Help i want to cbt but don't?

[llawlietswife]

is it weird that part of me wants to cbt but part of me just wants someone to save me mid attempt and get me help. i used to sh in the past and now i realise it was probably so people couldn't discredit the pain ive been through. my parents dismiss me a lot and even used to bully me for having mental health problems. when they beat me i never bruised or had much scars so ig i wanted proof. is it bad if i just want to attempt so someone truly sees my pain?

 

[Lostmyonlyson]

Maybe vent to someone close to you or seek professional help? Feelings of isolation and your pain being discredited are horrible and can be quite damaging to your well being. If you want to, you can share your thoughts as to why you feel like that.

 

[Forveleth]

There is a common phrase about suicidal people not wanting to die, just wanting their suffering to end. While it is overused in my opinion, it can be quite true. You are not alone in feeling this way. It leads to a lot of attempts being labeled as "a cry for help" in some demeaning way, but if no one will listen sometimes you have to go to extreme measures to be heard.

As Lost said above, is there anyone you can reach out to? This forum is a good place to vent but reaching out to someone IRL will put you in a much better place. Are your parents still in your life? Can you get away from them? Getting yourself into less hostile environment will help a lot if you can do it.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

If you're on the fence about ctb, I'd say ctb isn't right for you at this time. It kind of really should be an "all in" kind of thing.

 

[timetogo00]

is it weird that part of me wants to cbt but part of me just wants someone to save me mid attempt and get me help. i used to sh in the past and now i realise it was probably so people couldn't discredit the pain ive been through. my parents dismiss me a lot and even used to bully me for having mental health problems. when they beat me i never bruised or had much scars so ig i wanted proof. is it bad if i just want to attempt so someone truly sees my pain?

I'm sorry you're experiencing the things you are now. When my siblings and I were growing up in an abusive household, my sister went before the church we were forced to go to every Sunday and said she wanted to die. The church elders and others were shocked and took action on this that my mother could no longer refute as things were miserable at home.

My sister was sent to a psychiatric ward and she did get better after that. Be careful but wisely do what you need to get some help. Parents like my mother who bully their kids and say horrible things when you express mental distress need to be taught a lesson.

They only respect agencies and paperwork or enforcement by others like cops or CPS. Talk to a trusted person with authority. You could get a break from being around them and when you're able to do so, you don't have to speak to them or whenever you feel like it.

 

[llawlietswife]

I'm sorry you're experiencing the things you are now. When my siblings and I were growing up in an abusive household, my sister went before the church we were forced to go to every Sunday and said she wanted to die. The church elders and others were shocked and took action on this that my mother could no longer refute as things were miserable at home.

My sister was sent to a psychiatric ward and she did get better after that. Be careful but wisely do what you need to get some help. Parents like my mother who bully their kids and say horrible things when you express mental distress need to be taught a lesson.

They only respect agencies and paperwork or enforcement by others like cops or CPS. Talk to a trusted person with authority. You could get a break from being around them and when you're able to do so, you don't have to speak to them or whenever you feel like it.

ill try