I’m off

[Emily_Numb]

It's sad to say, but my time on this forum has run its course. It's no longer the place it once was when I joined and I no longer wish to have any part in it.

I've spoken with some interesting lovely people, learned a lot, but unfortunately I seem to come across more and more toxicity each time I visit, certainly in the past couple of months. It's actually hindering my mental health being a part of the forum now. It's just drama after drama and trouble making/flame wars and nothing ever gets done about it.

This was one a place for support and community. It no longer is. The ship is sinking and I'm hopping in a life raft and getting the hell out of here while I still can.

Best of luck to you all, but I truly believe this forum is in its death throws for want of a better word.

Wishing you all the very best,

Emily Numb x

 

[AikiDragon]

I just joined yesterday so can't relate, but you have my best wishes. I'm sorry it didn't work out here. I hope things get better for you.

 

[Konjac]

I'm sorry to see you go. Quite a lot of active members are leaving due to all the drama going on right now, and I can't blame you whatsoever... the glory days of SS are over for sure, and it's sad to see. Truly wishing you the best of luck, I'll really miss seeing you around. I hope things work out for you.

 

[WornOutLife]

I'm sorry you're leaving us. It must be because I became active a months ago, but I still love this community. It's the only place in which both people and I can understand each other.

Gonna miss you and who knows? We might cross paths again.

Hugs and love,

Matt

 

[justpeachy]

I can see what you mean. I feel like the overall moderation here is very poor. I think there are way too many people that are clearly under 18 and honestly maybe even under 15-16 that are here, more and more of the forum is the same five posts of people who can't even bother to take 5 minutes to read the rules and look over the resources. I am going to quite literally go crazy if I see one more, wHaT iS tHe BeSt WaY tO kIlL mYsElF? It just feels like even the moderators aren't going by the rules anymore... like it's a rule that you need to read the resources first and if you post make sure it has SUBSTANCE (literally says that in the rules THEY wrote) and I am pretty sure the 6th post of the day that says what can I do to kill myself post is not considered SUBSTANCE and any direct answer to that would be breaking another rule, NO ADVICE! It all just kind of feels hypocritical at this point. Why even bother making the rules if they are not going to be adhered to? I also think especially right now it's pertinent to change to members only reading posts (permanently) especially if you are going to keep letting minors knowingly join this group and then they are posting pictures of themselves, their names/locations and not thinking of all the consequences of that. At least keep your members safe if you are going to keep allowing the rule of no minors to be broken time and time again. Frankly, I never would have joined this forum had I known they allow minors here. I wanted an adult only space to talk about this. ‍*shrugs* Sorry.

 

[Catlovergirl]

Please don't just leave as I'm only now getting into reading everything, however if you feel you need to I'll understand. Peace.

 

[demuic]

I can see what you mean. I feel like the overall moderation here is very poor. I think there are way too many people that are clearly under 18 and honestly maybe even under 15-16 that are here, more and more of the forum is the same five posts of people who can't even bother to take 5 minutes to read the rules and look over the resources. I am going to quite literally go crazy if I see one more, wHaT iS tHe BeSt WaY tO kIlL mYsElF? It just feels like even the moderators aren't going by the rules anymore... like it's a rule that you need to read the resources first and if you post make sure it has SUBSTANCE (literally says that in the rules THEY wrote) and I am pretty sure the 6th post of the day that says what can I do to kill myself post is not considered SUBSTANCE and any direct answer to that would be breaking another rule, NO ADVICE! It all just kind of feels hypocritical at this point. Why even bother making the rules if they are not going to be adhered to? I also think especially right now it's pertinent to change to members only reading posts (permanently) especially if you are going to keep letting minors knowingly join this group and then they are posting pictures of themselves, their names/locations and not thinking of all the consequences of that. At least keep your members safe if you are going to keep allowing the rule of no minors to be broken time and time again. Frankly, I never would have joined this forum had I known they allow minors here. I wanted an adult only space to talk about this. ‍*shrugs* Sorry.

Even if it is members only there's no way of making sure someone isn't a minor short of having ID verification.

 

[Silver]

Good luck with your continued recovery, @Emily_Numb .

