Venting I miss my friends so much

[CelesteLove]

Today 5 years ago I lost all of my friends due to my mental instability. On November 2020, I had my first attempt in the middle of the pandemic. That coupled with me having a different personality randomly (I have no Idea why I have a different personality every day but I digress), all my friends slowly stopped talking to me, and my two best friends blocked me everywhere. I miss them so much. I don't really know what to do, I tried to move on, to get new friends, but it's not the same. I get so sad when I remember their friendship, and regret all the bad things that I did to them unknowingly. I wish I was a better friend, a better person. I feel like I'm Jinx from Arcane, when she killed her friends — I mean, I didn't kill anybody — but the feeling of betraying them is the same.
I might just CBT someday to try to stop feeling like this.
</vent>

 

[Karrikin]

Today 5 years ago I lost all of my friends due to my mental instability. On November 2020, I had my first attempt in the middle of the pandemic. That coupled with me having a different personality randomly (I have no Idea why I have a different personality every day but I digress), all my friends slowly stopped talking to me, and my two best friends blocked me everywhere. I miss them so much. I don't really know what to do, I tried to move on, to get new friends, but it's not the same. I get so sad when I remember their friendship, and regret all the bad things that I did to them unknowingly. I wish I was a better friend, a better person. I feel like I'm Jinx from Arcane, when she killed her friends — I mean, I didn't kill anybody — but the feeling of betraying them is the same.
I might just CBT someday to try to stop feeling like this.
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I'm in the same spot, you obviously can't replace them and it's a long process to get over them. Which sometimes, that doesn't even happen --at least, I won't, I think. Friendship is a complicated thing despite it seeming so simple honestly. But I hope everything goes well for you, whatever it is you end up deciding.

 

[CelesteLove]

I'm in the same spot, you obviously can't replace them and it's a long process to get over them. Which sometimes, that doesn't even happen --at least, I won't, I think. Friendship is a complicated thing despite it seeming so simple honestly. But I hope everything goes well for you, whatever it is you end up deciding.

Thank you, I hope that everything goes well for you too.