I have met a new woman from an app... we text the whole fucking day

[noname223]

She is again teacher. She is closer than the last teacher considering where she lives. I have met her on a certain app where frustrated men mocked me for my post. But several women were interested and texted me. One of them told me instantly she has no interest in dating a college student. With the second one I am texting so freaking much since yesterday. Today a third woman wanted to start texting with me because she liked my post (the post men mocked me for). And I told her I have a guilty conscience texting with her because I feel like it gets serious with the second woman. But this is also only one reason. I feel like I simply don't have the capacity anymore. It is so hot. I sleep so bad because of the heat. I think strategically that's a mistake. The disappointment just will hit harder. But really. I cannot text more. I am addicted to texting but it gets crazy. I hope she does not have borderline (Again) This would be really insane statistically. I might be paranoid though. But two of the three last women I dated had borderline. And I suspected it in the third one. I am really scared to become psychotic. I tend to become paranoid when I meet new women. It is important to postpone it as long as possible. Many are pretty scared witnessing me becoming paranoid.

Many things remind me of the last teacher I dated. There are some similarities. But please don't become psychotic about that. I think we match pretty well thus far. Don't get your hopes up too high. If I become psychotic and ruin it I will be pretty suicidal. She wants to phone with me someday. I will take a benzo beforehand. When I phoned the last time with the other teacher I dated I got really really paranoid.

I text with another person too. But mostly about mental health. And I don't even know the gender of that person.

It is so fucking hot where I live. It is a real pain in the ass.

I will update this thread probably. And vent about my suicidality if I fuck it up. This will break me fully.

 

[derpyderpins]

Bro at minimum props for continually getting in the door for new opportunities. I get that you are discouraged but overall you're doing well.

Hope you can fight the heat. This may be weird but you sound overheated, lol, like posting in English is a little tougher today.

 

[noname223]

Bro at minimum props for continually getting in the door for new opportunities. I get that you are discouraged but overall you're doing well.

Hope you can fight the heat. This may be weird but you sound overheated, lol, like posting in English is a little tougher today.

Thanks for your support. I highly appreciate it. I am too lazy to correct the mistakes. I am melting...

 

[CatLvr]

I applaud your optimism. Heat aside. My AC has not kicked off once today and I am already dreading the electric bill ...

Anyway back to the "girl" thing. Good luck. Me? I swore off men about 3 seconds after I said "I do" the last time. I just stayed married to him to remind myself how stupid I can be sometimes. Seriously. When this one leaves (and they always do) I am done with this whole "making a connection with other humans" bullshit. I'm gonna live the rest of my life in the peace and quiet of solitude. "Connecting" with other human beings is HIGHLY overrated.

Yeah, sorry to be a Debby Downer today. I'm gonna blame it on the heat, too.

 

[Pluto]

 

[noname223]

I think it is already over. Lol. Yesterday, we texted more than 150 Messages. Today roughly 40. And I don't know why. I think I am contributing as usual the most to these online conversations.

This morning another woman wanted to text with me. I thought I am unable to text more. And rejected her. I don't really regret it. I know I hate myself for being such an elitist but her grammar and spelling were horrible. (in her native language). I think on a dating app I would have swiped her left.

Again my hopes are way too high too early. And they fall pretty quickly. I wonder whether she will tell me the truth. It is more likely she will simply ghost me in a weird way. I have never shown such a behavior in online dating. Bruh.

 

[wham311]

I think it is already over. Lol. Yesterday, we texted more than 150 Messages. Today roughly 40. And I don't know why. I think I am contributing as usual the most to these online conversations.

This morning another woman wanted to text with me. I thought I am unable to text more. And rejected her. I don't really regret it. I know I hate myself for being such an elitist but her grammar and spelling were horrible. (in her native language). I think on a dating app I would have swipe her left.

Again my hopes are way too high too early. And they fall pretty quickly. I wonder whether she will tell me the truth. It is more likely she will simply ghost me in a weird way. I have never shown such a behavior in online dating. Bruh.

Because you're textking too much. Phones are for setting up dates. You're a busy guy with a cool life:)

 

[noname223]

Because you're textking too much. Phones are for setting up dates. You're a busy guy with a cool life:)

I have heard different opinions from women on that. Some appreciate fast responses. For some it is intimidating. And it "looks like" you have no life.

I think different people have different approaches. Idk. She just texted me back. Maybe I should wait a little bit? Idk at this point

Edit: I have to chuckle hard. So I waited to text her back. And she added a message. I am visiting my parents this is the reason why I am barely texting. She can read my mind xD She knew what Was going on in my mind.

 

[wham311]

I have heard different opinions from women on that. Some appreciate fast responses. For some it is intimidating. And it "looks like" you have no life.

