Humble
Just chillin'
- Nov 26, 2023
- 52
I used to attempt by swallowing a shit ton of paracetamol when i was much younger and I can't help but feel like I was so dumb and such a coward because I knew it woild take a while to kill me and I never took the right thing yk. I could've taken something much more lethal, but i was just so scared. Life is better, but I still somewhat regret not doing it. I still feel like I'll end up dying by suicide or a car crash somehow.. that I won't get to live too long. I cant shake that feeling off. I'm pursuing medicine but I dont know if its my passion, i would rather do something related to space i guess. I dont hate medicine, sometimes theres a fire lit inside me, and other times i dont know why I'm doing this.. i feel like I'm not capable enough for this. I dont really belong in my college either, all of my life I've spoken English as if its my mother tongue, and now that I'm in college I have to speak arabic, but I cant connect with people like in English, or understand jokes sometimes...
I hope with time someone will see me and be my closest friends that understand me totally. I have a friend group but I still feel so alone.
I hope with time someone will see me and be my closest friends that understand me totally. I have a friend group but I still feel so alone.