I figure some might be interested in my story, how I got here. Feel free to ask questions.
In a nutshell, for me, it doesn't get better. My future is guaranteed suffering.
Just living out my last days in peace without hardly disturbances. A few of you here might remember some of my background. But I'll answer things that got me here, and you'll see why I feel so hopeless.
I really didn't want it to get to this way. Even though I had a rough time in life, in my own realm, I really did the best I could. I just got dealt some really bad cards and got mislead/ betrayed. Now I've accepted my future is going to be a living hell, or hopefully I go painlessly and rest peacefully on a good note. We all reach this at some point. It's better to just go at the right time, controlling your own destiny, instead of living a world of suffering and pain, and reach that anyways. Whether young or old, a happy or sad existence, we all meet the same fate in the end.
I had a lot of potential. But the worst luck, in how my hopes and dreams were destroyed.
Basically, I got setup. In so many ways. From years of control. After i worked so hard from trying to beat a nasty autoimmune disease that almost killed me. And I reaped nothing from it but all the bad. I got taken advantage of and it wasn't obvious until later. There was no way to tell.
No matter how good or bad I did in life, even in my position, I got nothing but shit from most others. Either they tried to ride off me when things were good, or spat in my face when I was down. I've even been insulted for being kind and trusting, to the people youre supposed to.
I just don't think this place is meant for me. I don't like this world of lies and deceit. I was taught early to stand against things when theyre wrong even when the crowd is going against you.
There's no real justice in this place. Just surface level horseshit.
I was taken for granted, on so many things. Maybe one day, people will realize the value I had when I was around, and could have rewarded and uplifted me, instead of bringing me all the way down. The reason so many did this to me, and so few supported, I'll never understand. I see wicked people every day worshiped and get brought up when they've done nothing but real evil their whole lives.
This world is simply a forest of many illusions. I hope for a silent infinity, or a return to a much better place. Either works.
---------
Anyone? Please talk, ask me questions. I just don't know where to begin. This is a can of a lot of worms. I'll be up a while. I am in the "final hours", however long that may be.
I am grabbing some food and will return.
In a nutshell, for me, it doesn't get better. My future is guaranteed suffering.
Just living out my last days in peace without hardly disturbances. A few of you here might remember some of my background. But I'll answer things that got me here, and you'll see why I feel so hopeless.
I really didn't want it to get to this way. Even though I had a rough time in life, in my own realm, I really did the best I could. I just got dealt some really bad cards and got mislead/ betrayed. Now I've accepted my future is going to be a living hell, or hopefully I go painlessly and rest peacefully on a good note. We all reach this at some point. It's better to just go at the right time, controlling your own destiny, instead of living a world of suffering and pain, and reach that anyways. Whether young or old, a happy or sad existence, we all meet the same fate in the end.
I had a lot of potential. But the worst luck, in how my hopes and dreams were destroyed.
Basically, I got setup. In so many ways. From years of control. After i worked so hard from trying to beat a nasty autoimmune disease that almost killed me. And I reaped nothing from it but all the bad. I got taken advantage of and it wasn't obvious until later. There was no way to tell.
No matter how good or bad I did in life, even in my position, I got nothing but shit from most others. Either they tried to ride off me when things were good, or spat in my face when I was down. I've even been insulted for being kind and trusting, to the people youre supposed to.
I just don't think this place is meant for me. I don't like this world of lies and deceit. I was taught early to stand against things when theyre wrong even when the crowd is going against you.
There's no real justice in this place. Just surface level horseshit.
I was taken for granted, on so many things. Maybe one day, people will realize the value I had when I was around, and could have rewarded and uplifted me, instead of bringing me all the way down. The reason so many did this to me, and so few supported, I'll never understand. I see wicked people every day worshiped and get brought up when they've done nothing but real evil their whole lives.
This world is simply a forest of many illusions. I hope for a silent infinity, or a return to a much better place. Either works.
---------
Anyone? Please talk, ask me questions. I just don't know where to begin. This is a can of a lot of worms. I'll be up a while. I am in the "final hours", however long that may be.
I am grabbing some food and will return.
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