I think different people have different approaches. Idk. She just texted me back. Maybe I should wait a little bit? Idk at this point

I think"the rule" is to be busy during day while you're working and living life and pretty much only use the phone to set up dates. This will make them more curious about you and want to talk more.

Match length of messages, match response times.

Corey Wayne on YouTube is someone to look up

 

[noname223]

I think"the rule" is to be busy during day while you're working and living life and pretty much only use the phone to set up dates. This will make them more curious about you and want to talk more.

Match length of messages, match response times.

Corey Wayne on YouTube is someone to look up

Is there really such a universal rule? Of course some women won't like you text so much. There was a woman I dated who rejected me for being too clingy. Others have told me they consider fast responses a sign of appreciation.

I noticed I tend to overthink texting when I try to Be strategically. In the end I think it depends on our chemistry and sometimes it fits and sometimes it does Not fit.

With the first woman I ever dated I abided such (imo) stupid rules. Not texting much will make her more curious. Tbh I think she Was pretty annoyed by my otherthinking and wanted to text with me more naturally. But for her this was Not the Deal breaker. Something Else Was it. But she wanted to text me more and stop with These stupid mind Games. She is now married to her best female friend who hated me. Lol.

 

[wham311]

Is there really such a universal rule? Of course some women won't like you text so much. There was a woman I dated who rejected me for being too clingy. Others have told me they consider fast responses a sign of appreciation.

I noticed I tend to overthink texting when I try to Be strategically. In the end I think it depends on our chemistry and sometimes it fits and sometimes it does Not fit.

With the first woman I ever dated I abided such (imo) stupid rules. Not texting much will make her more curious. Tbh I think she Was pretty annoyed by my otherthinking and wanted to text with me more naturally. But for her this was Not the Deal breaker. Something Else Was it. But she wanted to text me more and stop with These stupid mind Games. She is now married to her best female friend who hated me. Lol.

I just know that when I text too much and don't get hints I fuck it up

I do agree with you about being too strategic. It also fucks it up lol.

 

[noname223]

I think now I might have fucked it up. Yesterday, in the evening she gave me hints that we are texting too much. But with my autism and past paranoia I struggle to understand such social cues.

I am not sure whether the damage done is irreversible. Today I sent her two Short messages thus far. Gladly, not more. But usually it is too late when I get it. I am never ahead of my game, I am rather 5 hours too late every single time.

Again another woman wanted to start texting me. And I declined. She wasn't that interesting. But reading conversations in multiple conversations drives me insane even more. I hate myself. I hate myself so much if I fucked it up again.

Why can't the people be more explicit? Especially, when I ask them directly about any issues.

Theoretically, it would increase my chances with women if I texted multiple at once. But my brain can't handle that it gets fried.

 

[wham311]

I think now I might have fucked it up. Yesterday, in the evening she gave me hints that we are texting too much. But with my autism and past paranoia I struggle to understand such social cues.

I am not sure whether the damage done is irreversible. Today I sent her two Short messages thus far. Gladly, not more. But usually it is too late when I get it. I am never ahead of my game, I am rather 5 hours too late every single time.

Again another woman wanted to start texting me. And I declined. She wasn't that interesting. But reading conversations in multiple conversations drives me insane even more. I hate myself. I hate myself so much if I fucked it up again.

Why can't the people be more explicit? Especially, when I ask them directly about any issues.

Theoretically, it would increase my chances with women if I texted multiple at once. But my brain can't handle that it gets fried.

You let them come to you, especially if they're hinting that there's too much texting.

Why aren't you setting up a date yet if you text this much? That's the goal

 

[noname223]

You let them come to you, especially if they're hinting that there's too much texting.

Why aren't you setting up a date yet if you text this much? That's the goal

Tbh my friends consider the "I texted too much" theory paranoid. I showed them the conversation with Screenshots. Holy shit my brain is not made for this. Way too much ambiguity.

 

[wham311]

Tbh my friends consider the "I texted too much" theory paranoid. I showed them the conversation with Screenshots. Holy shit my brain is not made for this. Way too much ambiguity.

Same for me, I gave up lol.

 

[bankai]

you're at least lucky to enjoy this. I find constant texting so draining

 

[noname223]

My resting pulse is 114 and I just felt a cut to the quick. Damn, I feel so good...

(Bro, will I be again ghosted... Lol. Honestly, I don't know how to handle this. My friends don't read the same into our texting but I assume I texted too much. But honestly my Feelings are usually wrong because they are determined by my biggest fears and anxiety.)

