Venting I hate men.

[milkteacrown]

I don't want to hear that not all men are bad, so if you're tempted to comment that here, just scroll off and let me rant, please.

I hate men. I hate being sexualized and I hate being abused over and over again. I feel so much rage when I'm not empty that I cut myself up and it's still not enough. I hate that I'm physically weak and will never be stronger than people who see me as a hole and an object. I can't even be "pure" in death because I've been assaulted by so many different men. I hate that the only way I can "take control" is by having sex or being sexually appealing, and even that is just a facade because they can and will take advantage of me if they think they can get away with it. Because they're "lonely." Because they "want connection." There are decent women and there are dirty women like me that men think are okay to abuse because I've sold myself.

I hate men. I can't wait to kill myself so I no longer have to share a world with them.

 

[eattwinkiesseejesus]

Felt You are not alone

 

[swell]

genuinely relate so much i hate men

 

[milkteacrown]

Felt You are not alone

genuinely relate so much i hate men

I'm sorry you both relate. Men don't make it easy to not feel suicidal in a world like this.

 

[Haematemesis]

i was just about to post my own thread about hatred, thank you
as a man i hate people but some more than others and men are included in this
it's hard to define the level of hatred i bear in my heart

 

[milkteacrown]

i was just about to post my own thread about hatred, thank you
as a man i hate people but some more than others and men are included in this
it's hard to define the level of hatred i bear in my heart

It seems like a lot of the people I meet who want to CTB have hatred, emptiness, or both in their hearts. It's a miserable world we live in; none of us opted in, and opting out is immensely difficult.

 

[divinemistress36]

Im sorry OP . A lot of men sexualize women to much (Im not saying all) and its degrading. It seems when you are down the not so good ones can sense and try to take advantage of it. Get some pepper spray for your purse

 

[50decadesleft]

True, I hate myself so much

 

[EvisceratedJester]

Yeah, I don't care if this is a vent thread because I feel like shit like this just isn't productive. Just as how men with a history of trauma because of women don't get to go around talking how they hate all women, I feel like us as women are to be held to the same standard. I'm sorry about your trauma and all, but that doesn't give you an excuse to engage in the same stupid crap that some men engage in...

 

[milkteacrown]

Yeah, I don't care if this is a vent thread because I feel like shit like this just isn't productive. Just as how men with a history of trauma because of women don't get to go around talking how they hate all women, I feel like us as women are to be held to the same standard. I'm sorry about your trauma and all, but that doesn't give you an excuse to engage in the same stupid crap that some men engage in...

I'm not bothering arguing with you.
It's really sad that another woman is choosing to not have empathy for me when the men in the comments have. You'd already be dead if you lived my life.

 

[StupidCat]

I hate men too

 

[Dejected 55]

I'm not going to ever tell someone how to feel about their own experiences. I relate in a sense, but in a slightly different way and admittedly from a male point of view.

I have never had a girlfriend. I have barely had any dates, and no woman I've ever asked out or expressed interest in has gone on a date with me. All my dates were blind/fixups/online dating. I only ever had one second date. I only ever kissed or held hands with one woman. I have had sex, but only with escorts. I didn't have a first date until I was 25. The last date I had was when I was 32. My first sexual experience I was 28. My first kiss/hand holding was about 30 I think. The last time I had sex I was 33. I have been used, rejected, ignored, called a creep. The woman I had a second date with didn't initially want to have a second date because I had not tried to touch or kiss her on the first date so she thought I didn't like her. I felt pressured to do both of those things on the second date so she would not think I didn't like her even though I felt like I was being too forward on that date. That woman told me I made her feel things no other man did, then told me she wanted to date other men though "just in case."

My parents thought I was gay because I didn't want to hang pinup posters in my room as a kid and I never had a girlfriend. I called my father after my first sexual encounter with the escort at 28 because I felt empty and disconnected and didn't know how to process what had happened since it was unemotional and with a stranger and I felt nothing inside. My father congratulated me and said he was proud of me. I guess since it proved I wasn't gay, he was proud of me for that.

