Idk what to do

[idkwhoami]

Im really tired, i dont know how long i could keep up with everything anymore, i dont want to die but i feel like its my only option atp. My anxiety has gon so bad every little thing I do scares me. I have no friends and my family disowned me. Honestly I thought feeling Lonely is bad, being completely alone and not only feeling it is worse, I try to think things would get better and its just a matter of time, but then again I looks at everybody's pathetic life and just wish I wasn't here to experience it too. Im too much of a pussy to kms and also im afraid that if i will kms I would just come back to life as a different person and relive all this pain again, I honestly just dont know what to do

 

[hhh_]

i feel the same, hope things get better for you

 

[day]

I share a very similar mindset OP and I'm sorry you as well feel this way. I often think I'm to scared to CTB though I've slowly been obtaining the items to do so in hopes one night I feel nothing and can just get it over with.

I'm sorry once more OP, no one deserves to suffer like this it's cruel and inhumane. Wish we all just had a safe way to exit this futile existence.

 

[MrDarkness]

I'm sorry for your suffering, I can't say life gets better cause idk if it does, life is a gamble it's either shit or good. I hate chances

 

[whywere]

Im really tired, i dont know how long i could keep up with everything anymore, i dont want to die but i feel like its my only option atp. My anxiety has gon so bad every little thing I do scares me. I have no friends and my family disowned me. Honestly I thought feeling Lonely is bad, being completely alone and not only feeling it is worse, I try to think things would get better and its just a matter of time, but then again I looks at everybody's pathetic life and just wish I wasn't here to experience it too. Im too much of a pussy to kms and also im afraid that if i will kms I would just come back to life as a different person and relive all this pain again, I honestly just dont know what to do

Howdy!

My heart broke into a million pieces reading your post. It is all over SS about me, as far as my "parents" called me "the mistake" to my face and in public and at 18 I got kicked out and never heard from them again, 100% their choice. Now that was in 1974, yep, I am 67 and have lived through a lot of life's trials and tribulations, 2 attempts, lots of 72-hour hospital holds, fighting the court system so that I was not long term committed.

I also have no family nor friends, EXCEPT everyone on SS, who are my extended family. With that aspect said, I consider you a good friend and want the best for you always.

You are NOT a pussy or anything of such ever. One can tell by your writing that you are a kind, caring, sensitive and intelligent soul. I get the aspect of feeling like one is running into a wall with nothing on the horizon, BUT in all my years, at least for me and I bet for you also down the road of life, out of the blue comes along something that made me smile, feel good about myself.

Case in point, back in the summer of 1981, I had just finished my 1st year of college, I went late at the age of 24, and was flat broke. No money for food, gas nothing and one the folks that I went to college with heard about it and asked his dad to hire me for the summer and it REALLY got me out of a bind. It was truly out of the blue.

I still work, so I am not on all the time, but please feel free to pm me and I will get back to you as soon as possible.

We are all different BUT also all the same, hand in hand, shoulder to shoulder.

Sending you lots of huge hugs, love, caring and the knowledge that you are a loving, caring and very intelligent soul.

Walter

 

[strawb12]

I don't usually encourage ctbing but at this point it really might be the best option if you find a method with very low SI. If you don't plan on going through with anything thats great tho & I hope that things do eventually get better. Obviously it isn't guaranteed or even likely but theres still a chance right.

 

[FuneralCry]

I do understand that it's so awful and tiring feeling trapped here, but I don't really think that one is cowardly if they struggle to ctb in this world where suicide is purposely made so difficult. I wish it was easier to finally escape from all the suffering that existing brings.

 

[idkwhoami]

Howdy!

My heart broke into a million pieces reading your post. It is all over SS about me, as far as my "parents" called me "the mistake" to my face and in public and at 18 I got kicked out and never heard from them again, 100% their choice. Now that was in 1974, yep, I am 67 and have lived through a lot of life's trials and tribulations, 2 attempts, lots of 72-hour hospital holds, fighting the court system so that I was not long term committed.

I also have no family nor friends, EXCEPT everyone on SS, who are my extended family. With that aspect said, I consider you a good friend and want the best for you always.

You are NOT a pussy or anything of such ever. One can tell by your writing that you are a kind, caring, sensitive and intelligent soul. I get the aspect of feeling like one is running into a wall with nothing on the horizon, BUT in all my years, at least for me and I bet for you also down the road of life, out of the blue comes along something that made me smile, feel good about myself.

Case in point, back in the summer of 1981, I had just finished my 1st year of college, I went late at the age of 24, and was flat broke. No money for food, gas nothing and one the folks that I went to college with heard about it and asked his dad to hire me for the summer and it REALLY got me out of a bind. It was truly out of the blue.

I still work, so I am not on all the time, but please feel free to pm me and I will get back to you as soon as possible.

We are all different BUT also all the same, hand in hand, shoulder to shoulder.

Sending you lots of huge hugs, love, caring and the knowledge that you are a loving, caring and very intelligent soul.

Walter

Thank you that made me feel better