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Apr 12, 2024
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I couldn't sleep yesterday because I had a terrible nightmare, in which I saw my mother hanging in front of my father chained to a chair, crying, screaming and growling like an animal, my mother screamed a lot before someone kicked the chair and just then she didn't speak anymore and I was watching the scene, when I woke up my eye was red from crying and my eyes were wide open, I ran to the bathroom and saw my face, it was falling apart, like it was melting and I screamed and I punched the glass when I looked at my hand, it was broken and bleeding a lot, but I didn't feel the pain because the blood was hot. If that scene in my dream really happened, I don't want to believe that I was the one who created the whole scene. Now I'm typing this on the sofa in the living room, with a table in front of me, on top of that table there's a revolver with only one ammunition in the drum, I'm spinning it, I don't know if I want to live, even though I'm trying to find my brother, I can't see him anymore no chance and also he thinks I'm dead anyway, I'm invisible to everyone I've met. At that time I hear my brother's very low voices whispering in my ear for me to die.
 
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