if I will succeed, but I will feel better trying. Even if I am hospitalized, at least I tried. Even if I am institutionalized, at least I tried. We are keeping a backup of SN in a location where it won't be confiscated. All we've got are SN and benzos. We'll have extra prepared doses in case of vomiting.

As with anything, there is no guarantee it will work, but I don't feel like such a coward anymore. I am 100% committed to trying even if it doesn't work. Something has to give. We've already written our notes and will be printing them out to leave next to us.

They may try to revive us, they may try to stop our deaths, but they cannot stop us from trying, that is the one joy this disgusting, horror infested world cannot take from us. We are in control. The chance won't be taken from us. Fuck the world for trying to prevent this, for trying to make this more difficult. I hope the decomposition of our bodies serves as a brutal reminder to any who see them that they are the ones truly powerless, as we will no longer be.

Let it be known that I love him and am excited to hold him as we venture into the light together :)

 

[dospi1]

You may want to try the benzos before, so you understand how it feels, ive heard it can hit very hard

 

[Zegers]

when i think about this moment i feel peace too and i think my moment is near, maybe 1 year around

Good luck in your journey

 

[HappinessEmbodied]

You may want to try the benzos before, so you understand how it feels, ive heard it can hit very hard

Thanks for the advice, will try some a few days beforehand.

 

[Istanbulite]

Godspeed!

 

[ShepherdOfMyself]

It's been a good run with you, @HappinessEmbodied - one of the few joys I've still got in this life. I'm glad I get to go out on my terms, with you by my side.

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

I wish both of you the best. Peace and Love.

 

[Sleeper System]

I don't have anything to say except that you are lucky to have someone with you on this journey that we all hope to be brave enough to take one day. Not everyone will have that luxury when the time comes. I wish you guys good luck and a peaceful journey.

 

[AloneInCollege]

Do you have a plan in place in case one of you succeeds and the other doesn't?
But yeah, I hope the best for you both. It sounds like you both are really ready.

 

[HappinessEmbodied]

Do you have a plan in place in case one of you succeeds and the other doesn't?

If one survives and the other doesn't, all the more reason for the surviving one to try again. We'll ensure access to the backup stock if either or both survive.

 

[Sleeper System]

Sometimes when people ctb... I hope that in their goodbye thread they mention their real name or details so that we can know it's them if it comes up in the real world. Mostly because I want to be able to confirm that they succeeded and maybe that will give me hope and the courage to go through with my own exit plan. But really because even though I don't know anyone here personally... I feel like we are all connected somehow. Like the wire that Christmas lights are on. And when one light goes out... we know their life was completed.

For obvious reasons I can assume why no one would want people to know who they are. I just have day dreams of waking up and checking my feed and it saying so and so did such and such and they are gone. I would say oh my god... I spoke with him before. I gave her some comforting advice. I did something. I'm glad they found there way out of this place. Idk maybe im just being weird. Ignore me.

 

[ShepherdOfMyself]

If one survives and the other doesn't, all the more reason for the surviving one to try again. We'll ensure access to the backup stock if either or both survive.

Yeah. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if she died and I didn't (and I'd probably get life in jail anyway).

 

[FuneralCry]

This world really is so cruel and horrifying. I'm sorry that you have suffered so much in life. I hope that you find relief from pain in whatever happens, I wish you the best.

 

[mrselfdestruct]

Good luck and godspeed, may you find peace in whatever decision you make.

 

[tonytwist007]

Can it be done without the benzos? I only have SN.

 

[Deleted member 65988]

Can it be done without the benzos? I only have SN.

Don't know why you are commenting on an old thread but yes, it can be. Not everyone whose ctb with SN had access to benzos. Endsjstifiesthemeans only had SN and according to Mxverick, they did ctb. Can't say about how comfortable it will be because I don't doubt there will be a greater level of discomfort than there would've been with a sedative of some kind.

 

[i.was.lonely]

Oh god, the peace I will feel. The pain will be gone. My suffering vanquished. This weekend, my boyfriend and I will travel out of state and to a secluded, private location to mix our SN and exit this world. The pain has become unbearable. I don't know if I will succeed, but I will feel better trying. Even if I am hospitalized, at least I tried. Even if I am institutionalized, at least I tried. We are keeping a backup of SN in a location where it won't be confiscated. All we've got are SN and benzos. We'll have extra prepared doses in case of vomiting.

As with anything, there is no guarantee it will work, but I don't feel like such a coward anymore. I am 100% committed to trying even if it doesn't work. Something has to give. We've already written our notes and will be printing them out to leave next to us.

They may try to revive us, they may try to stop our deaths, but they cannot stop us from trying, that is the one joy this disgusting, horror infested world cannot take from us. We are in control. The chance won't be taken from us. Fuck the world for trying to prevent this, for trying to make this more difficult. I hope the decomposition of our bodies serves as a brutal reminder to any who see them that they are the ones truly powerless, as we will no longer be.

Let it be known that I love him and am excited to hold him as we venture into the light together :)

are you using an antiemetic? if so, which one?

 

[wheretfami]

Good luck dear. Do you have a plan for if one of you fails and the other succeeds? Just try again?
I wish you peace

 

[viljalauss]

Good luck dear. Do you have a plan for if one of you fails and the other succeeds? Just try again?
I wish you peace

this thread is over a year old

 

[wheretfami]

this thread is over a year old

Oh wtf, I missed that I guess. Hope everything went well.

 

[Iamtired]

I want to find someone who is this dedicated and will do it with me.