I told my family about my ctb plans, was it wrong?

[Pardoe84]

A good friend knows about my ctb plans and he gave me the advice to speak with my family about it.

My father was very sad, saying he does not want that his kids die before him. And he cannot understand that i give up and want to throw away my life.

He also told my brother. He and his wife said i cannot go now, i have the responsibility to try everything to get better at first. I am 1,5 years into severe depression and PSSD (brain damage). They want me to try a new therapy. And if it does not help then i can say i will ctb. But they don't want to let me go at this point.

Now i am wondering if i should not have talked to them. I planned to go with SN in January. But now i have the feeling i cannot go. I first have to try to fight against severe depression and PSSD. But i don't have the energy. Everything was planned. My good bye letters are all written already.

 

[until death]

I wouldn't tell anyone about my plans

 

[LunarLynx]

A good friend knows about my ctb plans and he gave me the advice to speak with my family about it.

My father was very sad, saying he does not want that his kids die before him. And he cannot understand that i give up and want to throw away my life.

He also told my brother. He and his wife said i cannot go now, i have the responsibility to try everything to get better at first. I am 1,5 years into severe depression and PSSD (brain damage). They want me to try a new therapy. And if it does not help then i can say i will ctb. But they don't want to let me go at this point.

Now i am wondering if i should not have talked to them. I planned to go with SN in January. But now i have the feeling i cannot go. I first have to try to fight against severe depression and PSSD. But i don't have the energy. Everything was planned. My good bye letters are all written already.

I don't think it's a mistake. They gave you their point of view, but remember, they think "life" is above everything... They aren't living what you live either.. They don't feel it the way you feel and can't understand it.

thinks this way : for them you are already in a bad enough situation for them to say "if the next one doesn't work we will understand that you want CTB". They think that when they don't feel what you feel and don't live what you live... I think he would have already given up before you if they were there...

But I don't think they are wrong either, If you aren't sure at 100% you want to CTB then try therapy ! :)

 

[Yaffle]

I won't discuss with anybody IRL, that's why I'm thankful to have found SaSu!

 

[UKscotty]

You asked so I will give my answer, please don't take offence.

I think it was an exceptionally bad idea, now they won't trust you, will try and interfere and cause all sorts of problems.

I just never understand why anyone ever decides to tell others their CTB plans, it can do absolutely nothing good and will usually cause countless problems.

Your best bet is to say you were drunk or high and didn't mean it and hope you can con them.

 

[FuneralCry]

I personally don't really think it's the best idea if one actually wishes to go through with plans as it could just lead to other people potentially trying to interfere in plans to die. Sadly so many people refuse to see suicide as a valid option and believe that existence must be prolonged as much as possible even if the individual wishes to die, so I'd just see it as best to stay quiet to avoid further problems being caused.

 

[Deleted member 65988]

I wouldn't tell anyone about my plans

That's the one thing I always keep in mind, I personally just don't want my own autonomy to be compromised for the sake of what others want but if OP wants this for themselves and are in agreement with their family then i suppose it could help.

 

[Little_Suzy]

When you are sick and unsure of what you are feeling, it can be difficult to understand and even accept the desire to commit suicide.

Usually when you share this information people will offer help. Accept their advice and get help.

Due to the burden, you should not tell others you plan to commit suicide if you don't want help.

Many will be unsure of how to handle this heavy burden and hope you seek help. People often stay silent out of fear of saying or doing the wrong thing, and some people misinterpret and claim, "Nobody cares about them."

 

[Pardoe84]

It was no good idea it seems. My father is crying the whole day saying his kids are the most important things in his life and now he knows one of it will not be there in future anymore. He wished that i would help them when they are 80 or older but i will be away. And he would live a bitter life when i was gone. And my mother would not survive it. She surives only 3 weeks after my death. In sum, just problems caused from introducing them into my plans.

Due to the burden, you should not tell others you plan to commit suicide if you don't want help.

Yes, this was my mistake. I planned everything but told them either. They are stucked knowing they cannot do anything.

 

[Antoine_Roquentin]

I'm almost in the same boat as you. Currently I am spending some time at home because of my depression while I am secretly planning for my ctb. When my mother asked me about suicidal thoughts, I admitted reluctantly that I have "some". That made her very suspicious and she suggested to go to the psych ward. @Little_Suzy is rigth I guess, now she carries that burden and will be even more devastated if I follow through with my plans.