Venting Im done with treatment, it never left me feeling better

[Abstract]

Ive tried and tried but my head just got more fuzzy the longer I did it.

So Ive stopped taking my meds i stopped showing up to appointments and stop scheduling them all together. I talk to as few people as possible just so I dont piss someone off. But even at that I fail. I fail, I fail, I fail. I dont know how much longer I can take all these failures before I do something about myself.

I can no longer sleep, or can only sleep for an hour. My brain hurts and my eyes are heavy but no rest comes. Soon Ill go to work again. Its not awful, but only having one day off a week is draining my limited supply of energy that I have left.

Life fucking sucks and it doesnt seem to get better.

 

[FuneralCry]

That does sound really tiring what you have to go through, and I think that it's very true that these "treatments", often just lead to even more suffering. Existing in this world really can be so awful, and I think that existing usually just gets worse as time goes on, there could certainly never be any peace to be found in this cruel world. But anyway, best wishes.