I have no idea if I’m a bad person or not.

[Mutilateme]

I've been told by a few people that I have a victim complex. Or that I'm manipulative. Selfish, delusional. And I have no idea if I'm those things or not. I wanna know because I wanna work on it if I am. I've tried the best based on my knowledge but I have no clue if I'm being a bad person or not.

 

[Hollowman]

I struggle with self awareness too. I think we're all a mixture of good and bad.

 

[Mutilateme]

I struggle with self awareness too. I think we're all a mixture of good and bad.

I agree. I wanna be the best I can but I feel like nobody's willing to let me know what to do to be better till it's too late

I shouldn't rely on people to let me know when I'm messing up all the time but I feel that there's really only so much I can do for myself.

 

[Hollowman]

You can't really be sure they know, just because they all agree on something doesn't necessarily mean they're right. But I'm just a brain injured guy that's given up on relationships /friendships so what do I know.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I imagine- the fact that you're annalysing your own behaviour to see whether you are at fault means you care enough to not be a bad person- so- that puts you more in the good bracket I would have thought.

Can you think of particular instances where people have said you have been manipulative? Then maybe ask yourself honestly- were you being honest? Did you exagerate things to receive pity, or to get your own way?

I have to say- I grew up with a (suspected) narcissist. They told so many lies about me to parents, teachers, friends. They constantly played the victim and blamed me. My life was hell at that point. I realise that makes me sound like I'm trying to be the victim. Now, I think I was. At the time, I was just confused and scared.

I think if you really do want to try this self introspection and you're really not sure- you probably need specifics from people. Then, you probably need to be honest with yourself on why you behaved that particular way.

I think it's brave of you to face this though. We all have faults- of course. It can be really unpleasant trying to acknowledge them and change them though. I wish you luck.

 

[cryvinglightning]

a bad person would jump through hoops to explain how they're not that bad and how their behavior is justified. you seem to have a lot of self awareness and desire to change and work on your nehavior. i guess that's a really good thing.

 

[R_N]

People who say that usually never introspected themselves. In their mind they are always right and when others do what they dislike those people are wrong to them.

Do you ever see them ruminating over their own behaviours like you do? Exactly.

 

[Mutilateme]

People who say that usually never introspected themselves. In their mind they are always right and when others do what they dislike those people are wrong to them.

Do you ever see them ruminating over their own behaviours like you do? Exactly.

I imagine- the fact that you're annalysing your own behaviour to see whether you are at fault means you care enough to not be a bad person- so- that puts you more in the good bracket I would have thought.

Can you think of particular instances where people have said you have been manipulative? Then maybe ask yourself honestly- were you being honest? Did you exagerate things to receive pity, or to get your own way?

I have to say- I grew up with a (suspected) narcissist. They told so many lies about me to parents, teachers, friends. They constantly played the victim and blamed me. My life was hell at that point. I realise that makes me sound like I'm trying to be the victim. Now, I think I was. At the time, I was just confused and scared.

I think if you really do want to try this self introspection and you're really not sure- you probably need specifics from people. Then, you probably need to be honest with yourself on why you behaved that particular way.

I think it's brave of you to face this though. We all have faults- of course. It can be really unpleasant trying to acknowledge them and change them though. I wish you luck.

I have no idea. I feel like even coming out and asking the question whether I'm a bad person or not is me farming for compliments. I was told that manipulation is done on purpose and I'd like to say I'm not doing it on purpose but I've had a few people tell me I am. Maybe I just don't notice what I'm doing

People who say that usually never introspected themselves. In their mind they are always right and when others do what they dislike those people are wrong to them.

Do you ever see them ruminating over their own behaviours like you do? Exactly.

I don't see people ruminating on that yeah but maybe that's just me not paying attention. I'm not around these people all the time so maybe I just don't notice the work they are doing on themselves