Venting idk what's happening

[daskoganza]

howdy! this is my first thread here, i've been a lurker since 2023. (im sorry if i cant express myself right, english isnt my first language)
I've always imagined: what would happen if i die? would people care? would i get a tribute? idk
and that thought is stronger than ever, i don't wanna die, yk? im way better now than 2023, but, some stuff happened this month, a bunch of stuff that accumulated and it's not making me feel good, my gf broke up with me, my bsf told something about me to someone that I needed help, and she ruined all of my chances to get into one of my favorite pastoral ministry team from my college (I study in a catholic college). She knew how important it was to me, yet still did that, i feel betrayed and honestly, i won't talk to her until she apologizes, she's been trying to contact me, but I really don't wanna respond.
Plus, I've been losing interest in doing things I love, for example, editing and making music, I just don't feel like doing it, and when I try to do it, it's just not as good as it was before :/
And I had an argument with my godmother, I tried venting to her today, but she tried to find solutions to my problems that I just want to let them happen, you know? She didn't listen to what I said, she was "interrupting" me all the time, when I just wanted to be heard, so, I came here.

idrk how to end this, so, good night! (and sorry if I posted this in the wrong category)

 

[Leonszabs]

Hi, welcome to the website. I don't know you obviously, but I really do sympathize with you. Your friend may have had good intentions with trying to communicate with someone about you needing help, but at the same time she would've talked to you first. Has she tried to explain herself to you yet? Either way, that sucks, and I am really sorry! I'm hoping you can find something else to do that you will enjoy! We all here definitely understand what you are feeling even though we haven't all been in the exact same scenarios. Sending you my love

 

[fedup1982]

Losing interest in things is a sign of depression, I'd go to your doctor and talk about it.

Im frustrated with music production too. I just am not getting any inspiration and it doesn't help that im just not sitting in front of my DAW anymore, I don't know if its a chicken and egg situation. What kind of music do you like to make?

 

[daskoganza]

Losing interest in things is a sign of depression, I'd go to your doctor and talk about it.

Im frustrated with music production too. I just am not getting any inspiration and it doesn't help that im just not sitting in front of my DAW anymore, I don't know if its a chicken and egg situation. What kind of music do you like to make?

i actually have a band! idk our genre tho, cause we're very diverse, but mostly experimental hip-hop? I REALLY don't know in which category we fit in lol

Hi, welcome to the website. I don't know you obviously, but I really do sympathize with you. Your friend may have had good intentions with trying to communicate with someone about you needing help, but at the same time she would've talked to you first. Has she tried to explain herself to you yet? Either way, that sucks, and I am really sorry! I'm hoping you can find something else to do that you will enjoy! We all here definitely understand what you are feeling even though we haven't all been in the exact same scenarios. Sending you my love

thank you! idk if ill talk to her about it cause that made me really upset, maybe later, idrk. She didn't try to explain herself first, she just sent me these texts:

"[my name]"
"talk to me"

then didn't send anything else

 

[Leonszabs]

i actually have a band! idk our genre tho, cause we're very diverse, but mostly experimental hip-hop? I REALLY don't know in which category we fit in lol

thank you! idk if ill talk to her about it cause that made me really upset, maybe later, idrk. She didn't try to explain herself first, she just sent me these texts:

"[my name]"
"talk to me"

then didn't send anything else

Ahh, I see. I would've done the same thing as you then, I wouldn't have responded. Maybe give yourself a bit to think about what happened, then you could possibly text her something like:

"Hey *insert name*, I didn't contact you because you made me upset and violated my trust. I need to know why you did what you did, and we can go from there." and maybe you can explain what she did that made you upset. Hoping it goes well if you do choose to talk to her soon!