Venting I think I just want someone to stop me (drawing)

[squillykilly]

I often day dream of people stopping me from CTBing, I did a drawing of what my most favourite and gut wrenching one is, I often dream of running to try and jump off something or just trying to run away from the other person, and then they like, tackle me and hold me really tight, almost painfully and desperately so I can't escape their grasp. I'd kick and cry but Id be too weak to push them off me. I'd just give up and cry, go limp. Oh to have someone stop me, hold me, try so desperately to stop me from doing it.
This is just sleepy comfort. I want to be cared for.

 

[Reishi]

It's not as comforting as you might think ...
Surviving a attempt and then repeating the cycle until eventually the people who would save you don't show up for you anymore so you actually hurt yourself significantly and you now don't have anyone to care about it anymore because they know you'll just do it again until you inevitably die.

 

[monetpompo]

Surviving a attempt and then repeating the cycle until eventually the people who would save you don't show up for you anymore so you actually hurt yourself significantly and you now don't have anyone to care about it anymore because they know you'll just do it again until you inevitably die.

this kind of thing tears me apart. it seems easier to distance myself from the people who care about me so that they stop wanting to save me or talk me out of attempting. savior fantasies really are only good in your head. i wouldn't want one of my friends to save me from committing suicide because i know i would just try again after that.

This is just sleepy comfort. I want to be cared for.

thanks for showing another drawing. i hope you felt a little better after making it.