I wish I could just bedrot tbh

[ThatStateOfMind]

I have so much stuff to do now that school started. I don't even necessarily mean just assignments (though there's that) but I have an outdated MacBook on an outdated MacOS so setting everything up for one class in particular is such a pain. I have to use outdated software and try to make it work in the class. Lately I've been struggling with a DB server and that's currently taking ages to install via Mac's terminal. I've had to follow ChatGPT instructions because I'd be utterly lost trying to make all this work on my own.

And when I'm not doing all that (I.e. the weekends, I'm working around 7-8.5 hrs a day both days. It doesn't sound like much and I'm not even entirely hating it right now, but I just know that this WILL cause a burnout, it's just a matter of when. I get a day off next Monday which I will likely just lounge around since it's the only opportunity I'll have.

I just wish everything was simpler, between all the classes and credit hours and my job, I feel like I'm drowning with no real way to get out of it besides push through.

Literally the only thing I've been thinking of (besides CTB which has been more frequent recently) is how much easier a full time job would be in comparison to this.

Anyways rant over, I'm so lucky to have this site and all the wonderful people on it to have sort of outlet. Anyways, I'm going to go grab my cat, shower her with pets, and force her downstairs so I'm less lonely lol.

 

[KillingPain267]

Anyways, I'm going to go grab my cat, shower her with pets, and force her downstairs so I'm less lonely lol.

Sounds lovely and peaceful to have such a wonderful cat to be with
Yeah, I feel the same. I could wish to just be left alone with my tablet and movies and rot away like this. But I have to at least pretend to want treatment and try out small jobs in order to keep collecting welfare/disability money. The alternative is some full time toxic office job jjst to pay rent, draining my social energy, and destroying my lumbar spine sitting all day.

I just wish everything was simpler, between all the classes and credit hours and my job, I feel like I'm drowning with no real way to get out of it besides push through.

Literally the only thing I've been thinking of (besides CTB which has been more frequent recently) is how much easier a full time job would be in comparison to this.

You will unfortunately find out that a "full time job" has the same stressing deadlines that college classes have. And likely even more. My sibling is experiencing this now, causing them to overwork just to try to "stay on top" of daily tasks at the job. I know that if I can no longer collect disability welfare money and have to find a toxic full time job just to pay rent, that it will be the absolute end of me... in sort of a way of protest.