cinnamonsticks
Andé y fallé - ex nostalgia expert
- Aug 5, 2025
- 35
Hey people, thanks for stopping by if you did. I think this it, just prepared my two glasses of SN, hopefully I won't need a third. Thanks to the forum for everything, I tried hanging a lot but never could succeed, I would have preferred going that way but yeah. I can finally do something right, and also out of love, to finally give closure to people that had to be in my life, they didn't have it easy, they've already moved and this is the final nail in the coffin. I've been dead in life for more than 4 years now. It is scary but psychologically. I have no AE or anything, basically just took some ibuprofen and a mirtazapine to help me soothe and get sleepy (it helps me with that, not a general fact, it works differently on different people.
I'm writing this as a goodbye because I had no one to say goodbye or anything. I'm glad a space like this exists. Hopefully everything will be fine and it won't be painful haha I'll miss so many things, but life isn't worht it for me, because I destroyed it, it's my fault and I go knowing that. I've been pretty isolated in the last few months.
The sun is rising and I always loved that. I tried so hard to get better, to be a person I was proud of, but it didn't work. I'll miss my cat, but I've already been missing him for 3 years. I'll drink one glass and put some music. I'm crossing my fingers. I wished I had done it earlier, and easier haha idk why but hanging was more recomforting I guess, but maybe I was too big for it idk. If I can I'll keep it updated but I just hope I can go to sleep and just that's it.
Tengo nervios, ni siquiera sé de qué, Tal vez de vomitar o que algo salga mal, pero dentro de todo tengo calma. Hubo tantos sueños sin cumplir, arte sin hacer, esfuerzos pendientes y abrazos sin dar. Me dijeron que yo no sabía dar amor, y esa persona tenía razón, pero sé que a todos les va a ir muy bien. Siempre supe que yo fui un error y que nunca debí haber existido, vamos a ver si finalmente hago algo bueno en mi vida. Estoy haciendo esto porque no hay nada para seguir. Gracias a todos por todo, ojalá pudiera decir algo más.
Edit: Just drank, I was really nervous, this is really salty xd I tried to chug it down, i think more of vomit because of the nerves than anything, also I think it was a lot of salt, I don't know how people take 35g
I think the bad thing is the taste, I'm trying to calm down
edit just vomiting, I don't know if it will work, vomited twice already, I won't take a 2nd glasss
I'm writing this as a goodbye because I had no one to say goodbye or anything. I'm glad a space like this exists. Hopefully everything will be fine and it won't be painful haha I'll miss so many things, but life isn't worht it for me, because I destroyed it, it's my fault and I go knowing that. I've been pretty isolated in the last few months.
The sun is rising and I always loved that. I tried so hard to get better, to be a person I was proud of, but it didn't work. I'll miss my cat, but I've already been missing him for 3 years. I'll drink one glass and put some music. I'm crossing my fingers. I wished I had done it earlier, and easier haha idk why but hanging was more recomforting I guess, but maybe I was too big for it idk. If I can I'll keep it updated but I just hope I can go to sleep and just that's it.
Tengo nervios, ni siquiera sé de qué, Tal vez de vomitar o que algo salga mal, pero dentro de todo tengo calma. Hubo tantos sueños sin cumplir, arte sin hacer, esfuerzos pendientes y abrazos sin dar. Me dijeron que yo no sabía dar amor, y esa persona tenía razón, pero sé que a todos les va a ir muy bien. Siempre supe que yo fui un error y que nunca debí haber existido, vamos a ver si finalmente hago algo bueno en mi vida. Estoy haciendo esto porque no hay nada para seguir. Gracias a todos por todo, ojalá pudiera decir algo más.
Edit: Just drank, I was really nervous, this is really salty xd I tried to chug it down, i think more of vomit because of the nerves than anything, also I think it was a lot of salt, I don't know how people take 35g
I think the bad thing is the taste, I'm trying to calm down
edit just vomiting, I don't know if it will work, vomited twice already, I won't take a 2nd glasss
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