I am such an idiot, such a fucking idiot arguing in my mind about the same thing and nothing comes out expect a panic attack that made the police look for me. I feel sorry bad for everyone involved because I'm a helpless child and nothing more.
Today morning I was going to school as I didn't pass last year! And with everything brewing in my mind since the holidays I had a horrible panic attack I could not control and run away. I was sleep deprived and didn't wake up on time, my mother woke me up screaming. Going to the toilet as I was waking up still this dread was building in my head that I can't fully explain, it
was like a very severe brain fog that felt heavy, my head felt heavy and dizzy (still is after so many hours). Besides the point is that that feeling was so in control that made me run away from my house, literally ran away, like some robot was inside my head and I was just a spectator.
I am still very much so confused from the fact that all this happened. That wouldn't be so bad if the cops weren't called to find me and so many other people (that some were my age also). What am I supposed to tell to these people, I have no explanation. Scum, scum, just a worthless maggot eating away anything he can just causing more trouble on his path.
I don't want sympathy I know I made a huge mistake that I can't explain no people without them rolling their eyes. Grown ass man running away from home for hours and hours.
I cannot control this brain I am a worthless idiot.
Today morning I was going to school as I didn't pass last year! And with everything brewing in my mind since the holidays I had a horrible panic attack I could not control and run away. I was sleep deprived and didn't wake up on time, my mother woke me up screaming. Going to the toilet as I was waking up still this dread was building in my head that I can't fully explain, it
was like a very severe brain fog that felt heavy, my head felt heavy and dizzy (still is after so many hours). Besides the point is that that feeling was so in control that made me run away from my house, literally ran away, like some robot was inside my head and I was just a spectator.
I am still very much so confused from the fact that all this happened. That wouldn't be so bad if the cops weren't called to find me and so many other people (that some were my age also). What am I supposed to tell to these people, I have no explanation. Scum, scum, just a worthless maggot eating away anything he can just causing more trouble on his path.
I don't want sympathy I know I made a huge mistake that I can't explain no people without them rolling their eyes. Grown ass man running away from home for hours and hours.
I cannot control this brain I am a worthless idiot.
