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dysthymia

dysthymia

the dead regret nothing
Dec 24, 2023
88
Everything fucking hurts. I am so tired of being in agony. I was crying just a moment ago but I remembered I can ctb anytime so I don't feel sad anymore.

It sucks that I HAVE to ctb due to pain. Don't get me wrong, I crave pain but only if I inflict it on myself rather than bc my body malfunctioning. Also, can anyone tell me some sh ideas that won't leave scars?

"My" body feels so fragile and I feel like its prisoner. I only want to do three things, that's running, throwing and lifting, but my joints are all fucked up. Puberty ruined me and made me incompatible with life. Pre-pubescent and early years of puberty, I was healthy but suddenly, I developed chronic pain and all these random diseases.

I have access to nothing other than tourniquet method right now.
 
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mortuarymary

mortuarymary

Enlightened
Jan 17, 2024
1,363
I have IBS. Do you take anything for it or the pain?
 
leavingthesoultrap

leavingthesoultrap

(ᴗ_ ᴗ。)
Nov 25, 2023
1,212
I know what you mean. Living pain free is such privilege... I hate having to deal with chronic aches. Being human seems like a pure torture at times.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
48,127
That sounds really horrible what you go through, it really is such a cruel existence where people have to suffer so much. But anyway best wishes.
 
kotonearisato

kotonearisato

memento mori
Feb 13, 2024
118
I really feel for you. I was finally diagnosed with EDS last year after many years of medical mystery and chronic pain. It's so frustrating, being trapped in a body that doesn't work right. Hope you're able to find some relief soon.
 

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