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J

juxtaposse

Member
Jan 16, 2025
5
I am trying to do my best here, I am trying to keep going but I am having a brutal time at it, so I want to have some education on method options so I don't feel so trapped.

Some info:
I am a wheelchair user who can sometimes walk. Low strength, cannot go far from where I live.

My car is broken down, I have no money for transport, and I cannot walk far without falling and getting stuck there, also my chair battery doesn't last long.

I don't have much money for supplies either, maybe $10. I don't expect to have any source of income, the system is screwed and I am unlucky enough to basically not have a way to get any money to live off of.

I am in immense pain from my disabilities and being unable to buy my meds and transport myself to PT.

My abuser wants me dead and I wasn't granted the order to protect me from him. He has conceal carry and wants to shoot me and make it a painful death, so I would rather not let him do the job. Also he doesn't deserve the satisfaction.

I have two dogs and I would like them to be safe from this so I can't do it in my dorm room. I also don't want to wait too long for scheduled texts to go out so that they can be found and cared for.

I would prefer the method to be less painful than an abusive man shooting me to death would be. He would do it in a sadistic manner, like everything else he does.

If anyone has any advice for how I can survive this situation and keep going, I am all ears. I basically am not safe from him when outside and I can't stay in my dorm forever. I'm tired of hiding and being in pain and I just want it to all stop one way or another.
 
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Reactions: sadAndLost, Tonic_Secrecy and Young
Young

Young

Student
Dec 8, 2024
112
Are you not able to get in contact with anyone?

I think it's against the rules to suggest methods, but there is probably drowning. Combined with deodorant huffing.
 
Upvote 0
pixi

pixi

(formerly goredpet) buying time on minimum wage
Jan 11, 2025
88
I'm sorry you feel forced into CTB. do you know why a restraining order wasn't granted? usually something as worrisome as that would be granted immediately. I wouldn't give up on the legal route yet. I know it may seem like a dead end, but there has got to be more options. I wish the best for you.
 
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Reactions: Tonic_Secrecy
Upvote 0
Tonic_Secrecy

Tonic_Secrecy

:<3
Jan 18, 2025
73
Well, with a budget of 10 dollars, you really don't have a lot of options, unfortunately. So, I can only really suggest partial hanging. If you've got an extension cord at home, you can go ahead and use that. I've used extension cords before to get pretty close to passing out, so you should be good there.

It's moderately uncomfortable, but I wouldn't say painful—especially not more so than a gunshot, which varies. Either your adrenaline kicks in and you just feel a harsh impact, or you experience a stinging, burning sensation from what I've read.

Other than that, I don't really have any other methods that I think you could do successfully. Whatever happens, I hope you find your peace.
 
Upvote 0
J

juxtaposse

Member
Jan 16, 2025
5
I'm sorry you feel forced into CTB. do you know why a restraining order wasn't granted? usually something as worrisome as that would be granted immediately. I wouldn't give up on the legal route yet. I know it may seem like a dead end, but there has got to be more options. I wish the best for you.
The judge didn't believe he actually abused me, even when I showed him images and medical records of the injuries inflicted. He was extremely biased, so I think that is why.

The issue is, I just don't have much funding to keep getting rides to court. I'm trying my best but it is exhausting hunting down free rides when they are needed.
Are you not able to get in contact with anyone?

I think it's against the rules to suggest methods, but there is probably drowning. Combined with deodorant huffing.
Like, contact someone here? I'm unsure how to do that, sorry...

I didn't mean to do anything against the rules. I am just struggling to find information because everything is so censored everywhere.
 
Upvote 0

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