PapaYeehaw
Indecisive 🧘♀️
- Nov 28, 2021
- 41
My biggest reason for wanting to CTB is loneliness, but the only.way to cure that loneliness is by driving since in the lovely country of the U.S., zoning laws don't allow for walkability. I live in an awful area for anything. The only place I can walk to is the nearby church that I go to twice a week despite not being a Christian because there's nothing to do.
I don't want to risk my life just to see people. Everytime I get into a car, I just think about how I could get into an awful accident and be in debilitating pain forever. I just want to end it all now so I don't have to risk that, especially since its more likely than not to happen (70% chance of getting into an accident in the U.S.) and since im a woman my chances of being permanently injured are doubled.
Even just a simple library or coffee shop within walking distance would save my life. Instead I live by an extremely dangerous highway that gets frequent accidents and pile-ups. Let's say i got into an awful accident but somehow came out okay, id still be in so much debt for years after. There's just no winning in the U.S. It's so lonely and miserable here, yet I know I'm extremely fortunate to at least have been born here and not an even more isolating place, like Saudi Arabia. I should feel lucky, but I don't. I have an amazing boyfriend that by some miracle lives a 2 minute walk away, but without friends too, it's getting depressing because he's the only thing keeping me happy. I can't even blame myself because there's nothing else around.
I don't want to risk my life just to see people. Everytime I get into a car, I just think about how I could get into an awful accident and be in debilitating pain forever. I just want to end it all now so I don't have to risk that, especially since its more likely than not to happen (70% chance of getting into an accident in the U.S.) and since im a woman my chances of being permanently injured are doubled.
Even just a simple library or coffee shop within walking distance would save my life. Instead I live by an extremely dangerous highway that gets frequent accidents and pile-ups. Let's say i got into an awful accident but somehow came out okay, id still be in so much debt for years after. There's just no winning in the U.S. It's so lonely and miserable here, yet I know I'm extremely fortunate to at least have been born here and not an even more isolating place, like Saudi Arabia. I should feel lucky, but I don't. I have an amazing boyfriend that by some miracle lives a 2 minute walk away, but without friends too, it's getting depressing because he's the only thing keeping me happy. I can't even blame myself because there's nothing else around.