 

[justpeachy]

Even if it is members only there's no way of making sure someone isn't a minor short of having ID verification.

Then maybe they need to go that direction. Also, I wasn't implying the members only for that. I was saying because anyone can just read our posts. I don't like that. At the very least make them set up an account then a lot of the staring at the crazy zoo animals will stop.

 

[wannagohome]

All my best wishes for you !

 

[K-O]

i do understand and feel the same mate its been bubbling up..
changes are inevitable and it hurts to feel our raft sinking,
hope you wont bann but leave the door open, when something is important and you cut off abruptly it can cause unwanted pain, always good to leave yourself a future choice, wish you peace

 

[LastFlowers]

Then maybe they need to go that direction. Also, I wasn't implying the members only for that. I was saying because anyone can just read our posts. I don't like that. At the very least make them set up an account then a lot of the staring at the crazy zoo animals will stop.

I highly doubt ID verification would slide, all things considered. That would be a dangerous requirement and foolish of anyone to meet it. I think it would alienate way more than just minors, plus, there are ways to fake that as well.

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

I don't see the problem. Some kids are posting pictures of their dad's belt hanging from a doorknob once in a while, sure. Only caught a few of your posts, hope you're able to resolve the insomnia. F.

 

[WatermelonMel]

wHaT iS tHe BeSt WaY tO kIlL mYsElF?

Every time I see a thread with a question like that I can't help but feel like it's bait so prolifers can screenshot the responses and call us all murderers.

 

[Lupgevif]

Bye bye.

 

[SkarletWitch]

Aww, that's depressing... Wish you good luck though.

 

[Symbiote]

Hello Emily, I'm sorry to see you go, but I understand that the forum climate has changed drastically to where it could be detrimental to a person's mental well-being. I have enjoyed your posts and your blunt attitude towards certain topics. In a way you were realistic about things, no-nonsense, no sugarcoating, you tell it like it is and I admired you for that. I wish you well in your recovery Emily. Take care!

 

[SkarletWitch]

But it's sobering at the same time. Maybe that's why, the subforum for more experienced users was a good idea?

 

[justpeachy]

Every time I see a thread with a question like that I can't help but feel like it's bait so prolifers can screenshot the responses and call us all murderers.

Let's hope so tbh. I just can't cope with there really being that many people out there that can't take 5 seconds to skim over the rules. Or realize that it's illegal in *most* countries to tell someone how they should go off themselves, not to mention that is such a hugely personal choice. I could never make that for another human being. I can make it for myself all day though.

But it's sobering at the same time. Maybe that's why, the subforum for more experienced users was a good idea?

I never saw this idea mentioned, I really like this idea! That would make it so at least we had a place to get away from all the mundane "how do I kill myself" questions for the 7744th time today.

I highly doubt ID verification would slide, all things considered. That would be a dangerous requirement and foolish of anyone to meet it. I think it would alienate way more than just minors, plus, there are ways to fake that as well.

It would just be verified by one person, the owner of this website and honestly it's naive to think the website owner cannot already see very personal information of yours as it's a rule that you cannot sign up with a VPN and anyone with any basic computer knowledge (which the owner of this site has more than basic knowledge) can easily find out very personal information about you. Not to mention so many people on here don't read the rules, again, and use their full names as their username, I have seen them post actual pictures of themselves (mostly in trying to bait compliments), and use their pictures as a PFP with their location written on their profile so honestly not really sure how an ID verification for age is so much more dangerous than what a ton of ppl already do on here out of ignorance. We have had detectives and police show up at peoples houses trying to section them. That's why they tell you do not give out personal info. Not everyone is your friend and the reality is anyone can read this site.

 

[aeon]

It would just be verified by one person, the owner of this website and honestly it's naive to think the website owner cannot already see very personal information of yours as it's a rule that you cannot sign up with a VPN and anyone with any basic computer knowledge (which the owner of this site has more than basic knowledge) can easily find out very personal information about you.

