The Disqualified
Disqualified as a Human Being
- Feb 4, 2023
- 208
Suicide is the only way I am getting out of this one. I must kill myself.
Today was extremely painful, deeply so. The pain I feel is so great it makes me want to fall to the floor and cry. I feel a strong urge to kill myself. I must do it.
Living in human society is so torturous. Seeing other people, comparing myself to them, looking at all the missed opportunities, all these things torture me day and night. My pain is so great it makes me want to collapse and cry all night. Every time I try to improve, I feel immense pain and anguish, all for limited results. You just never get there. It doesn't even matter how hard you try. I could never have a normal life no matter how much I tried. The loneliness eats me up inside. I just want to kill myself and end this horrible mistake.
I keep thinking about that day where that horrible unthinkable thing happened, and since then all my life plays out in my head non-stop. I feel caged, cornered, without options. I feel horrible, so horrible. All I want is to kill myself and end my suffering. I usually just eat sweet food to soothe myself, and try to forget about everything until these feelings go away.
With each passing day, I grow more and more desperate. I don't know what will become of me in the near future. I will either make a scene or die forever and for good.
I fear Suicide is the only way I am getting out this one.
Today was extremely painful, deeply so. The pain I feel is so great it makes me want to fall to the floor and cry. I feel a strong urge to kill myself. I must do it.
Living in human society is so torturous. Seeing other people, comparing myself to them, looking at all the missed opportunities, all these things torture me day and night. My pain is so great it makes me want to collapse and cry all night. Every time I try to improve, I feel immense pain and anguish, all for limited results. You just never get there. It doesn't even matter how hard you try. I could never have a normal life no matter how much I tried. The loneliness eats me up inside. I just want to kill myself and end this horrible mistake.
I keep thinking about that day where that horrible unthinkable thing happened, and since then all my life plays out in my head non-stop. I feel caged, cornered, without options. I feel horrible, so horrible. All I want is to kill myself and end my suffering. I usually just eat sweet food to soothe myself, and try to forget about everything until these feelings go away.
With each passing day, I grow more and more desperate. I don't know what will become of me in the near future. I will either make a scene or die forever and for good.
I fear Suicide is the only way I am getting out this one.
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