 

[noname223]

Bro it hits so hard getting ghosted again. And I rejected like 4 women for her. Lol. But all of them did not really interest me. I think I was too clingy and she noticed my whole world depended on her. This conclusion also applied to the case with the chemistry master student. And honestly she was a whole red flag as I realized later. She had contact with 4 men behind the back of her boyfriend. And when I rejected my crush in favor of her she told me I am an adventure for her. She also cried in front of me which was really manipulative. Later she claimed she could never cry in front of someone else. Rertrospectively, it was pretty insane what she did. And I almost killed myself because of her. But also the systemic issues that prevent me from getting a gf. 4 months later I met a woman from a dating app who did not have any issues with my clingyness and insecurities. But as the chemistry master student it turned out she had borderline.

Maybe I have a bad taste in women. I might should not have rejected these 4 women in favor of her. But I really had many good conversations and similar hobbies with the woman who now seems to ghost me.

I don't know which conclusions to draw. This is what I almost tried after rejections that hit me.
- almost killing myself after a rejection (check)
- almost going to a sex worker after a rejection (check)
- what comes next. What is the next logical conclusion. Maybe giving up? Paying onlyfanswomen to text with me?

I might need a short break. I will spend some time with my friends and consider my options. The whole thing won't help with my therapist who already was on the edge to drop me because everything also my love life is so hopeless.

I could not cry yet. I am too paralyzed. I am sort of speechless. (After writing a wall of text)

I am already searching for justification for not killing myself for fucking it up. I make progress. Lol. Today I read in a newspaper how a man fell for a love scam on a dating app. He invested in a crypto scam by a woman on such a dapp who was allegedly into finance. He even borrowed money from his loved ones. The newspaper described how it ended. They had no argument. The contact just decreased over time and everyone went on with their lives. The newspaper even interviewed the scammer. They have a guilty conscience. They often come from the Philippines. It must be fucked up to be in such a business. Seemingly, they are doing drugs and order escort women to motivate their staff.

I mean at least I have not lost all my savings. I would definitely ctb over that. I cannot imagine the pain if something like that happened to me. The man was able to work. I think for him it is not everything he will ever have. But for me someone who will be dependent on welfare. Holy shit. There were sketchy women on dating apps that looked like scammers when they texted me. But I blocked them off. They were stupid scammers. But technology advances and scams get better and better. The scammers in my case (two times this happened at least) surrender when I asked them about details in their profiles/hobbies.

Maybe the theory about being too clingy is bullshit.She gave me her nuumber yesterday why would she have done that in this case?
Yesterday I sent her a picture of me for the first time. Maybe she just dislikes my outer appearance. I am not her type. Many or some women told me I was good-looking. Maybe because it is not an insecurity of me I consider it less likely. In the end I will probably never have certainty.

 

[Dejected 55]

All the "rules" people talk about for dating. It's bullshit!

Text too much? Bad. Don't text enough? Bad. Guess wrong? Bad. Guess right? Still somehow bad. Bullshit!

Most marriages end in divorce, people cheat on each other, relationships outside of marriage don't last very long... IF all these "rules" were so good, why do the people following them have only marginally better success than the rest of people?

People just suck. Some are scared, and that can be frustrating if you like someone and you feel like they like you but they are scared and you don't know how to break through... but everyone else just sucks.

 

[wham311]

Yea I've seen a dude who couldn't be more insecure and inappropriate and needy do really well with the girl he's with. Iys the first time I've ever seen it like that but who the fuck knows.

 

[bankai]

Yea I've seen a dude who couldn't be more insecure and inappropriate and needy do really well with the girl he's with. Iys the first time I've ever seen it like that but who the fuck knows.

That's because there's someone for everyone. And also if you keep trying you can even be a three but still get a nine out of 10 girl. It's very hard though, of course. And there's going to be a lot of rejection and heartbreak on the way to that.

 

[Hollowman]

That's because there's someone for everyone. And also if you keep trying you can even be a three but still get a nine out of 10 girl. It's very hard though, of course. And there's going to be a lot of rejection and heartbreak on the way to that.

There's not someone for everyone.

 

[noname223]

Yea I've seen a dude who couldn't be more insecure and inappropriate and needy do really well with the girl he's with. Iys the first time I've ever seen it like that but who the fuck knows.

Why should I take advices from someone who already gave it up with women because of his own inabilities and flaws? Dating experts like Corey Wayne are trash. I have friends who watch such people and they have less success than me with women.

I am not sure about the reasoning why she ghosted me. She gave me two hours before she started ghosting me her phone number. Something she is really careful with. It seems illogical. Because the whole clingyness Was clear earlier.

 

[wham311]

Why should I take advices from someone who already gave it up with women because of his own inabilities and flaws? Dating experts like Corey Wayne are trash. I have friends who watch such people and they have less success than me with women.

I am not sure about the reasoning why she ghosted me. She gave me two hours before she started ghosting me her phone number. Something she is really careful with. It seems illogical. Because the whole clingyness Was clear earlier.

