Life is a hell. If there is a hell which is worse than this, it doesn't disprove the objectively huge amount of suffering I have to go through. All I want is for it to end. I hate everything about this experience, I hate humans. If all live was ending in 1 minute and I was given a button that can stop it, I wouldn't touch it.
I tired of playing games I'm set up to lose. I tired of putting effort in vain. I'm tired of all the emotions. Of the fact that I'm breathing and also that I'm concious. I want to feel nothing, to be nothing. I just want it all to end. Not even Hitler would deserve this kind of suffering.
I hate being a man. Having to prove myself, act confident and all that shit while inside I'm breaking apart, it is not fair. I don't believe in god, but if I did I would never worship such a disgusting monster.
I tried psychadelics, don't seem to help, but at least everytime I take them I'm a little bit less afraid of death, because they make me understand how unavoidable and natural it is, maybe they will eventually allow me to find a courage to end my live.
I tired of playing games I'm set up to lose. I tired of putting effort in vain. I'm tired of all the emotions. Of the fact that I'm breathing and also that I'm concious. I want to feel nothing, to be nothing. I just want it all to end. Not even Hitler would deserve this kind of suffering.
I hate being a man. Having to prove myself, act confident and all that shit while inside I'm breaking apart, it is not fair. I don't believe in god, but if I did I would never worship such a disgusting monster.
I tried psychadelics, don't seem to help, but at least everytime I take them I'm a little bit less afraid of death, because they make me understand how unavoidable and natural it is, maybe they will eventually allow me to find a courage to end my live.