I went a long time without even wanting to ask anyone out... 20+ years... until recently beginning to like someone... and that went sideways in so many ways I'm not going to even go into it. But I want to be clear. I do not hate women. I don't. I definitely hate some of the men who make it way more difficult for a man like me to be trusted, believed in, or given a chance by any woman who has been betrayed or abused or exploited. I know I'm not just competing against other men for attention but competing against all the harm caused by the bad men too.

I'm not a pacifist, but I really don't have it in me to hate anyone even some of the people in my life who have really hurt me. But I hate the world and the society that discourages people like me from being seen and accepted.

So, I get why you feel justified in hating men and I won't talk you out of it. If you've encountered even one or two of the men I've seen, you are more than entitled to it. I just wish I didn't feel like sometimes I get caught in the crossfire, and maybe one or two times I've failed in attracting a woman I really liked might have been because of something a different horrible man did to her.

 

[rs929]

I just wonder what would happen if a man posted "I hate women". Would people be just as emphatic? Or would they label him as a mysoginist and potential murderer?

I'm sorry that you feel suicidal but I feel suicidal too and I have been abused by women and I would think it would be very wrong to hate all women because of that. So I think that your post is very unfair. I won't say I want it deleted because I do believe in free speech, but I want free speech too and I do want to say that no, this post is just not ok, it's not ok to hate people because of their gender.

Best wishes.

 

[eattwinkiesseejesus]

Yeah, I don't care if this is a vent thread because I feel like shit like this just isn't productive. Just as how men with a history of trauma because of women don't get to go around talking how they hate all women, I feel like us as women are to be held to the same standard. I'm sorry about your trauma and all, but that doesn't give you an excuse to engage in the same stupid crap that some men engage in

Half of the posts on this forum aren't "productive", but it's helpful for them to have an outlet. People are here to vent, find support, and find useful information pertaining to all aspects of suicide and suicidal ideation - if men make her suicidal then this is the best place to talk about it. The last time I checked social media was crawling with a bunch of whiny men complaining about "all women" this and "all women" that, freedom of speech applies to women too.

 

[iamanavalanche]

i understand you completely. i feel this every single day

 

[JamesMoonDerWater]

I don't want to hear that not all men are bad, so if you're tempted to comment that here, just scroll off and let me rant, please.

I hate men. I hate being sexualized and I hate being abused over and over again. I feel so much rage when I'm not empty that I cut myself up and it's still not enough. I hate that I'm physically weak and will never be stronger than people who see me as a hole and an object. I can't even be "pure" in death because I've been assaulted by so many different men. I hate that the only way I can "take control" is by having sex or being sexually appealing, and even that is just a facade because they can and will take advantage of me if they think they can get away with it. Because they're "lonely." Because they "want connection." There are decent women and there are dirty women like me that men think are okay to abuse because I've sold myself.

I hate men. I can't wait to kill myself so I no longer have to share a world with them.

I hope you felt better venting here. Although im a man, i have been a victim of sa and i have a sister, whom since i had her i also had the fear of what she'll had to deal with daily. What i mean is that i cant say i relate to everything but i do understand it, truly.

In any case, in these forums there will always have the ones to shut you down and say this is "misandry" or some bs like that. I hope you can just not pay attention to those and notice that many of us do share some of that pain and aknowledge yours ❤

 

[wantingdignity]

I'm in a bit of a man hating mood at the moment too. I relate to you in the feeling like an object thing.

 

[milkteacrown]

I hope you felt better venting here. Although im a man, i have been a victim of sa and i have a sister, whom since i had her i also had the fear of what she'll had to deal with daily. What i mean is that i cant say i relate to everything but i do understand it, truly.

In any case, in these forums there will always have the ones to shut you down and say this is "misandry" or some bs like that. I hope you can just not pay attention to those and notice that many of us do share some of that pain and aknowledge yours ❤

I'm so sorry for your experiences. I know there's also a very difficult aspect of being a man and going through SA, feeling as though no one will believe you or take you seriously. Thank you for empathizing with me, and know I empathize with you, too. I hope for love and healing to come your way.
Thank you for those standing up for me, as well. I don't plan on debating them, since I know they aren't willing to understand what misogyny is and how it's different from the concept of misandry, but I appreciate everyone who shared their stories and helped to defend me around people who aren't so educated on sociopolitical matters.

