gardenofaphrodite
Can’t catch a break no matter what I do.
- Apr 12, 2023
- 142
I want to bang my head against a brick wall everytime I speak or am spoken to/yelled at by my mom. I want to either smash my own head in or beat the shit out of her. She makes me so fucking angry, she's such a conniving bitch. I'm tired of being blamed for shit I didn't fucking do. I'm so fucking tired of being the one thrown under the bus & used as a verbal punching bag everytime she or my step-dad is having a bad day. I'm tired of my brother always being the favorite & the one they treat better. I'm tired of my family always blaming everything on me & never letting me defend myself. I hate living here. It makes me want to die even more. I hate always feeling like the black sheep in my family, the one no one talks to or likes. I don't understand why I'm treated like this other than because I'm the eldest daughter, & oldest out of my siblings. I don't understand why I am treated like this, I just want someone in my family to treat me like a person & not something they hate or want to avoid. I just want to be treated better, I want to be allowed to be a person.
I feel like my relationship with my partner is going to be destroyed because of her. He's already fed up with her being a massive bitch constantly. He already notices how differently I am spoken to & treated. It's already getting taken out on him by her- I want him to move in with his family so he can avoid mine, but I know our relationship will suffer even more because of it. He's the only reason I'm alive right now, & if the relationship ends, I'm done. I will have nothing holding me back. I'm just so done with having a shitty life. I can't even enjoy little things, I can't even draw without getting bitched at. I can't do anything with my life. I want to die so fucking bad.
I feel like my relationship with my partner is going to be destroyed because of her. He's already fed up with her being a massive bitch constantly. He already notices how differently I am spoken to & treated. It's already getting taken out on him by her- I want him to move in with his family so he can avoid mine, but I know our relationship will suffer even more because of it. He's the only reason I'm alive right now, & if the relationship ends, I'm done. I will have nothing holding me back. I'm just so done with having a shitty life. I can't even enjoy little things, I can't even draw without getting bitched at. I can't do anything with my life. I want to die so fucking bad.
