I'm wondering if anyone else here shares my sentiment on this.
All my life, I've searched for my calling, my particular purpose. I used to think that I was called to be a shrink because I wanted to help people, but I soon realized after I interned for a crisis clinic that I don't have what it takes to deal with people in crisis, especially when I, myself, suffer with severe mental health issues.
I also don't agree with the way mental health doctors try to shove meds down people's throats or try to talk them into living when it's perfectly obvious that not everyone wants to live.
So, once I realized that psychology was out for me, I haven't found another calling or purpose. Not one that would be "approved" by the normies, anyway.
But, in my heart of hearts, what I truly want to do is be there for people who are suicidal. I'd like to be physically present for those who have 100 percent decided to go, so that they don't feel so alone or frightened.
I don't want to just be there for them when they talk about it and give them a safe, unsensored place to speak their higher truths, I want to physically be present for those who want a companion while they do their method and take their last breaths. I want to hold their hand if they want and just be physically present for them so that they wouldn't have to die feeling so alone and unloved and misunderstood.
After all, we come into this world with people surrounding us, so it is unfair to make people dying by suicide to exit alone if they want a companion to hold their hand, talk to them, share fond memories of their lives if they want to share, listen to their playlist with them, etc.
I've emailed Exit International about becoming a volunteer, but they never wrote back. I made the mistake of admitting that I have a mental illness, so I guess I just wasn't worthy enough or stable enough to volunteer for them.
I thought that if I explained why I felt that everyone should have an inherent right to die, it would make them appreciate why I wanted to volunteer, but, like everyone else, mental illness apparently scares Exit off, just like the rest, so I received nothing but silence in reply to my inquiry.
I've never written to Dignitas, inquiring about volunteering, because it seems like such a longshot. I live in the US for one thing, and I'm not even sure what I could really do that is useful there. I mean, they already have people there to comfort the dying, and I'm not a nurse or doctor, so I couldn't precure the drink, so, what good would I be?
Still, my true calling is to be with those who want to be accompanied while they take their last breaths through CTB, and it disgusts me that our government has made it illegal to do so.
A member on here posted a thread a few days ago about wanting someone to be there when they CTB, and I so badly want to be there for him/her, but I'm afraid of legal ramifications and all, so I didn't even reply. But that thread stirred the longing in me that I haven't really thought about in some time because it seems so unlikely that I will ever get the honor of being there for someone when they CTB.
Anyway, just my thoughts. I know it's a useless thread, I'm just frustrated that people are left to suffer alone because of stupid politics and laws, and that people who have a calling to be companions for those dying by suicide can't answer their calling that they would most likely be very good at.
Thanks for reading. I love you all!
Cupcake
All my life, I've searched for my calling, my particular purpose. I used to think that I was called to be a shrink because I wanted to help people, but I soon realized after I interned for a crisis clinic that I don't have what it takes to deal with people in crisis, especially when I, myself, suffer with severe mental health issues.
I also don't agree with the way mental health doctors try to shove meds down people's throats or try to talk them into living when it's perfectly obvious that not everyone wants to live.
So, once I realized that psychology was out for me, I haven't found another calling or purpose. Not one that would be "approved" by the normies, anyway.
But, in my heart of hearts, what I truly want to do is be there for people who are suicidal. I'd like to be physically present for those who have 100 percent decided to go, so that they don't feel so alone or frightened.
I don't want to just be there for them when they talk about it and give them a safe, unsensored place to speak their higher truths, I want to physically be present for those who want a companion while they do their method and take their last breaths. I want to hold their hand if they want and just be physically present for them so that they wouldn't have to die feeling so alone and unloved and misunderstood.
After all, we come into this world with people surrounding us, so it is unfair to make people dying by suicide to exit alone if they want a companion to hold their hand, talk to them, share fond memories of their lives if they want to share, listen to their playlist with them, etc.
I've emailed Exit International about becoming a volunteer, but they never wrote back. I made the mistake of admitting that I have a mental illness, so I guess I just wasn't worthy enough or stable enough to volunteer for them.
I thought that if I explained why I felt that everyone should have an inherent right to die, it would make them appreciate why I wanted to volunteer, but, like everyone else, mental illness apparently scares Exit off, just like the rest, so I received nothing but silence in reply to my inquiry.
I've never written to Dignitas, inquiring about volunteering, because it seems like such a longshot. I live in the US for one thing, and I'm not even sure what I could really do that is useful there. I mean, they already have people there to comfort the dying, and I'm not a nurse or doctor, so I couldn't precure the drink, so, what good would I be?
Still, my true calling is to be with those who want to be accompanied while they take their last breaths through CTB, and it disgusts me that our government has made it illegal to do so.
A member on here posted a thread a few days ago about wanting someone to be there when they CTB, and I so badly want to be there for him/her, but I'm afraid of legal ramifications and all, so I didn't even reply. But that thread stirred the longing in me that I haven't really thought about in some time because it seems so unlikely that I will ever get the honor of being there for someone when they CTB.
Anyway, just my thoughts. I know it's a useless thread, I'm just frustrated that people are left to suffer alone because of stupid politics and laws, and that people who have a calling to be companions for those dying by suicide can't answer their calling that they would most likely be very good at.
Thanks for reading. I love you all!
Cupcake