Just because you can't sign up from behind a proxy doesn't mean you have to use your own IP. I signed up from a cafe where I never go and where no one knows me, on a clean-dedicated device, wearing a baseball cap + black glasses and I wiped the mug clean before leaving :)
Seriously though, as a general rule, I think you should never trust anybody here or anywhere else on the net, people change, friends today....So ID verif by the admins-owners is a big No No for me.

 

[Amumu]

Good bye, take care.

More generally : why insult this community (which you belong to) and more especially the moderators, people?

 

[SkarletWitch]

I never saw this idea mentioned, I really like this idea! That would make it so at least we had a place to get away from all the mundane "how do I kill myself" questions for the 7744th time today.

This subforum already exists so far as I know (I don't have access yet) , but is visible only to accounts that reached certain amount of posts/reactions.

People where debating if its good idea, but I think it is.

 

[justpeachy]

This subforum already exists so far as I know (I don't have access yet) , but is visible only to accounts that reached certain amount of posts/reactions.

People where debating if its good idea, but I think it is.

Ooh, I have been here for like 6 months so I should have enough to get in, I'll have to go check it out.

Good bye, take care.

More generally : why insult this community (which you belong to) and more especially the moderators, people?

I don't really see constructive criticism as bashing anyone? We're allowed to have opinions about the group and what may be changed for the better. Also, don't have rules if you aren't going to enforce or follow them? I feel like that's just kind of common sense. I also don't see one post where anyone insulted a mod? I see where many people including myself said things they wish could be changed but nobody ever insulted anyone which would be like if I said XYZ mod is an idiot.

Just because you can't sign up from behind a proxy doesn't mean you have to use your own IP. I signed up from a cafe where I never go and where no one knows me, on a clean-dedicated device, wearing a baseball cap + black glasses and I wiped the mug clean before leaving :)
Seriously though, as a general rule, I think you should never trust anybody here or anywhere else on the net, people change, friends today....So ID verif by the admins-owners is a big No No for me.

I would imagine most people probably aren't doing what you did though ;) so I would say the average SS could easily be traced by someone with even moderate computer skills.

 

[Idledays]

I have to admit I'm sometimes feeling a bit conflicted about the site.

The main thing I've found is too many people jumping at someone's post as being 'pro life', or a cop, or something to be suspicious of. I know why people feel like that as there's been a lot of scrutiny of the site publicly, but i don't think this attitude helps.

In fact, it makes people wary of trying to suggest anything OTHER than death sometimes, for fear of being called out as not genuine. Which is a real shame.

There's nothing inherently wrong about suggesting alternatives to death, any more than there is accepting someone's wish to die.

I do worry that whilst many of us have been through mental health services and heard the same old stuff, many users may not have (especially the younger ones). So whilst its tiresome to hear if you've been dealing mental health crisis teams for years, its a Worthwhile 'bore' or 'frustration' if there are younger users who haven't given those other options a try.

It is hard. I don't want people to spout the same shit at me I've heard a million times, but i REALLY dont want a member who hasn't engaged with mental health services to be deprived of that opportunity, or worse still put off, if they haven't given it a go.

We should always be able to speak openly about our experiences without fear of someone shouting "pro-life" at someone for asking questions about someones motivations / decisions to die.

Let's not let people who want to shut us down turn us all against one another through suspicion and fear.

 

[Good4Nothing]

Yah, this place doesn't feel like home anymore. I'm drifting away, too.
I wish you luck, Emily. I mean that.
Take care of yourself.

 

[justpeachy]

I have to admit I'm sometimes feeling a bit conflicted about the site.

The main thing I've found is too many people jumping at someone's post as being 'pro life', or a cop, or something to be suspicious of. I know why people feel like that as there's been a lot of scrutiny of the site publicly, but i don't think this attitude helps.

In fact, it makes people wary of trying to suggest anything OTHER than death sometimes, for fear of being called out as not genuine. Which is a real shame.

There's nothing inherently wrong about suggesting alternatives to death, any more than there is accepting someone's wish to die.

I do worry that whilst many of us have been through mental health services and heard the same old stuff, many users may not have (especially the younger ones). So whilst its tiresome to hear if you've been dealing mental health crisis teams for years, its a Worthwhile 'bore' or 'frustration' if there are younger users who haven't given those other options a try.

