i hate waiting for the day to end so I can sleep

[funeraleveryday]

I only want to die and think of dying but I just cant do it without a huge emotional burst, it will always be impulsive for me, and im too mentally fatigued and dissociated to plan in advance

I just walk around and drink herbal tea and time the minutes going by. Right now theres still 5 hours until I can take melatonin and sleep. It's so boring and agonizing. I only think about suicide but I just can't hang myself. I wish I was a man just so I could kill myself. Even when I have a friend I just want to die. Theres nothing that can fix my life because ive always hated life. I hate life.

 

[Unicr0n]

Sleep feels so much better than being conscious most days