 

[Alias Pluto]

We've all got our own problems. It's just as hard being a man as a woman in this world

 

[It'sMyLife]

I'm a guy and your vent is ok with me. I won't try to disqualify your feelings nor try to speak for or defend all men. I've known some real pricks in my 60 years. I've also been made a fool of by a couple of women who were total liars but I still see many women as positives in the world. The views you have now are right now and may change but if they don't I hope they don't rule your life from now on. Feeling hatred is your right but it can take over and then you lose even more time. Don't let the bastards wear you down and steer you even further off course of who you want to be. Life is a goddamn seemingly pointless roller coaster so often I know. I hope you have a better day tomorrow. You deserve to be happy

 

[Alek1=]

Yeah, I don't care if this is a vent thread because I feel like shit like this just isn't productive. Just as how men with a history of trauma because of women don't get to go around talking how they hate all women, I feel like us as women are to be held to the same standard. I'm sorry about your trauma and all, but that doesn't give you an excuse to engage in the same stupid crap that some men engage in...

Tbh if someone feels better after, then just let them vent even if they are toxic. As long as they don't act on it and are not actively harassing other men, women or anyone at all then it's not that bad.

 

[J&L383]

i was just about to post my own thread about hatred, thank you
as a man i hate people but some more than others and men are included in this
it's hard to define the level of hatred i bear in my heart

I dislike most people, too, and men especially. Don't like being around them and don't like socializing with them. Unfortunately I'm one of "them" - Yuck . I'm sorry, ladies, you truly deserve better.

 

[milkteacrown]

I've already vented my thoughts out, so I don't feel anything in particular anymore. I will unwatch the thread and will no longer see comments, but I enjoyed hearing (most of) your varied perspectives. I also would like to give a shout-out to my fan who is watching this thread to react to my replies with a "yay." I think you're trying to offend me, but I find it pretty funny.

 

[qwert3948]

being born a woman is a major reason i want to die

 

[wantingdignity]

Years ago, I used to walk to catch the train to work. One day, I found out that the bodies of two girls were found in a shopping cart in my area. It turns out that it was not far behind the trees along my path. I spent so much on Uber after that.

I wish men were held accountable for emotional regulation and for talking about women as if our sole purpose was to please them. My ex constantly complained that I wasn't doing enough for him sexually (which, you know, always puts someone in the mood to put out). He also violated my consent and once punched holes in the wall because I said I was not in the mood. He constantly apologized afterwards, but then he left me because I was suicidal. My fucked up brain still wants him back.

I grew up being taught that my purpose was to have kids, teach the world about Jesus, and submit to my husband. People blamed my dad's infidelity on my mom not being sexy enough for him. She homeschooled five kids and looked after the neighborhood kids while my dad was off doing who knows what with who knows who.

i have had multiple incidents where strange men have been sexually inappropriate with me (including inappropriate touch when I was still a kid). Most women I know have had at least one experience where a man was inappropriate with her.

It's so frustrating when people say 'Not all men.' There's a systemic problem where men believe they have a right or a say over our bodies, and they can usually get away with it.

 

[divinemistress36]

If somone has been assaulted they are going to be cautious. OP might have ptsd. Of course she is going to hate men they have used and abused her. Let her vent

 

[bankai]

I hope you heal, OP.There are a lot of opportunists out there who will take advantage of you when you're vulnerable. Both men and women. I suppose you've had especially harsh experiences with men. Hopefully the world treats you better in the future.

 

[idk3]

ryan gosling is cool tho :‑|

 

[rs929]

If somone has been assaulted they are going to be cautious. OP might have ptsd. Of course she is going to hate men they have used and abused her. Let her vent

I understand your point of view, but I have an alternative take.
Just as OP might have PTSD, this forum is replete with vulnerable mentally ill people, specially depressed ones.
Feeling guilty and bad about oneself is a telltale sign of depression. Reading how man are evil and hated may strike the wrong nerve in some of us. Specially men that were abused by women, or men who want to CTB over women and definitely don't deserve to be included in an irrational overgeneralization along murderers (there's literally a reference to murdered girls from another man-hating post in this thread).
So my point is that this might be catharthic for OP but it's not really harmless for everyone.
I hope that OP heals her wounds but I don't think hatred will help with that.