Venting i'm not a good person and nobody can convince me otherwise

[emptymiku]

i have never understood the people who can just say to "love yourself". i don't get it. i don't think i've ever loved basically anything about myself, especially personality or appearence wise, except for my eye color i guess. but guess what, that's the one thing i can't control. i'm just inherently such a selfish person and while i'm trying to be less of a burden on others i will never be able to think of myself as even decent. i just don't understand how people can actually love themself. like. it's not narcissistic to be happy with yourself but i just don't understand it. i've always hated myself ever since i was a kid... i hate being alive so much :(

 

[MelancholyMagic]

Are you a good person in an absolute sense? Doubtful. Very few people are. Are you any worse than the next guy? Probably not. And that counts for a lot.

 

[quietpill]

Like the other commenter, I believe a good vs evil slider to rate yourself on is unproductive. Humanity is much more grayscale, not so easy to define. We are both our mistakes and more than the sum of them, we are our thoughts, desires, ambitions, fears, and guilt. The fact that you care at all about not being a good person says so much about you. Self hatred is often pathological, something to be untangled from a multitude of experiences and internalization. It is also one of the hardest things we can do and requires help and support, which is understandably hard to achieve. Spiraling feels natural when humans are not born to fly.

 

[emptymiku]

Like the other commenter, I believe a good vs evil slider to rate yourself on is unproductive. Humanity is much more grayscale, not so easy to define. We are both our mistakes and more than the sum of them, we are our thoughts, desires, ambitions, fears, and guilt. The fact that you care at all about not being a good person says so much about you. Self hatred is often pathological, something to be untangled from a multitude of experiences and internalization. It is also one of the hardest things we can do and requires help and support, which is understandably hard to achieve. Spiraling feels natural when humans are not born to fly.

:(