Venting I just want to disappear

[Néncel]

I cant do this anymore, I finally has someone I loved and I lost It because Im dumb, I never had much left ti live for... But after this, and how It ended, so much lies and difamation. Yeah, I know, breakups are lame, but its been so long... I dont want to die but how can I go on??

 

[day]

Love is such a complicated mess sometimes, no one deserves to have their heart broken like that. I wish you the best moving forward OP.

 

[d3c96524be95]

Have you been able to try the usual stuff, like going to a doctor, try some meds, go through some kind of therapy? If you don't want to die, you're at low risk of being coerced into anything, and you can just experiment a bit with what they have to offer, see if anything helps and drop what doesn't.

Breakups often hurt immensely, I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I've seen some needing years to heal and process but eventually being able to fully recover and enjoy the most out of their lives. Please don't take unrecoverable decisions unless you're really 100% sure there's nothing else you can do and that's what you want.

Edit: and I don't think you're worthless, but whatever, I won't convince you I guess.

 

[Néncel]

Thank you for your words. Yes, I've been to the doctor and therapy, It helps, but I run out of money and I can only affiord therapy every two months. Meds help, I've been trying some of them these lasts 5 months, but I fear getting addicted. Thank you for saying Im not worthless, I dont want to be, but I struggle to find worth in me after being such a failure

 

[FuneralCry]

I've always just wished to disappear, a peaceful escape from all the suffering has always sounded so ideal for me, it must be tiring being trapped in that situation.

 

[d3c96524be95]

Thank you for your words. Yes, I've been to the doctor and therapy, It helps, but I run out of money and I can only affiord therapy every two months. Meds help, I've been trying some of them these lasts 5 months, but I fear getting addicted. Thank you for saying Im not worthless, I dont want to be, but I struggle to find worth in me after being such a failure

Regarding "addiction", some of them can indeed create some sort of dependency, but I'd argue that after 5 months you're screwed anyways in that regard. You'll just have to follow the recommended scheme when stopping and it'll be fine. If it helps you now and has little to no adverse events, being addicted should really be the least of your worries. Just take it one step after another.

It's a shame that money gets in the way of proper care though. I hope you'll find workarounds. You sound pretty strong and resourceful.

 

[Néncel]

Regarding "addiction", some of them can indeed create some sort of dependency, but I'd argue that after 5 months you're screwed anyways in that regard. You'll just have to follow the recommended scheme when stopping and it'll be fine. If it helps you now and has little to no adverse events, being addicted should really be the least of your worries. Just take it one step after another.

It's a shame that money gets in the way of proper care though. I hope you'll find workarounds. You sound pretty strong and resourceful.

Oh no, I wish ffgjk Im a crybaby who cant accept his mistakes, but I'll try to get better. Right now im two weeks off meds, but Im not doing good