I wanna get back into education

[Breadkey]

I'm a dropout and it's been thr bane of my existence. I can't help but feel extreme guilt over it. I want to make myself useful and finally enroll back to school and ut starts with asking someone for help but i genuinely can't bring myself to. Im very much overthinking but I'm scared of repeating the same old patterns again because i have a history of constantly dropping out of school and education has been very inconsistent for me. I don't want to waste my life but I'm terrified I'll repeat the same patterns again. It'd be the sixth time trying to get back into education if i do attempt to. If any of you are in therapy or have extreme like detrimental phobia of something, tell me what techniques they give you to get over your fears. I'm expecting most of the advice to be "expose yourself to your frar little by little" but genuinely how do you do that because I think my situation in particular requires to go all in

 

[Hvergelmir]

I think my situation in particular requires to go all in

Then go all in.
It might sometimes be useful to do so in a new environment, where you can start from a blank slate and then safely leave it behind.
If failure will draw people attention, it can for example be much better to challenge yourself around strangers you'll not meet again.

I'm sure, you'd get more specific advice if you revealed the nature of your phobia.

If it's just general anxiety about your abilities to study, I'd recommend engaging with an adjacent field. Start competing in chess, or code, or memory competitions, or something - whatever would prove that you have the abilities you doubt, and give you confidence as you improve, while not being important enough to break you when you fail.