Venting I hate myself

[Baron]

I hate myself for not being able to kill myself. I hate myself for not changing. I hate myself for everything I do and think about. It's exhausting. I only hate myself, noone else. I keep giving myself reasons for hating myself. Even if I do something wich is regarded as good by the majority, I hate myself for it. I've come to the realization that I can't stop hating myself. How does one live, when all you do makes you depressed. Writing this is giving my another reason to hate myself as well. It never stops. Am I insane? The more time passes the more I think that I grow more detached from reason. I fucking want to die so bad, but I'm not doing it. I'm disgusted by myself.

 

[Meteora]

Well, I guess you re in good company....

 

[AntHills]

The feeling of self-hatred and the instinct of self-preservation having the ability to co-exist is such a strange phenomenon. You're not alone though, and you definitely don't have to hate yourself for wanting to vent on SaSu.

 

[CheekyPhobia]

Some of us are simply defective; products of our lived experience. It's shocking how closely your words mirror my own.

 

[Wishing2di3]

everything you said is exactly how I feel. I wonder what it would be like to like yourself. I'll never know.

 

[ZoloftSüchtig]

I feel you so much. The only thing I guess that differs is that I do hate some other people as well. Cause there are people out there that have to at least an extent destroyed my life and as long as they won't apologise I'll hate them. Not even all of them tbh, I guess some of em are good hearted but some I just can't stand