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sorrymyfault

Member
Oct 30, 2024
51
I am such an idiot, such a fucking idiot arguing in my mind about the same thing and nothing comes out expect a panic attack that made the police look for me. I feel sorry bad for everyone involved because I'm a helpless child and nothing more.

Today morning I was going to school as I didn't pass last year! And with everything brewing in my mind since the holidays I had a horrible panic attack I could not control and run away. I was sleep deprived and didn't wake up on time, my mother woke me up screaming. Going to the toilet as I was waking up still this dread was building in my head that I can't fully explain, it
was like a very severe brain fog that felt heavy, my head felt heavy and dizzy (still is after so many hours). Besides the point is that that feeling was so in control that made me run away from my house, literally ran away, like some robot was inside my head and I was just a spectator.

I am still very much so confused from the fact that all this happened. That wouldn't be so bad if the cops weren't called to find me and so many other people (that some were my age also). What am I supposed to tell to these people, I have no explanation. Scum, scum, just a worthless maggot eating away anything he can just causing more trouble on his path.

I don't want sympathy I know I made a huge mistake that I can't explain no people without them rolling their eyes. Grown ass man running away from home for hours and hours.

I cannot control this brain I am a worthless idiot.
 
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Reactions: Sleepy.Pige00n, rozeske, FailedBeing and 1 other person
Crow_88

Crow_88

Experienced
Dec 30, 2024
232
I hear you. And I understand you. I suffer from something similar. And feel the same way after.
 
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Reactions: sorrymyfault
maniac116

maniac116

My own worst enemy🌹💔
Aug 10, 2024
1,604
I had panic attacks after cancer. I'd run out of my house in the middle of the night. It was horrible!
Can't you get some meds for that?
I did & its really really helped...🤗🌹💔
 
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Reactions: sorrymyfault
S

sorrymyfault

Member
Oct 30, 2024
51
I hear you. And I understand you. I suffer from something similar. And feel the same way after.
Fortunately or unfortunately this was the first time I've done this. I don't know your situation, obviously if you are comfortable sharing it I'm here to listen, for me it was such a mind control that I couldn't control my body rational for a few hours at least, then I sat and thought about it all and I am still thinking about it still and about how many problems mental illness has brought me (I didn't mention it but I also have avpd which also took a major part in this). I'm sending virtual hugs to you!!
I had panic attacks after cancer. I'd run out of my house in the middle of the night. It was horrible!
Can't you get some meds for that?
I did & its really really helped...🤗🌹💔
I'm really sorry about your cancer I'm glad it's gone forever!

Unfortunately here you can't get medication here unless you are of most priority, it sucks but at least I can look back at all that lead up to this point and try to navigate it so it nevers happens again
 
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