Venting I think I'll do it.

[Sebastião]

23 years old, over 6 years of therapy and psychiatric medications and well, I think that's it. I've always thought about ctb since my oldest memories but never got to the point where I had an actual plan with a date and all that. Never had any actual dreams, don't really care that much about what will happen to my loved ones after it, don't really have any will to live, just wish to stop suffering. I guess I'll try burning some coals (maybe wood if I can't get the coal by then) In the bathroom and cutting myself while getting as high and drunk as I can. Not sure what the point of this message is or if I'll even return to this site. Maybe I'll be found and survive, having to deal with the even worse pain that is seeing the worried face of my mother blaming herself for her son not being able to just be a normal happy adult, but that's a problem for even further in the future me. If I do survive I guess I'll be back to share my pain again, goodbye.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I'm sorry you're at this point in your life. A lot of us are. I'm sure, like many of us, you have good reasons for not wanting to deal with life any longer. Hey, I agree life can suck, and it does suck. I don't see any reason for it, either, anymore. It wears you down. I get it. Suffering sucks. Who the hell in their right mind likes to suffer? Not me. I think taking the time to come up with a good, workable plan is important, though, something that doesn't leave you worse off than before. A bad plan can lead to more suffering, and like I said, suffering sucks, so why risk a bad plan? I'm lucky in that I don't have to concern myself in what will happen to my loved ones after I die, because I don't have any. Don't have dreams anymore, either. Those died long ago. Nope, I don't see any reason to keep on going like I am. I'm not getting anything out of life, nor am I contributing anything to society. Sort of just taking up space. I mean we're all going to cash it in eventually anyway, right? I just hope you can look past all of your pain and suffering for a while and realize that if you truly want to get out of this thing called life, that you deserve some kind of a sound, well-reasoned approach to doing so, and in order to do that, you have to be willing to put in the time and planning to come up with a solid, well thought out plan. I think you deserve that much, don't you? Lots of good information on this this forum. I hope you take the time to read through some of it.

 

[FuneralCry]

I hope that you find freedom from your suffering, best of luck.