Ive had many multi year long relationships, doesn't seem like youre close to that and desperate for advice but unwilling to take any and just want to complain.

Good luck

 

[noname223]

Ive had many multi year long relationships, doesn't seem like youre close to that and desperate for advice but unwilling to take any and just want to complain.

Good luck

I have read some of your posts and you describe that you fucked up several relationships where it was your fault. I am still cautious to get advices from you on this. You seem to have been handed a tough hand in life though.

Maybe you have a point that less texting and earlier meeting in real life might be good.

I think though it is pretty hard to say what her reason was for losing nterest in me. Based on my forum posts it is clear how needy, dependent and insecure I am. But I think women cannot read me like that. Or at least we don't know that/there is no clear evidence. Here are my past Dating experiences from this year.

The first women I texted so much with me became intimate with me. And I am quite sure not the insecurities and the neediness was the issue. She was even more insecure and needy than me. She had borderline first she idealized me then the opposite happened.

The second did Not realize any of that. She told me she appreciates our conversations. We had arguments over AI and a couple of misunderstandings though. I showed the Screenshots to my friends and they agreed her take on AI was complete bullshit. The misunderstandings were on one part my fault but she also contributed to that.

The third: was very superficial and wanted me to confirm that she looks like famous actresses. We texted for some days a lot. But I think I was more of a distraction for her. I think the distance was an issue too and her career plans sounded delusional. In the end I think I am glad our paths split.

With the woman now. I Was a little bit overwhelmed because we had similar hobbies. I think reading my posts give a wrong impression of our interactions. My texts here are shaped by my anxieties and paranoia. And when I argument here it sounds pretty plausible what I write. Because I am Pretty aware of this paranoia. If I am more explicit with my reasoning showing evidence it is more clear that the descriptions are scewed. I had the theory she realized how clingy I was and gave me subtle and subliminal messages that she is not interested in me anymore before she stopped responding. I sent the Screenshots to other people. And they say my reasoning does Not make any sense. She does Not mention any of that. They read something completely different into the Screenshots. They said she sounds genuinely interested in me. I think my reasoning is often very treacherous. I sound smart and self-aware but people easily confirm my paranoia. I try to read the minds of people. I Do this all the time. I think to judge what is actually the truth one needs first Hand evidence. Everything I post on here is affected by my cognitive biases. In these cases I described I let my friends or strangers online screen the conversations and they give me feedback. And the feedback is often very different to the things that go through my mind.

 

[wham311]

I have read some of your posts and you describe that you fucked up several relationships where it was your fault. I am still cautious to get advices from you on this. You seem to have been handed a tough hand in life though.

Maybe you have a point that less texting and earlier meeting in real life might be good.

I think though it is pretty hard to say what her reason was for losing nterest in me. Based on my forum posts it is clear how needy, dependent and insecure I am. But I think women cannot read me like that. Or at least we don't know that/there is no clear evidence. Here are my past Dating experiences from this year.

The first women I texted so much with me became intimate with me. And I am quite sure not the insecurities and the neediness was the issue. She was even more insecure and needy than me. She had borderline first she idealized me then the opposite happened.

The second did Not realize any of that. She told me she appreciates our conversations. We had arguments over AI and a couple of misunderstandings though. I showed the Screenshots to my friends and they agreed her take on AI was complete bullshit. The misunderstandings were on one part my fault but she also contributed to that.

The third: was very superficial and wanted me to confirm that she looks like famous actresses. We texted for some days a lot. But I think I was more of a distraction for her. I think the distance was an issue too and her career plans sounded delusional. In the end I think I am glad our paths split.

With the woman now. I Was a little bit overwhelmed because we had similar hobbies. I think reading my posts give a wrong impression of our interactions. My texts here are shaped by my anxieties and paranoia. And when I argument here it sounds pretty plausible what I write. Because I am Pretty aware of this paranoia. If I am more explicit with my reasoning showing evidence it is more clear that the descriptions are scewed. I had the theory she realized how clingy I was and gave me subtle and subliminal messages that she is not interested in me anymore before she stopped responding. I sent the Screenshots to other people. And they say my reasoning does Not make any sense. She does Not mention any of that. They read something completely different into the Screenshots. They said she sounds genuinely interested in me. I think my reasoning is often very treacherous. I sound smart and self-aware but people easily confirm my paranoia. I try to read the minds of people. I Do this all the time. I think to judge what is actually the truth one needs first Hand evidence. Everything I post on here is affected by my cognitive biases. In these cases I described I let my friends screen the conversations and they give me feedback. And the feedback is often very different to the things that go through my mind.

Women want you to get along with them and to be secure. That is not easy for some people (me included).