It is hard. I don't want people to spout the same shit at me I've heard a million times, but i REALLY dont want a member who hasn't engaged with mental health services to be deprived of that opportunity, or worse still put off, if they haven't given it a go.

We should always be able to speak openly about our experiences without fear of someone shouting "pro-life" at someone for asking questions about someones motivations / decisions to die.

Let's not let people who want to shut us down turn us all against one another through suspicion and fear.

I have to agree with you. I have literally seen users get mad and tell a member that posted saying they might want to go to a psych hospital instead of CTB that it would be "worthless and don't bother, just follow through with CTB." This kind of stuff shouldn't be happening. Mods really need to get rid of comments like that as it's not productive at all. It's also very anti choice which this whole group really stands for!

 

[Amumu]

Ooh, I have been here for like 6 months so I should have enough to get in, I'll have to go check it out.

I don't really see constructive criticism as bashing anyone? We're allowed to have opinions about the group and what may be changed for the better. Also, don't have rules if you aren't going to enforce or follow them? I feel like that's just kind of common sense. I also don't see one post where anyone insulted a mod? I see where many people including myself said things they wish could be changed but nobody ever insulted anyone which would be like if I said XYZ mod is an idiot.

I would imagine most people probably aren't doing what you did though ;) so I would say the average SS could easily be traced by someone with even moderate computer skills.

Insulting definition : "giving or intended to give offence"
Some comments here could be deemed insulting.

And it's absolutely your right to be deemed insulting by some people, you know, it isn't against the rules.
I don't consider criticism here that constructive, but that's just me, I respect that.

 

[justpeachy]

Insulting definition : "giving or intended to give offence"
Some comments here could be deemed insulting.

And it's absolutely your right to be deemed insulting by some people, you know, it isn't against the rules.
I don't consider criticism here that constructive, but that's just me, I respect that.

I mean, it should probably be the person it's directed at that should be the one to say if it was insulting or not. It's not really anyone else's place to decide for them if it was an insulting statement and frankly I don't see anything that I can see any reason to be offended by or that is downright mean but maybe I missed something or something was deleted.

 

[loopylou]

I can see what you mean. I feel like the overall moderation here is very poor. I think there are way too many people that are clearly under 18 and honestly maybe even under 15-16 that are here, more and more of the forum is the same five posts of people who can't even bother to take 5 minutes to read the rules and look over the resources. I am going to quite literally go crazy if I see one more, wHaT iS tHe BeSt WaY tO kIlL mYsElF? It just feels like even the moderators aren't going by the rules anymore... like it's a rule that you need to read the resources first and if you post make sure it has SUBSTANCE (literally says that in the rules THEY wrote) and I am pretty sure the 6th post of the day that says what can I do to kill myself post is not considered SUBSTANCE and any direct answer to that would be breaking another rule, NO ADVICE! It all just kind of feels hypocritical at this point. Why even bother making the rules if they are not going to be adhered to? I also think especially right now it's pertinent to change to members only reading posts (permanently) especially if you are going to keep letting minors knowingly join this group and then they are posting pictures of themselves, their names/locations and not thinking of all the consequences of that. At least keep your members safe if you are going to keep allowing the rule of no minors to be broken time and time again. Frankly, I never would have joined this forum had I known they allow minors here. I wanted an adult only space to talk about this. ‍*shrugs* Sorry.

I agree with the minors and also setting the privacy to members only. It's quite apparent when a minor posts on here. They shouldn't be here, end of.

 

[Yakamoz]

It's sad to say, but my time on this forum has run its course. It's no longer the place it once was when I joined and I no longer wish to have any part in it.

I've spoken with some interesting lovely people, learned a lot, but unfortunately I seem to come across more and more toxicity each time I visit, certainly in the past couple of months. It's actually hindering my mental health being a part of the forum now. It's just drama after drama and trouble making/flame wars and nothing ever gets done about it.

This was one a place for support and community. It no longer is. The ship is sinking and I'm hopping in a life raft and getting the hell out of here while I still can.

Best of luck to you all, but I truly believe this forum is in its death throws for want of a better word.

Wishing you all the very best,

Emily Numb x

Sorry to hear that Emily